Feeling guilty for getting my cat neutered

[Sammy900]

Hey

Just wondering what other peoples views are and if I'm overthinking it or being unreasonable? I just want different opinions, experiences really so I can weigh up both sides....

Today our handsome boy cat went to the vets and was neutered and I've never felt so ethically uneasy and awful about making a decision for a pet. I feel like I've taken away his right to reproduce :(

Everyone keeps telling me it's for the best, he will be less likely to get into fights and be exposed to other illnesses from that, he won't spray around the house. We have two cats a boy and girl and they are brother and sister so it would be a whole load of wrongness later on ....

I just feel so uncomfortable about it, so much that I don't want anymore male pets now that I have to face this decision for. I love my pets and I suppose in some ways, further down the line of the argument it's unfair/restrictive to prevent anything from living a wild and free life.

I guess what I'm seeking is to weigh it all up and get my thoughts in the right frame and hopefully come to the conclusion that it WAS the best decision....any thoughts or experiences of a similar vein ? un-neutered pets that were a nightmare?

What does everyone else think?

I’m laughing at this concern that we’d run out of cats!
The Romanian and Spanish rescues dog places can start shipping cats over too if needed.
We’re really not going to run out of cats!

If this isn't a wind up then you're the type of person who absolutely should not have the privilege of pets. Your posts get more and more ridiculous so I'm hoping it's just trollery.

I wonder, your massive concern for animal rights, you're obviously the strictest of strict vegans then?

@Sammy900

Wow O.k I'm not a troll....I take on board your points and words of advice against letting the girl have a litter from a wild/outdoor tom cat (albeit harsh! calm down folks)...

So any advice on how to responsibly enable our girl cat to have a litter? / vs spaying straight away. That would be helpful.

Reproduction is a natural thing. That's why we have pets in the first place - they aren't all pests being sold willy nilly on the back streets, mistreated

Getting pregnant and giving birth may be natural but isn't without its risks.

There is no health benefit in her having a litter

Most dogs/cats have usually had enough by the time their 'babies' are taken from them. The only way they get any peace!

And I have heard of instances in controlled pregnancy/birth where it's gone horribly wrong, even with veterinary intervention and the litter and or mother has died.

Nature can be cruel. There's nothing wrong with us intervening responsibly

Yes I feel that pet animals should only be bred on purpose in controlled settings....but I would say "allowed to breed" ie not restrained and forced to breed. I think the human who decides to breed the animals should not be making a profit fom it (ie cover costs only) and that they should be ensuring that only fit healthy animals are bred. I do agree that breeding a pet animal does not usually benefit the animal. At best it does not disadvantage or injure it.
I don't know so much about cats but I do know that with dogs, there comes a point where Mum doesn't want to be a mum to the pups any more. She treats them as teenaged, then adult animals and if they are to stay in the group they must accept the adult group rules. Mum dogs don't miss being Mums! Related dogs will also attempt to breed together which is genetically a VERY bad idea.
What is normal for me is not to agonise. I do my research, make my decisions and then take action. Yes I am always worried when i have a dog neutered and happy and relived when its all over but I wouldn't consider not doing it because of an animal's right to have sex or to have a litter...that's just weird.
Pet animals absolutely do have rights! They have the right to a long healthy happy life and its up to the breeder and then the owner to ensure that this happens.

@WonderfulYou

Do people feel that cats should only be bred on purpose in controlled settings (where the human intervenes and forces them to do so...for whos benefit?)

Yes absolutely.
If there’s ever a reason why people need a cat to beed then it should absolutely be done in a controlled setting. So many things can go wrong. Mating in the animal world is often very brutal and one of them can get seriously injured or killed if things go wrong.

If there’s no reason for the cat to mate then the cat needs to be neutered and not put in that situation.

Humans have sex for pleasure. Cats don’t.

My neutered female cat was once attacked by the local Tom

She was not a willing participant.

Read the heartbreaking accounts of the abuse of children being abused and you might start to think about neutering and spaying them, instead.

Great Britain is a small densely, some would say over populated island. Never mind adding to the mix of feral dogs, cats and children.

I knew children that picked up their pet cat by the tail, whirled him around and then let go. Lovely.

Letting your cat 'have just one litter' could be exposing her kittens to that sort of abuse.

The family lived in the next road, the father self-employed, the little brother 3 years younger, and we were forced to have him playing with us at weekends, where he was allowed to insist we played cricket in the back garden all Saturday afternoon.

We once ran like mad down the entry, and in through the front door, slamming it behind us as he was chasing us wielding a full size cricket bat. The front door had 2 vertical reeded glass panels which he smashed in temper. The irate mother whacked my friend on the leg with the bat. I was just terrified she'd start on me.

He was about 8, and the 'prince' of the family.

I imagine the cat wished the boy had been neutered to calm him down, and his sister to stop animal cruelty.

Do you really want your cat's future kittens to go to a life like that?

Having a kitten in a home is like adding another baby into the mix, and the outcome cannot be predicted.

I imagine in the story above, the cat was about 4, the girl had pestered for a pet, and the pet pushed back when her little brother was born, finally arriving when he was 4 and able to 'treat it properly'.

Except he didn't, and neither did his sister.

Please unless you are going to keep all the kittens, and as house cats and turn your house into a fortress, don't. A queen can have a litter of say, 6 kittens, with 1, 2 or even 3 fathers, after multiple matings while on heat.

We were forced to take a kitten by a scheming dd and friend. The owner forgot to give its mother the pill. Rural France. The father was a feral tom, and the 3 kittens, all male the result of appalling inbreeding. Their half-brother also their uncle. They all had long front paws and could open doors. He was neutered. He hid behind a door to try and put his claws in our elderly Maine Coon's eye. He left. He was just 7 weeks old when he was dumped on us. Going to be drowned. Apparently. She never recovered her confidence.

That sort of inbred cat could father your cat's kittens.

@specialsauce

I think youre spot on with your most recent post *@Sammy900 and also @RobotValkyrie*.

There will always be a level of selfishness and cruelty with pet ownership. Just look at the horrendous health conditions pugs and other 'breeds' have to endure. All bred to satisfy our selfish wants. Pet ownership will one day be a thing of the past just like circus elephants, donkey rides and dressed up monkeys.

I agree that people have pets because they want them but I don't think there is "always an element of cruelty" Many of us campaign against the breeding of dogs with extreme brachy faces and good breeders will test their animals to ensure that things like PRA and hip displasia are not passed on. yes there are greeders and BYB's who do not care also puppy farmers and these should be (and are) being eradicated.

Cocomarine I feel uncomfortable about having neutered my cat, but did it anyway.

Hence seeking a discussion / debate to try and come to terms with the cognitive dissonance I'm experiencing

It is irresponsible to allow a cat to have a litter. There are far too many being born and not looked after. By producing more you'd just be taking homes away from some other kittens.

We let our cat have a litter when I was younger. She hated being pregnant, then went through painful birth and didn't want her kittens. Then it was like she'd lost Al enjoyment of life. They get pregnant far too young unless you're going to keep her inside for two years until she's actually mature enough to mother them. Ours rejected hers, we had to hand rear them. One died in my hands. Then once we removed them one owner didn't continue to worm it and it died horribly.

Do your pets a favour and let them just enjoy their life rather than putting her through the pain and stress of having kittens against her will.

specialsauce

Thank you for understanding my points for discussion.

There are a lot of posters on here being utterly rude without consideration....but I'm ignoring them

Honestly you did the right thing. We found kittens in our neighbours garden. When the mother and kittens were taken to a cat charity they discovered that she was in fact pregnant again. Apparently the mum came from a house around the corner, who decided not to fix her cat. Which quickly turned into multiple children and grandchildren, who became too many for the lady to manage. So she just kicked them all out, except for her original 2. Then kittens started to appear in some peoples gardens, like my neighbours. They need fixing, unless you're prepared to feel and home all future cats they produce?

I am glad to read you might reconsider a litter for your female cat. I had a rescue cat once who had previously had a litter and she mourned for them her whole life. She would take mouse toys and teddy bears etc and cry to them and try to look after them. It was the most heartbreaking thing I've ever seen.

I fell in love with Maine Coon's but always had moggies. We then got a lovely brown cream tabby with pale green eyes who, funnily enough, looked like a Maine Coon. She was neutered. In the cattery for 3 weeks she batted her eyelashes, fluffed up her fur, and called for 3 solid weeks. On collection the understandably harrassed owner asked 'You did say she was neutered?' Yes and she was. The vet said a little ovarian tissue can be left, and offered - at great expense to us - to do another exploratory operation. When she was brushed, you just couldn't do it hard enough - nose down, tail curved over, bum in the air. A complete tart!

We moved house when she was 9. The road behind us had a massive entire tom who objected to her presence and bit her. Got the bite treated. She started being ill. The vet asked us 2 years later if she'd lost weight, told us to put Olbas oil on her chest to help her get over a cold. They vaccinated her every year, hadn't bothered to weigh her. We changed vets. Feline aids. The diagnosis involved a general anaesthetic, blood tests etc etc 3/4 of the cost of a £250 pedigree kitten that could be vaccinated from birth. One of the nurses did a cat-sitting service - there was no cattery with isolation facilities in the area. She was marvellous, once taking her in for an antibiotic injection (no consultation fee). Until after a weekend away we came home to a note saying we needed to take her in.

It was a one way trip and absolutely heart-breaking. Funnily enough, when she was ill, she decided she wasn't DH's cat any more but was mine.

A year later we went, just to look, at Maine Coon kittens at a breeder's 50 miles from home. We fell hook line and sinker for a little female that could fit in the palm of my hand that was going to be a pet, not for breeding or showing.

Coco never hunted, food was from a tin. Our Maine Coon was a terror, umpteen generations of cage-bred cats, mice and birds. Pity she didn't go for magpies. We carried on the cat sitting for 12 years until we moved. She left as soon as she heard the cat-sitter arrive. We moved from an end terrace to a 4-bed detached with a massive cricket field behind the houses opposite. She stopped running off when the cat sitter arrived. She needed space to roam. I think in rural France she was an honorary member of the chase. She lived for 21 years.

Funny buggers, cats. I've had 3 females, 1 stray, 1 not 1 pedigree the other 2 moggies. All different. All adorable, except for the Maine Coon when you had a brush in your hand, she was apparently into dreadlocks.

LittleDandelionClock

Exactly...food for thought. Thanks for your comments

Also totally get that nature itself and acts of nature can be brutal...and as humans we often feel a moral obligation to intervene and prevent things from happening. Animals fight and their mating behaviour can be dangerous and painful/traumatic....but is it my right to change that if I believe it to be wrong and play god ? - that to me is like saying.... nope they shouldn't ever procreate because I think it's going to be painful...again transferring human experiences about what is right or wrong onto animals

Our pets are part of the family and personalised so of course we'd intervene to stop a fight, or take them to the vets if injured, arrange for jobs etc....

But this seems to me a step too far in being proactive.....you wouldn't send a cat to have its ears amputated to prevent future fights and infections it might or might not get - for example

The experiences that people have shared about poorly mistreated animals and neglected ones, strays/ litters that are abandoned are awful, but if you work in a setting where you deal with sick or rescue animals you are going to come across the worst of the worst and hear the most awful stories.

There are many many thousand millions of perfectly happy well looked after cats out there...they all started as kittens...and that was all because some cats mated together prior to that.

OP I don't think you could be more of a selfish fuckwit if you tried. People like you shouldn't be allowed animals.

Imagine all the litters of unwanted kittens he would have fathered. Imagine the smell as he sprays your curtains and furniture, and sprays the legs of people visiting you home and the stink of un-neutered tome cat you can never get rid of, and him crying and crying to be out when he senses a female cat who is calling for a mate. You did the right thing.

@lateforschool

I am extremely irritated by the lazy owners of the neighbourhood Tom who didn’t get him snipped so my poor little five months old tiny girl cat was lept on by their monster of a cat and had a horrible labour and a still born.

Yet, if you had spayed you kitten, or at least not let her out until she had been done, that wouldn't have happened. It's your responsibility too.

If you don't get the female cat spayed, and you let her out, then you will end up with litter after litter of kittens. Is that what you actually want, and think is the right thing to do? That could be multiple pregnancies a year, so double figures of kittens each year upwards. Why do that when there are already hundreds of thousands of unwanted cats in the UK?

AssassinatedBeauty We were going to get her spayed after one litter....currently considering the pros and cons

@LittleDandelionClock

OK *@Sammy900* I'll go against the grain, here's a question to the experts...

I am all for spaying and all 3 cats I have ever had (all female) are neutered. We knew nothing about cats when we had them, and were told this is for the best by the cats protection league.

So, the questions I would l like to put to the experts (and armchair experts...) i

'if ALL cats are neutered, where are people going to get kittens/cats from (in the future) if they want one as a pet?' Because surely we eventually will run out cats if ALL of them are neutered!'

'Or will we just keep breeding the pedigree cats? So then only well-off/rich people will be able to afford a cat?'

Off out now. Back later.

Lol. The world is nowhere near running out of cats.

@Cocomarine

I’m laughing at this concern that we’d run out of cats! The Romanian and Spanish rescues dog places can start shipping cats over too if needed. We’re really not going to run out of cats!

Add Saudi to that list. I brought 6 back with me from my time there. There are cats and kittens literally dying for a home. Hundreds of thousands of them.

That makes no sense if your objection is about the cat's rights, either it's a right or it isn't. You choosing the number of litters your cat is allowed to have isn't respecting its right to reproduce and experience having kittens.

You are also really fixated on this one aspect of your female cat's life, and want to somehow respect its rights in this one aspect. But it's entire life is under your control, it has no truly wild experiences and never will.

For the best outcome for all pet species, we should limit how many are bred and ensure that all the ones that do exist are treated properly. We are miles away from that position. Chucking more kittens into the mix won't help either.

Your cat won't feel sad that she never had kittens. But she will be in pain when forced to mate. She'll be pain when forced to give birth. And She'll miss her babies. You will do that to her. It's not allowing nature to take course. It's forcing your cat to go though a traumatic event for nothing

When I got my boy cat at 4 months I took him to be neutered. He was found to have an undecended testical that needed removed asap. If I hadn't got him neutered we would never have known until it caused real problems for him. Apparently it can cause cancer if left or a torsion.
Prob s bit more extreme but we never would have known until it was too late.