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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder that if you're so poor...

116 replies

Emprexia · 09/12/2007 10:54

... that you cant afford to buy your kids anything for xmas, wtf are you doing online?

last i heard, internet cost money, wether you have it at your house or pay to use the library/internet cafe.

Instead of coming Online and bitching about how skint you are... keep the pennies and try spending them on your kids instead!!!

OP posts:
QuintessentialShadowOfYuleTide · 09/12/2007 11:10

No Cheeset I realize that, but in light of her profile, which I would urge people to read, my post was meanspirited.

cheeset · 09/12/2007 11:10

Kaishay, how much is Broadband internet?

cheeset · 09/12/2007 11:11

slips out the back door

RubySlippers · 09/12/2007 11:11

ah QZ - have read profile now ...

Original poster
Emprexia · 09/12/2007 11:14

Sorry guys.

It was a genuine question, for those who haven't read profile, i'm autistic.. Asperger syndrome.

I have to ask these things to find out if my first thoughts about things are right or not.... better to ask you guys than blurt something to people and offend them.

Probably could have worded it better though... i need an edit button...

OP posts:
hatrick · 09/12/2007 11:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MrsWeasleysmagicmincepies · 09/12/2007 11:15

At my library its free if you join too.

Also lots of people have access at work. My boss doesnt object if we use the internet during our breaks.

My parents have a deal where they get broadband included in the price of their phone and its the same price as just the phone alone.

May I take this opportunity to wish you all a merry christmas and if during this festive season you feel the "need" to have a moan please feel free to do it here. Most of us are always here to support each other and wont judge you. We "may" not agree with you but we will support you opps sorry forgot my hat Thats better, felt naked for a moment there.

SeaShells · 09/12/2007 11:15

I pay £30 a month for my phone/broadband/TV, which yes over a year accumulates to quite alot of money which I could use to buy toys for my children at christmas... or I could keep my internet which is literally (as a very lonely single parent) my only connection to the world outside my four walls!

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 09/12/2007 11:16

feel free to ask away on here rather than blurting it RL.

RubySlippers · 09/12/2007 11:17

kaishay - agree your wording could have been a lot better ... WTF sounds confrontational IMO

takes a big person to apologise too

and what Fairytale said!

cheeset · 09/12/2007 11:18

Here here Mr Weasly, Ho Ho Ho
Kaishay pleased to meet you!

QuintessentialShadowOfYuleTide · 09/12/2007 11:18

Thats allright Kayashay, we all need an edit button sometimes.... Me included. Sorry about my rant below.
I logged on this morning, your post was the first I opened, and my eyes popped out of my head! I bet they are still stuck on the other side of the room lol.

Broadband is only a couple of pounds per week. I pay £23 per month for wireless broadband. I dont think it is much, considering what I get for it.

I do all my grocery shopping online, so it is done in 10 minutes rather than a few hours, I work from home, and aside from that, I think my brain would explode without the friendships and support on here!

I hope you too find it a valuable place for information and support.

jinglebells2shoessmells · 09/12/2007 11:19

well i am not "poor" but we have a deal as virgin cocked up. £10 a month. as ds is in yr 11 it is a necessity rather than a extravegance(oh and I never go out)

Original poster
Emprexia · 09/12/2007 11:21

Hatrick.. i have walked in those shoes, and even though my internet is my lifeline to support and the outside world.. and quite frankly i go mad without it... i felt that the little money we had was better spent on my step-daughter at the time than on myself.

I guess i just dont understand how people can't make that decision and would rather do it the other way around.

and i didn't mean the people who get it free or access from elsewhere.. i literally just meant the people who pay for it.

And lastly, for the askers.. my connection costs me 25quid a month.

OP posts:
PrisonerCellBlockAitch · 09/12/2007 11:21

hi kaishay, i disagree because my dd gets a huge amount of enjoyment from the computer (receiving photos from relatives/poissonrouge/cbeebies) and it's setting her up for a world where no doubt she'll be using the computer a lot. so i suppose i'd say there's a greater long-term benefit than a piece of plastic that she'll probably lose interest in anyway. plus, like people have said, the support that mothers can access on the internet is pretty invaluable just to keeping going sometimes so i think it's a good investment of limited resources.

PrisonerCellBlockAitch · 09/12/2007 11:22

i think you could probabaly get a better deal, kaishay, if you shopped around. 25 is a lot.

Original poster
Emprexia · 09/12/2007 11:24

Quintissential.

As i said above, the internet is my lifeline, so i do understand that aspect of it.. i dont cope well with friendships outside of cyberland, lol.

OP posts:
hatrick · 09/12/2007 11:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

QuintessentialShadowOfYuleTide · 09/12/2007 11:26

Ah, I forgot, I am from overseas, and it is very useful for keeping in touch with my family back home. This way I can email my parents photos of their grand children, and they can "talk" with their cousin, and also with their dad, as he is away in Asia for months at the time.

I think people have such different life situations, most have very valid reasons why internet is so important for them.

If I really had to cut down my expenses it would be the very last thing, to be honest. But that is because I need it for work, and I also need a provider with unlimited download and upload limits

whispywhisp · 09/12/2007 11:38

kaishay - why are you on here then? Read your post 11.01 today - go and spend some time with your kids rather than come on here and bitch.

Whether the internet costs people money or not it is no business of yours.

Judy1234 · 09/12/2007 11:39

It is an obvious logic type question someone who is autistic might ask.

In a sense a parent who says they cannot afford presents probably does not mean that literally, that's the point.

Also all parents prioritise and what we choose to spend on varies from person to person.

Obviously we could all spend a lot less on all sorts of things but we draw our own lines in the sand to decide what those are.

LittleSleighBellasRinging · 09/12/2007 11:46

It's a very random thing to ask though isn't it?

Why not say "why have you got a TV/ why do you pay for heating/ why are you paying for guitar lessons if you've got no money?"

As Xenia says, it's all about priorities, but I don't understand why presents take priority over an invaluable source of information, education and support. I think people have different priorities, and that's fine, as long as your priorities aren't actively harming your children.

TotalChaos · 09/12/2007 11:48

I think that Kaishay's further post clarifies matters:-

that a person on another forum appears to blatantly be asking to be sent Xmas presents for their kids. which I think would make many of us feel a bit [hmmm]

lazawreath · 09/12/2007 11:52

It can be lonely, daunting, scary being a parent and to have a site like this for reassurance from other people in the same situation is invaluable to a lot of people.
Also, you can not deny people the things they enjoy just because of the money situation, and as this site shows, there are lots of people who are more financially comfortable who are willing to help those less well off.
Everyone deserves to be happy.

lazawreath · 09/12/2007 12:05

I do see where you are coming from though kaishay, that it seems a logical conclusion to stop using something that isn't a neccessity in order to save money.