To never speak to her again- CF!

[Peanutbuttermandms]

I have a long term school ‘friend’, let’s call her S. I hear from her very sporadically and most recently, when she wants something: sponsorship money from me for one of her ‘challenges’ to stay in my central city home (!)… but folks, I give you the best one to date today…

Text out of the blue.. not even a ‘how are you’.. can I pick her son up from the airport (!) on Wednesday as he’s flying in alone (he is 10) from his dad’s abroad. You’re thinking wtaf, right?

The text goes on.. she can’t and her new DP are holidaying in the south of France and their flight doesn’t get in to airport until 5pm.. so the wee mite is alone for 4 hours after travelling alone. At 10. Jesus!

It ends ‘would obviously be great to see you too!!’

AIBU to think cheeky fucker and never speak to the self centred cow again?

Block her before she can send you any details.

@CatandFiddleForestGin I know! I’m curious to understand how the pp came to that conclusion and would like to understand the logic. Easy to make a baseless accusation which is derisive, not so easy when you’re called out on it.

Reply and say THIS DOESN'T WORK FOR ME

@Chloemol

In this case, as a child is involved, I would pick up the child

I would hate for the child to be stuck at the airport on his own

But I would, once she has collected, be letting her have it both guns blazing, and would tell her to no longer contact you

I second this.

Firstly - because I've been that 10 year old child regularly left standing in various places freezing , unsafe, cold and hungry for hours on end as my mum was too busy/ forgot to pick me up. It's horrible.

Secondly - because whenever I know the poor child was out of earshot I'd want to see her face as I gave her both barrels and tell her to delete my number.
Good luck xx

@BoredZelda that’s completely different circumstances - they aren’t like for like and aren’t comparable. Also, the mother called with genuine remorse. Each situation on its own merit. If I were asked in these circumstances would I have responded differently? Absolutely!

@Lostmarbles2021

A 10 year old flying in on his own? Is that normal? I have a DC that age. Only just let them go out to call for friends on their own. I’m a bit concerned that this child isn’t well enough looked after if she hadn’t organised herself enough to get to the airport herself or have someone already there is this neglect? Middle class/rich person neglect? I’m not sure, but it’s not sitting comfortably with me.

CF for sure. Not your responsibility. Let her know though so the poor kid gets met by someone, hopefully.

I cant think that any airlines that fly unaccompanied 10 year olds at the moment. The numbers that do were in rapid decline before Cv19 and they used the pandemic as a reason to stop.

I understand your perspective OP and no reply from you should speak volumes to her, but she is very clearly a CF so who knows what she will make of it. But whatever she makes of it, this is her DS (poor lad) and not your responsibility whatsoever.

I do think like other PP’s you will probably get a ? follow up text soon as she scrambles to try and find someone to do her job for her. But I’m sure you will stand firm if so.

As an aside and purely because I am wondering about the poor child. Do you know if his Dad is at least a good and responsible parent? I hope he is. Her behaviour makes me feel sorry for her DS 😢

Just checked. No airlines fly 10 year olds. The youngest unaccompanied age is 12.

If nobody appears to collect the kid, the airline will look after them safely - and probably call social services.

I'd be tempted to 'have a new number' for when the 'mother' phones, raging that she's just had a call from a social worker. Either than or, depending upon how annoyed I was feeling, tell the airline when they call (if she's assumed it will be fine and has given them your number without consent), that it's all news to you and you can't do it anyhow.

It is beyond cheeky, irresponsible etc. and not your issue or problem. however there is a 10 year old child with a parent with a cavalier attitude to their safety. Please give a quick and definite no response for the sake of that child. I would have no more contact after that. If this was a different socio economic group, social services would be heavily involved.

I think I would reply and say no, mainly because I wouldn’t want the hassle of phone calls from the son or the airport or whoever thinks you’re picking up the child. I’d find it easier to say no now than to explain the situation later. Although I suppose there’s always a chance you say no and she gives everyone your details anyway.

OP,

Your decision not to respond is perfectly reasonable.

Considering the care airlines appear to take with handing of minors over, I think now, not engaging is probably best.

This has nothing to do with you and you certainly do not have any obligation to reply if you don't wish to.

She is in for some reaction if she doesn't arrange someone to collect him, and I certainly hope any parent who would do what she has done, does have social services involved.

I certainly wouldn't want to be in any involved with someone so cavalier with their child arrangements.

Anyone can phone me and relay information they’ve been told. I can confirm it was without my consent and if it has implications, obtained dishonestly from the mother. It’s no biggie at my end. As I’ve said before, it’s her lookout.

I acknowledge it’s hellish that the son is being used as collateral but it’s frankly something I’m not prepared involve myself in, or indulge.

Think you are very right to not even respond. She is a rude person and. CF.

Actually, I would probably do as @Yaya26 and previous posters suggested. I would pick up the child. I would also contact social services. It’s actually pretty appalling.

Oh and if this thread makes the tabloids the CF will have a clear answer. A win for all the poster's who think OP should reply.
No response is perfectly reasonable in my view BTW.

Many airlines have unaccompanied minor programs and mine have been flying UM since they were 5. There's no chance they would just dump a 10 year old in the middle of the airport, they will wait for an authorised person or there will be protocols in place to take care of children if that person doesn't show up.

“Hi sorry you’ve got the wrong number”

Well if its true airlines wont let a 10 year old fly alone, theres something wrong with this story

The unaccompanied policy is her look out, not mine. In fact, I’m devoid of any legal responsibility whatsoever.

Trouble is with people like this mother, they’re never in the wrong.

I do not see how texting her back with a simple and emphatic NO and then blocking her number is in any way opening a dialogue with her it's not it's ending one clearly and without leaving any room for misinterpretation.

Plus I personally like to have evidence of what I have said for when the shit hits the fan as it is likely to here.

A non reply should not be open to interpretation but it will be, yes she would/will be wrong to assume that your silence signals agreement but why give yourself the hassle of fighting that battle and justifying yourself when the inevitable happens? In her head no doubt she will see it as she has asked you, you always acquiesce to her requests so as far as she is concerned the matter is sorted. Say NO now firmly and unequivocally, block her number, don't give her or her problem another thought and get on with your life there will be zero comeback if you do so.

@G5000

Many airlines have unaccompanied minor programs and mine have been flying UM since they were 5. There's no chance they would just dump a 10 year old in the middle of the airport, they will wait for an authorised person or there will be protocols in place to take care of children if that person doesn't show up.

Many are currently suspended though.

Personalised I would reply saying no, I won't pick him up. You should get an earlier flight back. Do not contact me again.

Just checked. No airlines fly 10 year olds. The youngest unaccompanied age is 12.

That's not true. You were probably checking the age children can fly alone. Unaccompanied Minor service is available for example on Swiss and Lufthansa from age 5.
www.swiss.com/fr/en/prepare/special-care/children-travelling/unaccompanied-minors
www.lufthansa.com/be/en/unaccompanied-minors

@thereisonlyoneofme no idea whether he can fly or not, relaying the crumbs of information I’ve been given. Remember, I’ve no details on the flight itself. If he can’t fly solo, unaccompanied, he will be denied boarding and problem solved (and I’ll probably still get a text!!!)