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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend blocked us for paying her pay

130 replies

Lettingoffstea · 18/10/2021 16:59

Group of four friends for about four years go out for lunch every 2 weeks. We tend to go to the same place cheap and cheerful. Noticed in the last year one friend had never got any money or left her card at home. Takes money from another friend never pays it back. This friend is not strapped for cash she is always buying new clothes, cigarettes and booze for herself to drink at home. We said it is your turn to pay last time we went out. She paid but now had blocked us all. Sorry txt is so long but not sure how to deal with this any help please

OP posts:
Smackthepony · 18/10/2021 18:58

She’s done you a favour! Be grateful.

saraclara · 18/10/2021 19:00

When you asked her to pay on the most recent occasion, how did she react? You said that she paid, but did she do it without fuss, or did she complain/resist?

Cheeseontoastwithchopsauce · 18/10/2021 19:00

In fact it's a bit of a non event
She scrounged, you all got wise to the fact and she's pissed off into the ether....
It all ends rather well in my opinion

VividImaginationAgain · 18/10/2021 19:11

So, to recap, you are now a group of three friends who go out for lunch and each pay your own. Sounds good to me!

forrestgreen · 18/10/2021 19:14

Well she solved the problem herself

Original poster
Lettingoffstea · 18/10/2021 19:14

When one of our group of friends said it is your round she sat for a while then went to the bar and got three drinks (pensioner friend did not want one, I had a soft drink I was driving as usual ) Next day we all had an abusive txt saying we all know that she did not have any money to pay for drinks) her meal and first round was paid for by one of the group. Then we were blocked. Thank you for opening our eyes that we had closed for so long. We will not answer if she unblocks us. We are all done. Thank you for alk the advice we should have woken up a lot earlier

OP posts:
AmyDudley · 18/10/2021 19:18

So she wasn't even asked to pay for her meal - just two drinks essentially - one alcoholic and one soft ?
She sounds beyond redemption, what a cheapskate.

OverByYer · 18/10/2021 19:18

What a CFer. Good riddance to bad rubbish

FangsForTheMemory · 18/10/2021 19:22

you've outlived your usefulness so she's moved on

gobbynorthernbird · 18/10/2021 19:24

@mountbattenbergcake

Who on earth are the 14 people who voted YABU? Confused

Well done for speaking up, CFs hate being exposed.

I voted OP was U as it seemed like OP still wanted to be friends with this cheeky beggar.
BarefootHippieChick · 18/10/2021 19:26

Who on earth are the 14 people who voted YABU?

14 other freeloaders

FinallyFluid · 18/10/2021 19:35

I used to work with someone like this, he would come out with the group, always order steak, always leave before the bill came and never pay his share.

After about a year we all got fed up with this, we were in our twenties so none of us were flush.

We went to a local restaurant, when the waitress arrived we ordered starters, main courses and desserts all at once. Made her life easy.

It was like synchronised swimming, as soon as the last person had finished their main course, we all stood up walked out to the pub and said over to you mate.

He then, went to the MD to complain the following day,(his PA was out with us and earwigging and had already tipped the MD off) the MD said I had you down for tighter than tight, but I didn't have you down for stupid as well, suck it up.

UnsuitableHat · 18/10/2021 19:38

Probably would’ve been better to have spoken to her about this before rather than just announce she’s paying for the whole thing. She may feel a bit ganged up on? Not that she’s in the right.

Darkdarknights · 18/10/2021 19:38

So she goes out for a meal and drinks every fortnight and never pays!

Gilly12345 · 18/10/2021 19:44

She is a freeloader and no friend, you are all well rid.

Wake up and smell the coffee.

QueenBee52 · 19/10/2021 02:09

What a piece of work she is... She must be furious to have been discovered syphoning meals and drinks from the 'pensioner' friend... nasty woman 🌸

LaBellina · 19/10/2021 02:11

I’d say the trash took itself out…she can’t use you anymore to pay her way so she has discarded you as a form of very petty revenge. You didn’t lose a friend here, you got rid of a freeloader.

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/10/2021 02:44

Of course she was good company. You were paying her for the service of being good company (even though there was no official contract) and she was willing to oblige. She stopped being willing the moment you both concluded she was freeloading. She’ll now be onto the next lot of victims. Or more likely you aren’t the only ones she’s manipulated into funding her life.

TasteTheMeatNotTheHeat · 19/10/2021 02:48

There's nothing to deal with.

She's a selfish twat, and she was unable to pay her way without throwing a tantrum. She probably thinks you're all awful for even suggesting that it might be her turn to put her hand in her pocket.

You're all better off without her.

Torvean · 19/10/2021 02:54

Some ppl is life are users. Your friend sound like that. Been there, had it happen, won't be fooled twice though.
Her blocking you shows her real attitude.
The 3 of you will have a better time without her.

GiantHaystacks2021 · 19/10/2021 03:11

The trash took itself out.
CF, you're better off without her.

mathanxiety · 19/10/2021 03:27

She's done you all a favour.

Reallyimeanreally2022 · 19/10/2021 04:41

Every fortnight
For 4 years who have gone out for this woman

That is a close friendship. A very close friendship.

And yet you seem to despise her. Baffling

Aphrodite31 · 19/10/2021 04:44

Did you make her pay for all of you? I don't understand.

So what happened every other fortnight? You all paid for her?

SaltySheepdog · 19/10/2021 05:08

If she has no cash it’s best to do cheap nights together - film, nuts, glass of wine.

Very unfair to freeload of others

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