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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked to leave for not wearing a mask

502 replies

DuchessOfDisaster · 16/10/2021 11:11

I've just gone to my book group meeting. I'm mask exempt, and have a cold. Not COVID, we test twice a week at work. I was asked to wear a mask and as I didn't have one offered to leave. The other members said they thought that was best.

It's silly but I feel miffed! Even though I think it's the right thing!

OP posts:
Hobnobsandbroomstick · 17/10/2021 23:15

You probably feel miffed because you know it was the wrong thing to do to turn up with a cold, and are now annoyed with yourself. Just because it isn't covid doesn't mean people will be happy to be exposed to your common cold germs. Very selfish to have turned up, I would have been secretly hoping that you would leave too tbh.

LemonPeonies · 17/10/2021 23:30

So people should expect to never leave the house when they have a cold? 🤣. I still go to work as a nurse when I have a cold, we all do. Before and during "covid" 😒.

GreyhoundG1rl · 17/10/2021 23:33

@LemonPeonies

So people should expect to never leave the house when they have a cold? 🤣. I still go to work as a nurse when I have a cold, we all do. Before and during "covid" 😒.
Well, they shouldn't assume they're welcome in somebody else's house, certainly.
Hobnobsandbroomstick · 17/10/2021 23:40

@LemonPeonies

I'm a nurse too, but would still consider it rude for someone to go to something social if they have a cold. I would have thought this before covid too, no one wants to get a cold, I get enough germs at work and don't need extra ones!

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 18/10/2021 00:30

@LemonPeonies

So people should expect to never leave the house when they have a cold? 🤣. I still go to work as a nurse when I have a cold, we all do. Before and during "covid" 😒.
Oh I find it deeply concerning a nurse put covid in quotation marks.
Hollyhobbi · 18/10/2021 00:44

Population of Northern Ireland 1.5m. Population of Ireland 5m. Now compare death rates and cases in both countries: how come Ireland has about twice as many deaths as Northern Ireland with over 3 times the population? Also note the border counties of Donegal and Monaghan in Ireland have had consistently higher numbers of cases since the start of Covid 19 probably due to cross border shopping and work and also people crossing to and fro for holidays and socialising. These border counties also have the lowest vaccination rates too. We are still wearing masks in shops, on public transport and secondary school staff and all students are wearing masks. If we have a hospital appointment or dental appointment we wear masks too.

Midnightshopping · 18/10/2021 05:15

You may just have a cold. So do I, caught it from my youngest she got it at school. I’m on my second course of antibiotics and steroids and off sick for week 3 now from that “little cold” as this is what leads to secondary infections and I had 2 pcr test not just lateral flow as they are not reliable so not covid. My asthma was so bad the GP wanted to send me to hospital but as it’s like a slum and they treat you like crap I really really dont want to go there. And my asthma is usually fairly mild and well controlled.

That little cold that doesn’t bother you much can make the next person seriously ill.

GrandmaAli · 18/10/2021 05:20

@Scautish

I would have wanted you there, mask or not, if you had a cold. Very selfish of you.
I have to assume you meant to say you wouldn't have wanted her there! No, indeed, keep your germs away.
Marvellousmadness · 18/10/2021 05:24

Pretty selfish to go to a bookclub with a cold....yabuuu

GrandmaAli · 18/10/2021 05:24

@Midnightshopping

You may just have a cold. So do I, caught it from my youngest she got it at school. I’m on my second course of antibiotics and steroids and off sick for week 3 now from that “little cold” as this is what leads to secondary infections and I had 2 pcr test not just lateral flow as they are not reliable so not covid. My asthma was so bad the GP wanted to send me to hospital but as it’s like a slum and they treat you like crap I really really dont want to go there. And my asthma is usually fairly mild and well controlled.

That little cold that doesn’t bother you much can make the next person seriously ill.

I know how you feel but these colds are 'super colds' as we've been locking our germs up with us during lockdown!! Our family are suffering the same and this 'little cold' is anything but little and has knocked each of us for 6 dozen as & when we've contracted it! I hope you're well soon.
JudgementalCactus · 18/10/2021 05:46

@Vinomummyinlockdown

Plenty of mask wearers and vaccinated are getting covid so your point is ridiculous.
So are you going totally ignore the peer reviewed article i linked about the effectivness of masks?
MrsJackWhicher · 18/10/2021 06:46

I was annoyed (pre Covid) when someone came to my house for bookclub with a streaming cold.
The mask is irrelevant. I certainly wouldn’t want people wearing masks in my house.

RantyAunty · 18/10/2021 07:38

I wouldn't go to a social outing with a cold.

Most probably aren't that affected by colds but there are some who get quite ill from them and takes a week or two to shake them.

I like the idea of wearing a mask if I'm sick and of course keeping up with hand washing. Hopefully I'm less likely to make someone else sick.

FreedomFaith · 18/10/2021 07:43

@ExtraOnions

Never mind COVID, I wouldn’t want someone with a Cold sat next to me either …. Keep your germs to yourself
This. It's a book group, it's not essential that you go like work. You shouldn't have gone at all. Plus your title is misleading, you offered to leave and they agreed with you. Yabu.
Barney60 · 18/10/2021 08:21

I hope if your mask exempt you wear a face screen in stead in public.
Yes your leaving was the right thing to do.

Chuck2015 · 18/10/2021 08:26

To add to the discussion I want make the point that people have sacrificed their lives in war for this country and still do but the majority of this generation can’t be arsed to wear a mask for half an hour here and there. That’s what our generation will be remembered for. It’s truly pathetic. And not doing it because Boris says it’s ok is also not excusable - the man told us we’d get 500 mill for the NHS remember, and many more dangerous lies. We are given an education and the ability to judge and weigh up a situation based on actual facts and reality so I would urge everyone who has doubts - if you truly want rid of this virus, use your common sense and don’t do things or not do things just because this useless government says it’s ok! It’s not like they have a history of making the right decisions!

cazzy71 · 18/10/2021 10:06

Its a cold. Shielding behind masks is ridiculous. If we all stayed away from others if we had a seasonal cold , never worked, shopped or visited anywhere, they'd be no life. Its stupid to halt your interets due to a runny nose.
The members were being over reactive.

JudgementalCactus · 18/10/2021 10:11

@cazzy71

Its a cold. Shielding behind masks is ridiculous. If we all stayed away from others if we had a seasonal cold , never worked, shopped or visited anywhere, they'd be no life. Its stupid to halt your interets due to a runny nose. The members were being over reactive.
How do you know it's just a cold? There was no PCR test. You can't know for sure that it's not covid.
MrsSkylerWhite · 18/10/2021 10:13

JesusIsAnyNameFree

LemonPeonies
So people should expect to never leave the house when they have a cold? 🤣. I still go to work as a nurse when I have a cold, we all do. Before and during "covid" 😒.
Oh I find it deeply concerning a nurse put covid in quotation marks.“

Yep. If you presented yourself with a cold, to treat my elder parents or frail MIL, you would receive a polite but firm no thank you.

Insanelysilver · 18/10/2021 11:36

I think covid has changed our thinking about people coming to work or social situations whilst obviously infectious.
It used to be that you’d get brownie points for struggling in unwell but after our recent covid experiences, no one wants to risk catching anything.
Even colds are supposed to be way worse than normal and even if it was mild, no ones ever convinced a cold is just a cold now or if it’d affect them differently.
I’d be running out of the room with my jumper over my head if I found myself in a room with someone full of cold now lol

DottyHarmer · 18/10/2021 11:44

This reminds me of when dd was in reception and a father carried in one of dd's classmates in a blanket . The teacher barred the door and said she could not come in, with the father standing foursquare saying he had an important meeting and her dm was at work (she worked as an intensive care nurse Shock ). There was quite a stand off with the teacher stating they could not look after a child who was clearly quite unwell. I had been hovering in the doorway with dd as if the child had been admitted dd and I would have been outta there pronto.

This is obviously an extreme example, but to turn up at a social occasion full of cold was always dubious behaviour, but now is an absolute no no.

ejhhhhh · 18/10/2021 12:20

It's a book club meet up, the OP wasn't going to work as a nurse whilst there. We might not be able to stay off work if we have a cold, but no-one needs to go to a book club meet up with one.

OverTheRubicon · 18/10/2021 13:07

@cazzy71

Its a cold. Shielding behind masks is ridiculous. If we all stayed away from others if we had a seasonal cold , never worked, shopped or visited anywhere, they'd be no life. Its stupid to halt your interets due to a runny nose. The members were being over reactive.
Even if it is just a cold, if it's spread to others then they are also likely to get ill and be inconvenienced too, whether that is taking days off work waiting for a PCR test or with a sick child. A book club is not in any way a necessary outing, it's selfish to go like that.
caspersmagicaljourney · 18/10/2021 13:44

YABU - I certainly wouldn't want your cold, I'm sure others wouldn't either.

Mollymoostoo · 18/10/2021 14:57

Having a cold is not COVID. People need to get a grip. We still have to to to work and school with a cold. Could you imagine how many classes would be closed of teachers stayed home or kids were kept off.
Pre- COVID nobody would have minded and no everyone is making a fuss over the common cold.
I personally would have stayed home because colds make me feel rorren, buy I'm guessing if you felt up to going, your cold want more than a sniffle anyway

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