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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Postman smashing on door and shouting

447 replies

OttilieStonelady · 19/10/2021 11:12

I live in a house with other people. Someone else had something sent to them by a family member so neither of us knew it was arriving. He's not in. Postman came to door to drop off. Saw me upstairs and I swear was banging on my door for 5 minutes so hard it sounded like he was going to break in. Rang the door over and over and over banging in-between. He disappeared, I guess delivered neighbours post then came back and banged on my door again, then next again, then back to me again. He even shouted 'i can see you'. I can't leave when I'm in the middle of presenting to people, especially not senior management, presenting extremely sensitive data. It's not a big house so he would've known I'd have heard him. WIBU not to open the door? Was he BU to keep banging aggressively on my door? All round a weird experience.

OP posts:
Biancadelrioisback · 19/10/2021 14:01

Over lockdown 1 I had the window cleaner bang on the window to get my attention once to let me know there was a dead bird in my garden while I was on a video call.

Fortunately my boss saw the funny side but if it had of been a meeting with a client I would have been in trouble.

I'm not going to lie though, I have literally never considered putting a sign on the front door though when I'm in a meeting and I've been WFH for close to 2 years now

butterpuffed · 19/10/2021 14:04

As you were at the window why didn't you open it and call out 'On a Zoom meeting, please put a card through the door' Would've taken a couple of seconds.

SpiceRat · 19/10/2021 14:06

I surprised half of you even have jobs since you’re can’t even fucking read the OP properly.

DPotter · 19/10/2021 14:06

I've had similar - when on loo. Nothing I can do about it as nature has to take its course. It's at times like these when I'd like a gadget which flashes up a little sign by the bell -"I'm having a crap so can't come to the door".

Maybe I should suggest this as an upgrade for the Ring bells everyone raves about.....

LaBellina · 19/10/2021 14:09

If someone was that agressive (coming back after dropping the parcel at neighbors and shouting ‘I can see you’) it’s not about delivering the package anymore, it’s about intimidating you and possibly taking out work related frustration/stress out on an easy target, a woman alone in her home. I can’t believe that people are defending this behavior, from a certain point on this had nothing anymore with wanting to deliver a package. He was bang out of order and I would definitely complain. I also would be hesitant to open the door for this person in the future, I would feel scared if someone had shown me this behavior on an earlier occasion.

Anonymice1 · 19/10/2021 14:09

outofservice
So your job is more important than the postie trying to do theirs??

Let me guess, you don’t work.

outofservice · 19/10/2021 14:11

@Tal45 not defending, I just thought rather than listen to someone bang on your door for 5 minutes, it would have been less disturbing to answer the door.
FWIW, I have learned a lot about people working from home. In my experience they always wear headsets so I never know if I’ve been heard. I’m more of a knock, count slowly to 20, knock slightly louder whilst filling out a red card type worker but we are given 3 minutes to deliver each item.
The OP has every right to and should complain about this man. (I would personally find the local delivery office number rather the the generic 0345 one to make sure it is dealt with)

Biancadelrioisback · 19/10/2021 14:11

@butterpuffed

As you were at the window why didn't you open it and call out 'On a Zoom meeting, please put a card through the door' Would've taken a couple of seconds.
She Was Giving A Presentation

If she wasn't able to get up and go to the door, do you really think she was able to bellow out of a window?

outofservice · 19/10/2021 14:12

@Anonymice1 as I said earlier, I am a postie

jetadore · 19/10/2021 14:13

@outofservice

So your job is more important than the postie trying to do theirs??
Good grief, can’t speak for OP but, yes, doing my job is more important to me than other people doing theirs.
jetadore · 19/10/2021 14:13

Also I’d be calling the sorting office to complain

EspressoDoubleShot · 19/10/2021 14:17

@outofservice

Weird not to answer the door to somebody who is busy trying to do their job. Am sure a quick excuse me to your very important colleagues would have been less distracting than listening to someone aggressively banging on your door for 5 whole minutes.
Don’t be daft, you don’t interrupt a presentation. It’s unprofessional and breaks the momentum
butterpuffed · 19/10/2021 14:18

butterpuffed

As you were at the window why didn't you open it and call out 'On a Zoom meeting, please put a card through the door' Would've taken a couple of seconds.

She
Was
Giving
A
Presentation

If she wasn't able to get up and go to the door, do you really think she was able to bellow out of a window?

Obviously I do or I wouldn't have posted. A couple of seconds wouldn't have interrupted the meeting

EspressoDoubleShot · 19/10/2021 14:25

Clearly your meetings aren’t overly professional that you can interrupt to holler out a window

outofservice · 19/10/2021 14:28

@jetadore exactly!

Biancadelrioisback · 19/10/2021 14:29

@butterpuffed

butterpuffed

As you were at the window why didn't you open it and call out 'On a Zoom meeting, please put a card through the door' Would've taken a couple of seconds.

She
Was
Giving
A
Presentation

If she wasn't able to get up and go to the door, do you really think she was able to bellow out of a window?

Obviously I do or I wouldn't have posted. A couple of seconds wouldn't have interrupted the meeting

Obviously I do or I wouldn't have posted. A couple of seconds wouldn't have interrupted the meeting

Well it does interrupt meetings when you suddenly stop presenting to shout out of a window. I'm very confused how you can think that it doesn't?
Do you do that in the office too? Shout out of the windows at the postie or suddenly stop presenting to senior team members to shout at someone about something completely unrelated? Can't be the most professional environment then.

mafted · 19/10/2021 14:31

I assumed the meeting was already interrupted because the OP was distracted. Perhaps this wasn't the case though.

skodadoda · 19/10/2021 14:34

@AnotherMansCause

I'd be having words with the housemate who was expecting the parcel. If they knew they weren't going to be in, they should have rearranged delivery.
Royal Mail don’t necessarily give you a specific delivery day.
8dpwoah · 19/10/2021 14:35

@outofservice

So your job is more important than the postie trying to do theirs??
But the postie has a mechanism for getting on with their job, i.e. try to deliver, can't, leave a card, carry on with round, then it's the recipient's problem to sort?
Dogscanteatonions · 19/10/2021 14:38

I actually don't think it matters that OP was giving a presentation, you can choose not to open the door to the postie for any reason you like - you're not obliged to open the door. If there is no answer they card you and you then have to pick up from the delivery office or rearrange delivery. It's a standard procedure.

I don't open the door if I'm in the shower or on the loo or in the middle of a very complex job for example.

That's my choice and my lookout to then have to go pick up a delivery.

I would complain.

Rayna37 · 19/10/2021 14:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DunderMifflinSalesRep · 19/10/2021 14:41

So many weird responses on this thread.

I get it OP. I work in Adult Safeguarding. I have case conferences on Teams. I can't say to Sally whose husband has beaten the crap out of her "oh sorry, can you just pause telling me about what happened whilst I get my Amazon order from the post man" Hmm

If you'd have been working in the office, then no one would be there to open the door and working from home should be treated the same.

I would actually make a complaint in your shoes. His aggression was completely unnecessary.

StormTreader · 19/10/2021 14:41

I feel like if the OP had posted saying "my husband was giving an important business presentation", there wouldn't be nearly as many people saying he should have interrupted it to answer the door.

There's still a fair bit of unconscious assumption in our society that a woman at home is on-call for various household chores and admin even if she's WFH.

rainbowmash · 19/10/2021 14:47

In This Thread: lots of SAHMs with some extremely reliable opinions about how to conduct themselves during a work presentation.

OhPatti · 19/10/2021 14:48

@outofservice

Weird not to answer the door to somebody who is busy trying to do their job. Am sure a quick excuse me to your very important colleagues would have been less distracting than listening to someone aggressively banging on your door for 5 whole minutes.
But you're quite happy for the OP to interrupt herself in trying to do her own job? Interesting.

The postman was bang out of order and I'd be complaining about him personally. Just because someone is at home does not mean they are obliged to answer the door - especially now so many more homes are doubling up as workplaces.