To find this unbelievably discriminatory

[bagpuss90]

I belong to a small ladies club -there’s around 15 of us . We meet for drinks, socials and various other things It’s been decided that we should open a bank account and appoint a treasurer to deal with the money side of things - I might add that we are not talking huge sums here. One of the members said she was happy to be treasurer -she works in accounts. Two of the other members have says they are not happy with her dealing with the money because she lives in a council house, is probably not financially stable and might be “tempted”. Talk about stereo type . I’m pretty sure this hasn’t got back to the person in question. It’s made me so cross -I don’t actually think I want to be a part of it anymore. I haven’t had a chance to talk to anyone else to find out what they think about these comments .

They sound awful. Do you really want to be socialising/mixing money with people like that? I would bow out of the joint bank account and continue to see the people in the group you like who aren't twats.

That is a terrible thing to say!

YANBU.

Did either of the two members who voiced such bigoted views, offer their own services?

No? Thought not !

You probably won't change their mindset ,personally I would just back out of the group

Ignorance and negative conditioning. Your opportunity to draw to their attention their unexamined assumptions.

Utterly vile. I would need to say something. I would be calm but to the point "I am really uncomfortable with the suggestion that a person could be deemed untrustworthy simply because he or she lives in a council house."

I could not have sat there and said nothing

Have you confronted them? It doesn’t need to be aggressive but I would point out she works in accounts and is willing to do it; are they?

It’s a fair point to raise to have more than one set of eyes on the money so maybe there should be two signatories and/or someone to check over the books periodically but tbh that starts sounding like a fairly big task to take on and it may be worth leaving it completely. If the trust isn’t there, no issues are being resolved or life made easier by having a bank account. In fact this could trigger the end of your group imho.

I’m appalled. Vile comments.

I would say it’s time for these ‘ladies’ to find themselves another club. They’re basically slandering another member, it’s completely unacceptable.

Leave the group and take the lady from the council house with you.

I'd be saying something, to the group as a whole to be honest, but I'd forwarn the person it's about first, but then I live in a council house and have had money problems and have faced the stigma of people thinking I've got questionable morals because of those things, not the actual person that I am.

They're entitled to their views, just as you're entitled to decide whether you want to be a part of this group. I'd assume it will be put to a vote and if they're the only two with an issue the woman will win anyway.

I would have said a lot to this pair and by the end if it we would definitely not be friends.

How dare they make this ludicrous assumption.

There are people from all walks of life who are not whiter than white.

I'd have left the group too and given them details of why I had to leave.

Whilst that's a nasty thing to say about anyone, it is quite normal good practice for any organisation like this to have a bank account that requires two signatories for everything. You don't have to be in a council house to be in financial trouble and I would be suspicious of the people who raised the possibility as their thoughts clearly lept to how the setup could be abused pretty quickly. Abandoning the group would be a bit of an overreaction but if its existence is being formalised with the creation of a bank account then you need a written constitution which states how decisions will be made about the distribution of assets, how authority will be elected and transferred, etc. That document can also specify that the group will not tolerate discrimination on grounds of (list everything including financial status) to make it clear that those views are not welcome.

Did you pull them up on it when they said it? I couldn’t bite my tongue, I would have to say something there and then. The older I get the more I don’t let people get away with saying crap without pulling them up on it.

Horrible thing to say about anyone
You can make it so that you need 2 signatories to withdraw from the account

I'd call them up on it and make the other woman aware of what absolute bitches they are and leave if I am honest.

You are correct that council house does not mean bad with money.

However, good credit is actually a prerequisite for many jobs with fiduciary responsibility.

Where someone lives doesn’t really tell you about their credit history though. People in the fanciest houses often are the most overextended.

Nothing at all ladylike about that kind of judgment. I'd not want to be part of the group.

I’d have just said ‘what exactly do you mean by that? Could you clarify please?’ Call them out on it. However, I agree with PP who have said that maybe these aren’t the sort of people you want to be hanging out with. What do they say about you?

I can only imagine all the drama later on
Leave now

@DriftingBlue

You are correct that council house does not mean bad with money.

However, good credit is actually a prerequisite for many jobs with fiduciary responsibility.

Where someone lives doesn’t really tell you about their credit history though. People in the fanciest houses often are the most overextended.

My credit score was hundreds better when I was in council housing. It's shite now I have got my own house. No idea why as my outgoings are the same and I am on more money.

“I’m appalled by that insinuation to be honest, and deeply uncomfortable with my position in the group if that is the general feeling.”

Probably too late to challenge them now if it was a passing comment, but I'd be finding another group of small ladies to hang out with.