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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be convinced he was cheating on the basis of this?

102 replies

AaalrightyThen · 31/10/2021 12:54

Would the following make you suspicious?

My husband's working hours were such that he would be at home certain times of the week on his own until the kids come home from school. A local woman has a daughter who is friends with mine and whose daughter would be at my house every now and then.

She sent me a couple of texts over a few weeks mentioning she had been at my door while my husband was there and I was at work, with whatever reason (to ask about something happening in the street and something else I can't remember). It got my spidey senses tingling.

One day during my husband's normal days at home, he had to be at work for training. I came home early from work but didn't tell him. Lo and behold, this woman comes to the door. She seems to be acting a bit strangely (nervous chatter) and says she has lost her keys. I asked her if she wanted to come in, and she says no. So I asked her why had she come to the door then?! She realised, I think, that there would be no logical reason for her to come to my door with this strange 'lost keys' excuse if she didn't come in. So she came in, I made her a cup of tea, we chatted, and she leaves once she knows her daughter (with key) is on her way home.

On her way out the door she says something like 'oh is this not one of days at home?' I say oh not today. And off she goes.

To me, this woman was coming to the door expecting him to be in alone. Can't be many reasons why except the obvious, to my mind. Husband denies this strongly and can't think of any reason why this woman would have come to the door.

AIBU to think he had been having an affair with her while he had the house to himself?

OP posts:
SW1amp · 01/11/2021 07:04

No nothing in his phone
Her phone number not in it at all

How did you check for her number?
Did you look through his contacts to see if he has ‘Jane Smith’ saved?

Or did you type her actual number into the keypad and see if it was saved?

Because you really should do the latter and make sure it isn’t in there but saved as ‘Bob from work’ which is a common trick for covering up when men are up to no good - it means if a text comes through and you see it’s from Bob, it’s less suspicious than seeing it’s from Jane…

AcrossthePond55 · 01/11/2021 13:57

@AaalrightyThen

I don't know if my perception skills are much above average. It's just pretty obvious that you're unhappy.

Listen, I'm old and I've seen and done a lot. At this point the road ahead of me is a lot shorter than the road behind. And I can tell you that we only get one 'go round' on this wonderful Earth of ours and life is too precious and the years go too fast to spend it in unhappiness and discontent. Before you know it, you'll be my age looking back at your life. You don't want to look back and grieve 'shoulda, woulda, coulda'. Yes, staying is easy and divorce is hard. But happiness in 'hard' can be a lot better than misery in 'easy'.

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