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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked to leave for not wearing a mask

502 replies

DuchessOfDisaster · 16/10/2021 11:11

I've just gone to my book group meeting. I'm mask exempt, and have a cold. Not COVID, we test twice a week at work. I was asked to wear a mask and as I didn't have one offered to leave. The other members said they thought that was best.

It's silly but I feel miffed! Even though I think it's the right thing!

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 16/10/2021 11:26

@MiddlesexGirl
"A cold is not symptoms."

The symptoms of the new variants are the same as a cold. The UK hasn't expanded the symptom list.

Milkbottlelegs · 16/10/2021 11:26

You can’t wear a mask and you went to a gathering with a cold? Wtaf? Have you been living in a bunker for the last 18 months?

BashfulClam · 16/10/2021 11:26

@Lazypuppy

If you didn't have a cold then i wpuld have said YANBU, as masks aren't mandatory anymore

However, with a cold YABU

@Lazypuppy only in England, they are still mandatory in Scotland.
Rosesareyellow · 16/10/2021 11:27

I’m surprised by the responses on here. I’m sure pre-Covid no one would have thought it reasonable to tell someone to stay away from everyone because of a cold, except if you were visiting a new born maybe. Times have changed.

stillonthattightrope · 16/10/2021 11:27

Unless you've had a PCR you don't know it's not Covid. You shouldn't have gone with a cold.

WorraLiberty · 16/10/2021 11:27

But how can you be mask exempt and then say you left because you didn't have one?

That implies you would've worn one for a couple of hours?

Therefore you can't be mask exempt, surely?

FilltheWaterPot · 16/10/2021 11:27

Covid is running at record limits in my son's class now. The same as everywhere. The symptoms often start as just a cold. You may well have 'just a cold' but now is a time for putting other people's sense of safety first, especially in a book group where you are likely to be sitting together indoors for some time. Your right not to wear a mask does not trump other people's justified feelings of vulnerability at this time.

DappledThings · 16/10/2021 11:28

Do people really not get on with normal things when they have a cold? Alright maybe different in the current times but pre-covid I never knew of anyone thinking of colds as anything other than a fact of life. I've never thought anything of anyone turning up somewhere with a cold.

Hoppinggreen · 16/10/2021 11:28

@WorraLiberty

I'm mask exempt

I was asked to wear a mask and as I didn't have one offered to leave.

So which is it? Confused

Exactly My understanding of mask exempt is that you CANT wear one. If you did have one with you would you have worn it?
HoldingTheDoor · 16/10/2021 11:29

I’m surprised by the responses on here. I’m sure pre-Covid no one would have thought it reasonable to tell someone to stay away from everyone because of a cold, except if you were visiting a new born maybe. Times have changed.

I wouldn't have attended a hobby with a cold pre-Covid no, and I'm not at all anxious about Covid. It just seems like basic hygiene/manners.That may be because I have asthma and colds affect me severely though.

Tallisimo · 16/10/2021 11:30

I’m surprised you went to the Book Club with a cold. I think you would have been wise to stay away and keep your germs to yourself. People are understandably more worried about this sort of thing now we are living with Covid. We need to be sensitive to one another!

WorraLiberty · 16/10/2021 11:30

@Rosesareyellow

I’m surprised by the responses on here. I’m sure pre-Covid no one would have thought it reasonable to tell someone to stay away from everyone because of a cold, except if you were visiting a new born maybe. Times have changed.
Yes, they've changed for very obvious reasons.

Why are you surprised?

grapewine · 16/10/2021 11:30

@StoneofDestiny

Turning up to a book club with a cold might not have been a smart move.
This was never smart even before covid. No one wants your cold.
Traveller3367 · 16/10/2021 11:30

I'm sick of hearing this self diagnosed "mask exempt" bullshit! Speaking to medics, they have made it pretty clear to me that unless u have a physical deformity or severe mental health problem that means you can't wear a mask or face covering (think deformed jaw, severe learning disability etc) then there is no such thing as mask exempt. I'm glad Brits abroad are learning this the hard way and wish the British justice system grew a pair to tackle this mask exempt selfish bullshit.

GoWalkabout · 16/10/2021 11:31

Sorry, social etiquette changes in a pandemic and people don't have to politely welcome you anyway - its the potential inconvenience if they then get the cold, have to test, get glared at on the tube, as well as the possibility of covid, illness, risk, and potential missing holidays etc.

IWantT0BreakFree · 16/10/2021 11:31

@Rosesareyellow

I’m surprised by the responses on here. I’m sure pre-Covid no one would have thought it reasonable to tell someone to stay away from everyone because of a cold, except if you were visiting a new born maybe. Times have changed.
I would always have expected someone with a cold to stay away from an indoor social gathering at close quarters. I have always done so myself. It's just common courtesy and common sense, surely? I've never known any different. It's certainly not a post-covid thing in my world.
VirtualLife · 16/10/2021 11:31

Do people really not get on with normal things when they have a cold?

Not all colds are mild. My last cold had me in bed for days, was extremely heavy and left me with a cough for 6 weeks. For me it was far far worse than the mild symptoms I had with covid. Yes people might have no choice but to go to work with a cold but a book club fgs, hardly essential.

catfunk · 16/10/2021 11:32

YABVVU. catching a cold during a pandemic with all the hassle and worry that comes with it, is not something I'd want to inflict upon other people.

Viviennemary · 16/10/2021 11:32

You shouldn't have gone at all if you had a cold.

FAQs · 16/10/2021 11:32

Yeah it’s wrong you attended, if someone caught your cold they’d and possibly their family would have to go through the whole testing and potential missed school/work whilst waiting for tests themselves.

SirensofTitan · 16/10/2021 11:32

[quote Ponoka7]@MiddlesexGirl
"A cold is not symptoms."

The symptoms of the new variants are the same as a cold. The UK hasn't expanded the symptom list.[/quote]
By new variants do you mean delta or this there another one? Delta has been around for about a year hasn't it?

I think it's common knowledge that it presents differently and the original three symptoms to try and manage testing when it was in short supply are really in name only now

I dont think everyone should rushing off for PCR tests for every sniffle but equally no one who thinks they might have it needs to worry about qualifying for a test.

ronkey · 16/10/2021 11:33

Do people really not get on with normal things when they have a cold? Alright maybe different in the current times but pre-covid I never knew of anyone thinking of colds as anything other than a fact of life. I've never thought anything of anyone turning up somewhere with a cold.

Yes but then I also read on MNs about people not using a garden during lockdown because neighbours were outside so who knows anymore!

mynameiscalypso · 16/10/2021 11:33

@Rosesareyellow

I’m surprised by the responses on here. I’m sure pre-Covid no one would have thought it reasonable to tell someone to stay away from everyone because of a cold, except if you were visiting a new born maybe. Times have changed.
But if people catch it and develop a cough or temperature (which can happen with a cold), they have to then isolate and test etc. It's a total pain in the arse. Everyone I know is staying home when they have a cold - even if it's confirmed as a cold and not Covid - so that they don't inconvenience everyone else.
ronkey · 16/10/2021 11:34

I would always have expected someone with a cold to stay away from an indoor social gathering at close quarters. I have always done so myself. It's just common courtesy and common sense, surely? I've never known any different. It's certainly not a post-covid thing in my world.

I've never known anyone take sick leave due to a cold?

HoldingTheDoor · 16/10/2021 11:34

Speaking to medics, they have made it pretty clear to me that unless u have a physical deformity or severe mental health problem that means you can't wear a mask or face covering (think deformed jaw, severe learning disability etc) then there is no such thing as mask exempt.

No, the only bs is the ableist bs you're spouting. There are many valid reasons why people may not be able to wear masks, and surprisingly enough these "medics" you apparently talked to are not experts on every single condition or trauma or how they affect every individual. The reasons why have been done to death here though so I'm not going to drag it all up again and derail the thread.