To argue that this should is not a suitable topic for the Girl Guides

[MovedByFanciesThatAreCurled]

Girlguiding is for girls, aged 10-14. So why then do they feel the need to promote this on their social media?

This week is #AceWeek - a time to raise awareness and understanding of the asexual community. So here’s a shout-out to all of our asexual volunteers and members – thank you for everything you do in Girlguiding.

The reference to ‘members’ is quite clear. What on earth were they thinking in making reference to young girls’ sex lives (or lack of them according to the focus of the Tweet). How, as an organisation, have they strayed so far? I have two boys in the Scouts/Beavers and if this came up on either of their social media pages I would pull them out. Why is it seen to be an acceptable for Girlguiding?!!

[quote Franca123]@theoriginalemu this isn't a thing. You're just not attracted to anyone. What you describe doesn't get a special shiny label and a flag. It's fucking ridiculous. And children at Brownies don't need to bloody hear about it because it's boring as hell.[/quote]
Have you read the posts from those of us who are asexual? Those of us who went through years of our lives feeling as if we were broken or wrong? PPs have said that they slept with people they didn't want to because they wanted to force themselves to become heterosexual.

@Franca123

I just really fail to see how you can have a conversation about asexuality without wading into discussions on sexual activity. And what any of this adult labelling nonsense has to do with CHILDREN I have no idea.

Can you have a conversation about about heterosexuality without discussing sexual activity?

But that's only half of the label. Not being attracted to other people is only half. The other half is not engaging in sexual activity.

Can I ask where you read/learned about the second half of you definition?

The definition on AVEN is here www.asexuality.org/?q=overview.html

For some asexual people, arousal (sometimes interchanged with “libido” in asexual dialogue) is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner or partners. This could include, but is not limited to, arousal from hormone variation in a person’s menstrual cycle, or erections at certain times of the day. Some may occasionally masturbate, but feel no desire for partnered sex. Other asexual people may experience little or no arousal, often called non-libidoist asexuals. Both types are equally valid in identifying as asexual, as sexual orientation is about attraction and desire towards other people, rather than strictly physiological reactions.

Most asexual people have been asexual for our entire lives, although not all of us have been aware of the term or the community for as long as we’ve recognized this. Just as people will rarely unexpectedly go from being straight to gay, asexual people will rarely unexpectedly become sexual, or vice versa. Another minority of people in the asexual community may only think of themselves as asexual for a brief period of time while exploring and questioning their own sexuality, typically in younger years, when exploring their gender identity, or surrounding major shifts in interpersonal relationships.

It’s quite difficult to understand though, isn’t it?
Posters on this thread have outlined that
lack of sexual desire is ubiquitous BUT some people still get aroused and enjoy sex and are in loving relationships.

[quote Franca123]@theoriginalemu this isn't a thing. You're just not attracted to anyone. What you describe doesn't get a special shiny label and a flag. It's fucking ridiculous. And children at Brownies don't need to bloody hear about it because it's boring as hell.[/quote]
well since their responsible parents will require children to reach the requisite age of thirteen before having a twitter account, brownies (max age 10) won't hear about it, will they?

I think that’s a very positive post. My daughter is asexual and as a teen felt very isolated by it never being talked about; she thought she was weird and abnormal! It’s when things are hidden that they seem grubby, asexuality should be as known about /accepted as all other sexualities. Also, I think it’s very important that children become aware that they do not have to shoehorn themselves in to behaviours they see from peers that are not right for them, it’s okay to be asexual. Guides and Scouts have a difficult road to traverse as there are prepubescent, pubescent and post pubescent members, yes my daughter didn’t know she was asexual at 10 but it would have been nice for her to know it’s not a bad thing to be!

@nolongersurprised

That kind of conversation should be something you can openly say without it being a big thing, or people thinking it’s weird

You can’t control whether people think it’s weird though. To me, the concept of enjoying sex with someone I have no physical attraction to is very weird.

As if relates to consenting adults I don’t care. I don’t actually care that much about people’s personal lives at work either. I do care that anxious teens are prematurely deciding they’re ace and normalising sex with people they do t desire though

It’s the direct opposite of enthusiastic consent isn’t it?

Can people please stop going on about responsible parents and social media.

Safeguarding works from the place of ‘what’s the worst that could happen’ and then takes steps to prevent that. If schools/social services etc relied on parents to be responsible they wouldn’t need many of the safeguards they have in place. Some parents won’t be responsible, doesn’t mean that’s licence for any organisation that works with children, especially girls, to throw out safeguards though. They have to assume parents won’t be responsible and work from their in their safeguarding.

There’s no definition of asexuality in law. So any definition of it is open to interpretation. There’s already a variety of definitions on this thread from ACE posters.

The d of e pshe guidance was rewritten precisely to get a certain organisation out of schools. That organisation had a big influence in definitions of the lgbt+ alphabet (the ones after the lgb) and definitions influenced by that organisation should most definitely not be influencing kids if the d of e had to get them out of schools and away from kids.

So there’s no way anyone can assert their definition is the right one. Judging by some explanations here I’m asexual, but I’m definitely straight imho. And I’m not looking to make that sound like something it’s not. Children do not need confused with definitions adults can’t be clear on.

They aren't left for parents because 95% of the posts on here have misrepresented asexuality and don't know what they're talking about

And stonewall does?

The organisation who think 2 males can he in a lesbian relationship and misrepresent the law to employers and tell schools they can change their child's name and sex markers on the paperwork behind parents backs, can suddenly be trusted to give an age appropriate, accurate description of asexuality?

By having that tweet they are ensuring it is a topic that will come up in units
How's that? I run Brownies and don't even have twitter so I've never ensured that a topic raised on twitter had been talked about in unit.

Don't see how this is any different to a post saying "thanks to our homosexual volunteers and members".

Is hardly encouraging the young members to try hard core porn or have a sex change.

@DockOTheBay

Don't see how this is any different to a post saying "thanks to our homosexual volunteers and members".

Is hardly encouraging the young members to try hard core porn or have a sex change.

Why can’t they just say that’s to all out volunteers or thanks to our diverse volunteers?

Why does sexuality need brought into a kids group, outside of something like equality policy that ensures no one discriminates against people’s sexuality.

It's a tweet fgs! That is not to imply that they are teaching about it at all. They're just acknowledging their asexual staff and members (which includes mbers 14+) in one single tweet. The hysteria! If there are any 10 year olds keeping a close eye on GG twitter feed I'll eat my hat. Its hardly a dirty word anyway. Some people fancy girls, some people fancy boys, some people don't fancy anyone. Job done. They're not sexual beings at 10 but most will certainly know what a crush is.

@NoSquirrels

In the context of Girlguiding I don’t think it’s appropriate to bring sex and sexuality up as a ‘taught’ or featured topic.

I don’t think it is a ‘taught’ or featured topic - is it?

No, its not. I don't know why OP has jumped from one tweet mentioning that asexuality exists, to "they're teaching 10 year olds about asexuality!"

Its never just a tweet.

Gg have already changed their policies to allow males to share tents and showers with girls without parents knowing.

The "training" goes so much deeper than " just a tweet"

Fucks sake, I feel so sorry for young girls these days. When I went to Brownies and Girl Guides we played rounders and tag, went on nature hunts and camping, learned about the world and the lives of girls in other countries. It was a safe place where as pubescent and pre pubescent girls we didn't have to think about sex, who we would or wouldn't be having it with, how often and how we'd be having it.

We we lucky to not have to start thinking about that until we were at a point when it was relevant to us, and no I didn't suffer because of it and yes I did learn that not wanting to have sex or not feeling sexual towards other people is perfectly normal too.

Kids these days younger and younger are being encouraged to explore their sexuality and label it at an age when they don't yet fully understand it and the question I have to ask myself is. Who benefits?

@EdenFlower

YANBU People don't send their children to Guides to learn about sexuality. Surely guides is all about learning practical skills, socialising and making friends. Why does everything have to be made so explicit and put into little boxes?

🤦‍♀️ they aren't learning about asexuality at Guides. Their social media mentions it once, in reference to members, who can be any age.

I am much more worried about the FB post than the tweet (it's NOT just a tweet) as it not surprisingly attracted loads of replies from adult leaders sharing their sexuality where young girls can see (and even if sticking to the rules 13 is young).
They were all also doubling down on "this is FINE to share" "of course our safeguarding training is great" etc etc.

Why does sexuality need brought into a kids group
ITS NOT. I don't know how many times the same thing can be said. No "kids groups" are talking about this. There is no discussion about it in Brownies or Guides groups. Its one post on SM.

@TheWeeDonkey

Fucks sake, I feel so sorry for young girls these days. When I went to Brownies and Girl Guides we played rounders and tag, went on nature hunts and camping, learned about the world and the lives of girls in other countries. It was a safe place where as pubescent and pre pubescent girls we didn't have to think about sex, who we would or wouldn't be having it with, how often and how we'd be having it.

We we lucky to not have to start thinking about that until we were at a point when it was relevant to us, and no I didn't suffer because of it and yes I did learn that not wanting to have sex or not feeling sexual towards other people is perfectly normal too.

Kids these days younger and younger are being encouraged to explore their sexuality and label it at an age when they don't yet fully understand it and the question I have to ask myself is. Who benefits?

When I went to Brownies I was being sexually abused by a neighbour but because nobody ever talked about sex or sexuality and consent etc it took me four years to tell anyone. Stick your fake concern up your arse.

@DockOTheBay

Why does sexuality need brought into a kids group ITS NOT. I don't know how many times the same thing can be said. No "kids groups" are talking about this. There is no discussion about it in Brownies or Guides groups. Its one post on SM.

No it’s not, it’s fb too.

I knew I was gay when I was a Girl Guide in the 90s. Other girls spoke about their boyfriends or who they fancied at school quite a lot. I pretended to fancy boys to fit in (the only place that would wash, because I didn't go to the same school as anyone in my troop so they never saw me interact with boys).

We also played tag, wove friendship bracelets, learned dances and other kid stuff.

I am much more worried about the FB post than the tweet (it's NOT just a tweet) as it not surprisingly attracted loads of replies from adult leaders sharing their sexuality where young girls can see (and even if sticking to the rules 13 is young).

And why isn't it ok to share? What's wrong with the 13+ year olds knowing that some of their leaders are gay/bi/lesbian?

You know, when I was 8, my mum's friend came over with their boyfriend. They kissed in front of me and she told me they were gay. Am I supposed to be scarred for life?

Well teaching kids about consent and boundaries and teaching them to label their sexuality before they have sexual feelings are two separate things as I'm sure you well know. I'm really sorry that happened to you but how does teaching kids that some people have sex with people they're not attracted and thats okay would have helped you in your situation?

I was also a part of an LGBT+ youth group when I was 13-17 years old, and surrounded by the gays - I guess my mum needs putting in the stocks for that one!