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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sister's boyfriend and his karaoke obsession.

254 replies

HappyDays40 · 02/11/2021 04:58

Sister has a boyfriend who I don't like but put up with to keep her happy. They are coming for Christmas staying with our parents. For the first time we are at ours for Christmas which I am pleased about. He has apparently paid to hire a karaoke machine for Christmas day. I hate karaoke I would have to leave the house for the day. He is planning on setting up in my hallway which is the main access to the rest of the house. The thought of not being able to talk for listening to him singing droney songs makes me mad. Ive told him no he is pissed off now he and my sister who I do want to see aren't coming. She is pissed off at me because I said no politely. I just said it'll be too much. Apparently it was a special treat and he has paid hundreds that he can't get back.
Unreasonable behaviour on my part or not?

OP posts:
Ughmaybenot · 02/11/2021 08:10

I died a little bit inside just reading your op, why the fuck would he do that?! You’re absolutely not in the wrong, and well done for being polite in saying no… I’m not sure I would’ve been polite exactly Hmm

Original poster
HappyDays40 · 02/11/2021 08:18

I think its the massive style ones with a small PA. Luckily my neighbours are far away so no issue there its just the presumption and the intrusion. He used to do karaoke as his business so it is a passion. He "specialises" in Frank Sinatra give me strength.

OP posts:
Original poster
HappyDays40 · 02/11/2021 08:20

I keep my sister close as she has been abused before. As much as she irritates me at times no matter her behaviour she has an open line to me any time day or night

OP posts:
Summerfun54321 · 02/11/2021 08:20

I would LOVE that, I love karaoke!! Send him round to my house instead 😂

RockinHorseShit · 02/11/2021 08:21

He's a CF, who accepts an invite & then thinks it's okay to book something so intrusive at the host's house. He can feck right off & I don't actually mind karaoke, but this would boil my pee.

Just say a very firm NO

Motnight · 02/11/2021 08:22

What do your parents think Op, after all it is their house?

TheOccupier · 02/11/2021 08:23

YANBU! I take it you don't have a garage? I'm sure even if he can't get the money back, he can move the date of the hire to a day when he can do it at his own place. Don't back down!

SpiderinaWingMirror · 02/11/2021 08:26

Jeez yanbu.
It's bad enough when my inlaws start banging drums and singing. They thoroughly enjoy it. Gives me an instant headache and I want to kill people. In my own house, it does not happen

MrsClatterbuck · 02/11/2021 08:26

@SmileyClare

Can you elaborate on his karaoke obsession and the reasons you dislike him?

We used to have a neighbour who was obsessed with karaoke; the obsession consisted of him singing Frank Sinatra at home for hours whilst looking at himself in the mirror. He took himself very seriously.

They always went on holiday to Cyprus and every evening, he'd put on a suit and drag his poor wife to all the karaoke bars so she could watch him "wow" the crowds.

I agree with a pp, offer a compromise here.

We had our honeymoon in Cyprus and had to listen to Frank Sinatra being belted out from our apartment every day. Maybe it was him and not a record on a loop Grin
Disfordarkchocolate · 02/11/2021 08:27

Hell no.

When he hosts he can hire a karaoke machine.

traka · 02/11/2021 08:32

He should have asked first if it was okay before booking

Sounds v cringe

Jamallama · 02/11/2021 08:34

Urgh. People catawauling on those things at the best of times is an assault on my eardrums.
Tell him he can have the karaoke machine with pleasure........in his own house!!
He sounds like a self absorbed idiot.

TrashyPanda · 02/11/2021 08:36

The idea of karaoke on Xmas Day is hideous.

He sounds incredibly self centred. What a weird thing to do.

Bancha · 02/11/2021 08:36

This has really made me laugh, sorry OP Grin

I mean clearly he’s a mad weirdo, and let’s hope, for everyone’s sake, that it doesn’t last with your sister.

You do sound like you’re being a bit extreme in saying you’d have to leave the house though. I reckon you could agree to a karaoke hour after dinner when you’ve all had some drinks so it’s less painful.

HollowTalk · 02/11/2021 08:39

@MrsTerryPratchett

You do sound a bit joyless. What's the issue with karaoke?
Other people's voices?
DrinkFeckArseBrick · 02/11/2021 08:40

This is so odd. I personally hate karaoke but I know some people love it. But even the people that love it surely recognise its decisive and that maybe not everyone will want it in their house on christmas day and would check with them first. It's like organising a skydive or something as a family activity, you've got to know everyone is into it before you book as it could be perceived as the best thing ever or a complete nightmare

HollowTalk · 02/11/2021 08:41

@SteveArnottsWaistcoat

Oh he is annoying. I bet he’s the sort of host who will just hog the mic himself pretending that no one is putting requests in, so that everyone has to hear him sing his country music songs. Actually Derek, Sheena put in her request to sing Turn Back Time about 45 minutes ago! Tosser.
This has made me laugh so much.
TravelLost · 02/11/2021 08:43

@Namechangedforthethousandthtim

He's tried to do a nice and fun thing and you've spoiled it by being controlling and a killjoy. It's not all about you? You could compromise.
Err… since when is it ok to plan something like that at someone else house without checking first that they are ok with it?!?

It’s her house. She doesn’t have to have anything she doesn’t want, regardless of whether someone else think it would be nice.

That’s true for some karaoke but also inviting other people, bringing a magician, a dog, whatever. You can’t be treating someone else house as your house.
If they really wanted the karaoke, they could proposed to host Christmas instead and they would have been welcomed to do whatever they wanted then.

WomanStanleyWoman · 02/11/2021 08:46

I love karaoke, but if I wanted a karaoke party, I’d host one. It’s bonkers to decide someone else WILL host one, whether they like it or not, on Christmas Day!

Even if the OP loved karaoke, I’d still think it was massively overstepping. You just don’t decide on the entertainment for someone else’s event.

TravelLost · 02/11/2021 08:46

Tbh i would have expected your sister to have had an inkling that yu wouldn’t be happy about it.

I’m wondering too what’s happening behind the scene.

northbacchus · 02/11/2021 08:47

I'd hate to be your neighbours! I'd need a lot of wine to deal with karaoke on Christmas day. Reminds me of that episode of Modern Family where they get the karaoke machine.

Could you maybe do a half hour/hour once you've had a chance for enough wine just to show willing? Even then you'd be being generous Hmm

WomanStanleyWoman · 02/11/2021 08:47

@Motnight

What do your parents think Op, after all it is their house?
OP said the sister and her boyfriend are staying with her parents. That doesn’t mean the parents are hosting.
10yearwarranty · 02/11/2021 08:49

This would be a great idea if he'd asked you first and everyone going enjoyed karaoke as well. As it was, it was a stupid and inconsiderate thing to do.
I don't know why people are posting saying they love karaoke, Op doesn't so that is hardly the point is it?

Thesearmsofmine · 02/11/2021 08:51

Lol YANBU

You could let him have it ib for an hour and get everyone else to hog itof Ethan hour so he doesn’t get a chance to -show off- sing.

altiara · 02/11/2021 08:53

YANBU! You don’t take an enormous karaoke machine to someone else’s house, and especially not so big that it can only fit in the hallway AND you ask first!