3 year old peeing in a potty in the corner of a museum

[Griddlesizzle]

As it says in the title. Mother just whips the potty out and the child pees away, without the mum even asking anyone if there was a loo nearby. As a side point, the loo was less than 10m away…

Ai by - it’s pretty vile
Aibu - what else are you gonna do?

I can appreciate that everyone has different circumstances and may make different choices for their different children's needs. I personally would not use a potty and feel like it is undignified for the child. I look after a lot of patients with IBD that have to sprint to a toilet, it certainly wouldn't be as socially acceptable for them to squat down on a portapotty at the mall. If the handryers were an issue they could use the potty inside the baby change area? I feel like at some point they have to be exposed to these sounds + using the big toilet so it makes sense to try and make it a regular visit (OF COURSE for children with sensory difficulties/disabilities you would do whatever your child needed)

Once the first week was over we were absolutely able to go out and about and he has had maybe 2 accidents since (2years on) which were usually cause by a sudden increase in fluid intake. I do remember one mad dash across a supermarket while 35 weeks pregnant, had to abandon my trolley and sprint but he made it!

When I lived in the middle east a mum had used a potty outside a shop in Yas Mall and security were called the case was passed to the police with security footage...it was seen as incredibly offensive there.

You can’t compare adults with potty training toddlers… I say this as someone with Chron’s!!!

Personally I've never used a travel potty and kids have always done the toileting in the toilet or the potty at home. They hated the hand dryers but they had to realise they have to get used to it. I probably wouldn't bother me but I wouldn't want to have had to do it with mine

I was in a shopping centre last week and a couple had set up a potty on a bench. Now usually I wouldn't care but it was literally the bench outside the toilet! I mean why not just take the potty into the loos? They have really really nice toilets and even easy access toilets with special kid toilets. I just didn't understand. Plus super unhygienic having it on top of the bench where other people were going to sit.

Some people go a bit mad over potty training.

Before I had DS I had a few friends and acquaintances with toddlers on Facebook who were potty training - cue daily updates of ‘only one accident today’ ‘two poos on the potty today’ ‘#winningatweeing’… it seemed really weird at the time but thought I’d maybe understand when I had my own children.
I still don’t. Potty training updates are still the most ridiculous thing on SM. I was admittedly excited when my DS did his first wee on the potty, but never under any illusion that anyone else except immediate (very immediate) family would care. Some people do lose their heads over it - to the point that whipping a potty out next to valuable historical artefacts in a room full of strangers becomes the norm 🤷‍♀️

If they can't hold it for more than a few minutes to get to the loo, they aren't ready to be potty trained and should still be in nappies or pull ups in public

And this right here is why parents are sending bloody 4 & 5 year olds to school in nappies. Grim.

LOADS of completely normal 2, 3 and 4 year olds occasionally struggle to hold it more than a couple of mins while finding a toilet. It's not unusual to be 10 or more minutes from a toilet, most parents of course plan in regular toilet stops but the odd accident happens. Surely it's better to use a sealed lidded potty in an odd emergency than for a child to wee through their clothes and all over the floor?

You also wouldn't let your dog do it's business in the middle of a museum.

Most dogs aren’t allowed in museums are they? But if, for example a guide dog was trained to pee in a potty it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest.

@Rosesareyellow

WTF? My son never liked hand dryers but it was tough tits I'm afraid, they're a fact of life that kids need to get used to surely.

It’s a common thing on MN I’ve found though - a child is scared of a benign and everyday thing, as many children are, and instead of having a rational approach or supporting a child in overcoming that fear, parents exacerbate it by avoiding these things completely.

Yes. Which is also why it's so rife with adults and DCs suffering from things you barely hear of outside like emetophobia, as well as every second child having sensory issues. With an autistic child, I truly do understand that some issues, for some children, are absolutely unavoidable - but that number should be really small. Also, a child who is small enough to need.a travel potty can be more than adequately stimulated and entertained without needing to go to a museum.

The average three year old has a bladder capacity of 90-100ml, they might have an accident but the majority of the wee would be soaked up by their clothing. There would not be huge puddles everywhere.

And this right here is why parents are sending bloody 4 & 5 year olds to school in nappies. Grim.

Its not though. At 4 and 5 children should certainly be able to hold it for a few minutes. You don’t need to wait until that age for them to be able to hold it for a while, even a two or three year old can hold it and recognise early enough signals to go to the toilet before their absolutely bursting. Accidents happen from time to time of course. But I imagine those who struggle with waiting to go to the toilet are the ones who have been taught that a potty will magically appear in front of them as soon as they say they need to go.

I once saw someone doing this in the post office queue. I didn't care and nobody else seemed to either. Can't believe so many people think a child having a pee is 'vile, disgusting' etc. So much drama about a kid having a wee

Innocenta

No, you should have assumed that it was possible that the op was talking about an autistic 3 year old. Especially since you made reference to hand driers in response to posters who brought up the possibility of sensory issues. There was no mention of hand driers in the op.

I haven't bullied anyone. I pulled you up on a very unkind statement that you made, which upset me.

I am allowed to use the term 'ableist'. You don't own the word. You know nothing about me.

It's not unusual to be 10 or more minutes from a toilet

Yes, but generally museums do have toilet facilities. Different, admittedly, if a 3 year old is caught short in a park without loos. Then a potty used discreetly in a corner (or a 'nature wee') is more acceptable.

Not acceptable. I've potty trained 4 children and have never had a resort to that. Regular toilet stops and the occasional wet pants got it sorted fairly quickly. Potties are generally an unnecessary step are gross. Just use a toilet.

Also seen this in the bakery aisle of Waitrose

@Ethelfromnumber73

I once saw someone doing this in the post office queue. I didn't care and nobody else seemed to either. Can't believe so many people think a child having a pee is 'vile, disgusting' etc. So much drama about a kid having a wee

It’s not so much the action it’s the place!

I have every sympathy for parents with children who are potty training but I am not sure the local museum is the best place to carry out this process.

We went to the theatre today and halfway through the performance DD(2.5) whispered she needed to pee. Off we went, but turned out the bloody toilets were at the end of a long hall, round the corner, and down three flights of stairs. I'd seen the sign earlier and thought they were just at the end of the hall. Never moved so fast in my life! She was indignant when I scooped her up under my arm and ran down the stairs. I was a sweaty mess when we got back to our seat!

@Wrennie24

Not acceptable. I've potty trained 4 children and have never had a resort to that. Regular toilet stops and the occasional wet pants got it sorted fairly quickly. Potties are generally an unnecessary step are gross. Just use a toilet.

Exactly - bring a change of underpants and trousers for any accidents and plan where you’re going and also yes do explain about holding what you want to do.

Then it turns out they need a shit as well and then there's a child sat in the middle of a public place straining, it stinks of shit the parents need to get the wipes out etc. No thanks I will stick to the toilet

How gross. No need for this whatsoever. Carrying a potty round.

No not ok. I trained 3 kids no need for a potette ever.