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Original poster

Is it not that common to be on your second marriage in your 30's

106 replies

whisperandrelax · 31/10/2021 16:38

I got married a few years ago when I was in my mid 30's, it is my second marriage. Is it not that common to marry for a second time in your 30's, none of my friend's have been in the same position as me.

OP posts:
stingofthebutterfly · 31/10/2021 18:07

@Pumpkinsonparade

Second marriage at 32.. Third at 38. Fourth at 44.
That's an achievement. I'm surprised you had time to get divorced between weddings.
Viviennemary · 31/10/2021 18:08

These days a lot of folk seem to be nearly in their 30s or older by the time they get round to getting married for the first time. So yes I think its pretty uncommon.

Ragwort · 31/10/2021 18:13

I married first at 23 and then divorced and was remarried at 30 ... I had an extremely small second wedding (5 guests) ... actually I had a very small first wedding too. My second marriage has lasted 33 years.

I remember a dinner party when I was 40ish ... of the six of us there only my DH was on his first marriage Grin.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 31/10/2021 18:14

An acquaintance of mine was on marriage number 3 by the time she hit 30 Hmm.

Me-I was married at 23 and still married at 36.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 31/10/2021 18:14

To the same person Grin

JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 31/10/2021 18:17

First time at 24; second time at 28; third time at 49.
The first one really shouldn't have happened.

JustFrigginNameChange · 31/10/2021 18:27

How are you lot all getting married so much?! It’s a mystery to me. I’m still waiting for my first and I’m 33 (Let me know your secrets!)

DottyHarmer · 31/10/2021 18:30

Someone I know just married a man who has four ex wives Shock .

I didn’t know how to arrange my face when she told me this.

SpeakingFranglais · 31/10/2021 18:33

I know two people, one who remarried in her early thirties (her first husband left her and she discovered he had got someone else pregnant and married her later, then did the same to wife 2)

She’s been remarried happily for years now.

The second, same circle, married mid thirties but had been in a LTR since her early 20s to early 30s before they split, so maybe not quite the same, but it would have been if her first partner had married her, but he was commitment phobic.

Daphnise · 31/10/2021 18:35

Those who are the divorcing types will have had four marriages by 50.
And at least two at 35.

SmileyClare · 31/10/2021 18:41

the divorcing types

How are you defining this type? That's a bit sneery. I actually think some people with multiple marriages are just hopeless romantics, others have just had bad luck or perhaps have the balls to end a marriage when it fails rather than live in misery.

LouLou789 · 31/10/2021 19:14

Amongst my peer group, I noticed there were a lot of separations from first DHs in late 30s and second marriages mid 40s, but that was a good few years ago

grannybiker · 31/10/2021 19:52

This is in my pile of "To be read" en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starter_marriage

Is it not that common to be on your second marriage in your 30's
Courtier · 31/10/2021 19:56

Not among my friends. We're all 26-35 and none of us has even been married once. Maybe we're just slow 😂

Mirrorxx · 31/10/2021 19:58

My DM married for the second time at 29 and is still married 30 years later

Alconleigh · 31/10/2021 19:58

I have a friend whose mother has been married 5 times. How in gods name can anyone say the vows with a straight face after the second, never mind the by the fifth?!

Bagelsandbrie · 31/10/2021 20:03

The thing is people can be so judgey about people getting divorced / married a few times and you really don’t know the circumstances. In my case my first ex and I were together for nearly 6 years and we were very happy until we had dd and then it all went downhill from there - I developed severe pnd, he turned abusive since all the attention wasn’t on him (something I’d never seem even a hint of before then), we basically just exploded overnight really and I left him when dd was 6 months old. I then met second dh when dd was about 2, we were together until she was about 6, married for 2 of those years until he found an ex he’d been with before me through Facebook and upped and left us in 2 weeks, never to be seen or heard of again (!), and then I was alone for a long while until I met now dh who I’ve been married to now for 15 years. I think I’ve just been unlucky. I’m generally a very loyal, sensible person. It’s not like I’m getting divorced and remarried every other month….

Courtier · 31/10/2021 20:05

@Alconleigh

I have a friend whose mother has been married 5 times. How in gods name can anyone say the vows with a straight face after the second, never mind the by the fifth?!
Bit harsh, people die, some people's partners become strangers to them
DivorceAdvicePlease123 · 31/10/2021 20:06

Oh come on, 5 times! That's a bit much!

Horst · 31/10/2021 20:25

I mean by marriage five unless they all died which would be suspicious then maybe they are the problem not the partners.

McJane · 31/10/2021 20:31

5 minutes research shows it's pretty unusual. I guess it depends on the circles you move in.

HalfCakeHalfBiscuit · 31/10/2021 20:36

@Pumpkinsonparade

Second marriage at 32.. Third at 38. Fourth at 44.
Are you Joan Collins?
MerryPumpkinmas · 31/10/2021 20:43

I think it's quite uncommon in that most people don't get married for the first time until their late 20s or 30s so to be on the second marriage in your 30s you would have had to have had a quite short first marriage and remarry quite quickly after the first one ended.

Jesusstolemyhotrod · 31/10/2021 20:47

Dh's boss got married for the 5th time at 60. Wife no 5 20 years younger.

userg5647 · 31/10/2021 20:49

I think I'm slightly unusual in that most people I know (as in weddings I've gone to) have largely married relatively young, mid 20s, myself included, and still going strong 10+ years later. I'm surprised none of us are yet divorced lol.