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AIBU?

Postman smashing on door and shouting

447 replies

OttilieStonelady · 19/10/2021 11:12

I live in a house with other people. Someone else had something sent to them by a family member so neither of us knew it was arriving. He's not in. Postman came to door to drop off. Saw me upstairs and I swear was banging on my door for 5 minutes so hard it sounded like he was going to break in. Rang the door over and over and over banging in-between. He disappeared, I guess delivered neighbours post then came back and banged on my door again, then next again, then back to me again. He even shouted 'i can see you'. I can't leave when I'm in the middle of presenting to people, especially not senior management, presenting extremely sensitive data. It's not a big house so he would've known I'd have heard him. WIBU not to open the door? Was he BU to keep banging aggressively on my door? All round a weird experience.

OP posts:
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Oswina · 24/10/2021 17:10

I wouldn't find it unprofessional for someone to answer the door to quickly grab a parcel on a video presentation. Is not a common thing and would take 2 mins. Do people really get annoyed by that? Confused

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NotMyCat · 24/10/2021 17:15

@Oswina

I wouldn't find it unprofessional for someone to answer the door to quickly grab a parcel on a video presentation. Is not a common thing and would take 2 mins. Do people really get annoyed by that? Confused

Depends on the job. I will be on a call with a customer so I can't leave my desk
My postman knows though so he just buzzes once then tries the other neighbours. TBH we usually leave the main apartment block door open around the time he arrives
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Oswina · 24/10/2021 17:20

I've just wondered- people who work full-time and are only home after post has been delivered, nobody else at home... How do you get your parcels if you don't have a safe space or neighbour to leave them with? Presumably you'd have to keep getting a redelivery but the redelivery would also be when you're not in, so you'd have to give up your Saturday if not working, Sunday is a no-go... Get them delivered to local shop that is open late? Always get them from the depot?

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MRex · 24/10/2021 17:23

@Oswina

I wouldn't find it unprofessional for someone to answer the door to quickly grab a parcel on a video presentation. Is not a common thing and would take 2 mins. Do people really get annoyed by that? Confused

There have been a huge number of posts explaining all the varied jobs people have where this doesn't work; presenting / training / teaching large groups, talking to vulnerable people, time-assessed activity like call centre roles, interviews, recorded item that won't be edited etc etc etc. Sometimes people working from home can answer the door and sometimes they can't, just like how sometimes people at home but not working can answer the door and sometimes they can't. And even if someone doesn't answer the door because they simply don't want to, that's ok too because they're in their own home and have a right to privacy; that's been explained too.
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MRex · 24/10/2021 17:28

@Oswina

I've just wondered- people who work full-time and are only home after post has been delivered, nobody else at home... How do you get your parcels if you don't have a safe space or neighbour to leave them with? Presumably you'd have to keep getting a redelivery but the redelivery would also be when you're not in, so you'd have to give up your Saturday if not working, Sunday is a no-go... Get them delivered to local shop that is open late? Always get them from the depot?

Usually get irritated that the delivery driver ignored instructions to leave with a neighbour or take back, because they'll have left it in full view of doorstep thieves.
In those rare occasions it's taken back; get a delivery to work, or get a delivery for a day at home (including Saturday), or go and pick it up on the Saturday / other day at home (takes 20 min if you go early), or have it put in the Amazon drop box at the garage. Loads of options that aren't a bother.
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VanGoghsDog · 24/10/2021 17:45

@Oswina

I wouldn't find it unprofessional for someone to answer the door to quickly grab a parcel on a video presentation. Is not a common thing and would take 2 mins. Do people really get annoyed by that? Confused

Not all jobs are "video presentations".

What if you were on the phone having, say, bereavement counselling and just as you were pouring your heart out the counselor said "hold that thought, just got to go and answer the door".

Also, it's not ajways quick. Sometimes you have to sign, they want you to stand while they take a photo, the thing is awkward to handle, it's not actually for you and they're asking if you know if your neighbor is in......
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Oswina · 24/10/2021 18:25

Not all jobs are "video presentations".

What if you were on the phone having, say, bereavement counselling and just as you were pouring your heart out the counselor said "hold that thought, just got to go and answer the door".

The OP said a presentation, not counselling, and I also said a presentation. I don't think anybody would think doing it during a therapy session would be OK.

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TirednWorried · 24/10/2021 18:40

I am surprised at you presenting extremely sensitive information in a shared house.
I think yu were rude and people understand when you work from home, you do sometimes have to do domestic things especially when you sare a house with others.

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Viviennemary · 24/10/2021 19:16

Smashing on the door Thats a bit overdramatic. Presumably he didn't batter your door down with a battering ram. I expect you would still be carrying on with your important call though.

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Tailendofsummer · 24/10/2021 19:20

I got a delivery today (not Royal Mail) from a man who must have banged on the door with his fist to make the noise he made. We have a bloody ring doorbell, why couldn't he press that?

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Tailendofsummer · 24/10/2021 19:22

So I can quite believe the Op's comment about smashing!
No one should ever have to answer the door except to emergency services. My 14 year old might be visible in the house but he is not allowed to answer the door (he would not be able to deal with the cold calling/chuggers we get around here and I don't want anyone for that matter knowing he is home alone).

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acatcalledjohn · 24/10/2021 22:06

@TirednWorried

I am surprised at you presenting extremely sensitive information in a shared house.
I think yu were rude and people understand when you work from home, you do sometimes have to do domestic things especially when you sare a house with others.


Not everyone has the luxury of a home office despite having an employer who's cancelled the lease on office space.

Is that really so hard to imagine?
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MRex · 24/10/2021 22:11

I am surprised at you presenting extremely sensitive information in a shared house.
You don't know the nature of the sensitivity, it's only up to OP and her employers to concern themselves with security as far as is necessary.
I think yu were rude
It's been explained so many times, OP was working and unavailable to get the door. That isn't being any more rude than people going out for the day when an unexpected parcel arrives.
and people understand when you work from home, you do sometimes have to do domestic things
No, nobody does, this makes no sense at all. If you're actually working then you aren't available for domestic things.
especially when you sare a house with others.
Others sharing a house have nothing to do with what OP does at work. Again, your comment makes no sense.

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VestaTilley · 24/10/2021 22:54

I’d be asking your housemate to ensure they’re in for a delivery, and I’d complain to Royal Mail- just make sure they don’t blame it on your nice postie if this one isn’t your usual one.

I don’t blame you for being angry; I would’ve been to, and I wouldn’t have answered the door to a man in that state, even if I hadn’t been presenting!

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2Two · 24/10/2021 23:58

@TirednWorried

I am surprised at you presenting extremely sensitive information in a shared house.
I think yu were rude and people understand when you work from home, you do sometimes have to do domestic things especially when you sare a house with others.

What choice does she have if she has to work from home? Presumably, given that she knows more about her work than you do, she has taken whatever precautions are necessary - the mere fact that she shares a house doesn't automatically mean that her flatmates are gathered around her door earwigging as much as they can.

No, people attending important conferences don't understand that you sometimes "have to do domestic things" mid conference - and, in fact, OP wasn't under any such compulsion.
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Skysblue · 25/10/2021 00:22

Yanbu.

When dd was a baby napping I used to put a sign on door saying do not knock we are skeeping and will not answer. Maybe a similar sign saying you are in middle of work presentation and itnis impossible to come to door?

Round here all thenpostmen just dump the parcel on the step and drive off 🤷‍♀️

I would never answer the door to someone who was screaming “I can see you.” in a scary irrational manner. I’d be too scared of them!!

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JauntyJinty · 26/10/2021 16:38

@Oswina

Not all jobs are "video presentations".

What if you were on the phone having, say, bereavement counselling and just as you were pouring your heart out the counselor said "hold that thought, just got to go and answer the door".

The OP said a presentation, not counselling, and I also said a presentation. I don't think anybody would think doing it during a therapy session would be OK.

But the delivery person didn't know that...so shouldn't have followed their procedure for an unaswerwed door rather than continne to knock and shout?
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TirednWorried · 31/10/2021 00:44

What is smashing on the door?what did he actually smash? I guess you mean knocking but thought smashing would be more emotive?

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steff13 · 31/10/2021 00:50

@Oswina

I wouldn't find it unprofessional for someone to answer the door to quickly grab a parcel on a video presentation. Is not a common thing and would take 2 mins. Do people really get annoyed by that? Confused

It's almost like everyone's job and employer is different. So weird.
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browneyes77 · 31/10/2021 08:11

@TirednWorried

What is smashing on the door?what did he actually smash? I guess you mean knocking but thought smashing would be more emotive?

I’m guessing if the he’d just politely ‘knocked’ the door, the OP wouldn’t have felt a need to write a post about his behaviour.

So I’d say smashing the door meant he was banging really hard on the door. Not that difficult to understand really, unless you’re purposely trying to be obtuse
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IWishToAnswerInTheAffirmative · 31/10/2021 10:00

Wtf even is this thread?! Of COURSE the OP isn’t being unreasonable. I never complain about anything but I’d be complaining about this arsehole.

She sheer bitterness and jealousy about people who work from home is quite something.

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Cherrysoup · 31/10/2021 10:51

[quote outofservice]@youvegottenminuteslynn oh absolutely, as noted twice already in this thread. Next time I’m stood at your door, noting the cosy glow of lights being on and someone home rather than no one in (just the telly left on for the dog) I’ll absolutely knock a bit quieter imagining you WFH, a superhero in your cape and loungewear, not answering the door due to giving their presentation to 500 students on how to save the world from rapists, child offenders and murderers, before quietly writing a P739 and slipping away without disturbing you.
I may even put a note in our works suggestion box.[/quote]
You’ve lost a lot of sympathy now. Shame, you were doing quite well earlier.

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