Can you die from no sleep?

[Ineedsleephelp]

I have a 3 week old and a 3 year old. Last night the 3 week old did a long stretch of sleep during which I was kept up by a poorly 3y old. This seems to have triggered massive anxiety around sleep and since then I have not been able to sleep. I lay awake all night. Its happening tonight again. They are both peacefully asleep now and I just can't sleep. I'm hot, sweaty and dizzy, starting to feel ill from lack of sleep after 3 weeks of limited sleep already. I'm so scared, if I become unwell what will happen to my DC? I feel like I won't survive unless I sleep soon but I just can't. I know I only have a couple of hours till baby needs a feed but I just can't freaking sleep. It's a horrible feeling and I'm freaking out.

@ThirdElephant

I'd get up, go downstairs, get a glass of warm milk and a banana if you've got one and fancy it, lie down on the sofa with a blanket, stick the TV on (teleshopping is best) and stop trying to sleep. You'll nod off in no time.

This always works for me if i cant sleep, i have to move to a different room

There is a podcast called Nothing Much Happens which was recommended on here and really helps me sleep. They also have a book by the same name if you find that is a better way to make you feel sleepy.

I sympathise OP, I have been a lifelong sufferer of insomnia, and I know that ill feeling from being over tired too well. Especially worse when my DC were babies.

it's hard having a baby and a toddler

they have such different needs and they need to be met.

your dh needs to step up.
he can do bed&bath whilst you get an hour of sleep in the evening.
he can let you sleep in at the weekend.

take time for yourself. hand him the dc and have a bath. on. your. own.

wrt sleep - your body will get the benefit of a rest even if you don't sleep.
get headphones, look at podcasts just lie down, get comfortable and rest your body.

good luck!

I think you should see your GP if it continues. Not because lack of sleep will harm you but because it could be a symptom of quite severe PND.

Sleep ease tablets from Boots. They really work and are over the counter.

Read somewhere that this helps .9 out of 10 times for me .lying down in bed ,put your palm flat down at the top of your tummy .just under your breasts .don't press down hard.lightly rest it there .say to yourself "my solar plexus is warm" over and over in your head. Does relax you so much

Hot bath, guided meditation app and you'll fall right to sleep. The guided meditation will force you to focus on something else, relaxing.

No. Ive been where you are (desperate to sleep but too stressed about not sleeping to sleep) and ots an awful place. But your body will eventually take the sleep it needs.

Go speak to your gp. It took a course of cbt and a sleep restriction programme (completely counter intuitive but it worked) to get me sleeping normally again. But the mental pressure of not sleeping is huge so you need help.

Thank you all I read all your messages in the night and they helped so much. I didn't want to respond then to limit screentime as advised.

Reading that it was just a blip and I would be OK really helped my catastrophising brain, as well as hearing to just aim for rest not sleep.

I kept telling myself this, listened to a podcast and eventually did fall asleep. I only got half an hour before my brain woke me up but it took the edge off and after feeding baby I got back to sleep fairly easily which has taken away a lot of the fear. I think I got about 3 hours.

I find looking after my newborn quite soothing this time, it's really my toddler waking that triggers the anxiety , probably because they usually sleep very well so when they don't I feel like it's all going wrong and I am completely doomed. Whenever they made a noise in the night my heart started racing and I couldn't breathe. When they were a baby was when I first experienced anxiety/insomnia and I was so happy to think I had avoided it this time...

I get that DH should deal with toddler wakings but they have been such a mess since the baby was born I knew they would kick off and cry longer unless I went in. As it is I just walked them back to their room and they went back to sleep quickly. Wouldn't have been an issue if my anxiety hadn't then kept me up for another 3 hours afterwards...

I will speak to GP about something that can be used when breastfeeding in case it gets bad again. As a PP said, I probably won't even need to take it but just knowing the option is there will help me massively. As I feel so trapped with breastfeeding knowing I can't go away for a night if I get to breaking point, and can't take any medicine to help.

In general I just need to stop thinking about sleep so much I think. I had a csection and am housebound so my days have consisted in sitting there holding baby and trying to nap for 3 weeks, then going to bed at 8pm with baby to get some sleep. I have zero other distraction or interaction to busy my brain with, and am so sick of the number of hours spent in that bedroom trying to sleep. Hopefully once I can get out and about I'll feel more normal again.

Thank you all so much again, your support made all the difference so I didn't feel so lonely and it got me out of my own brain. So reassuring to know others have been through the same and came out the other side. I think DH thinks I'm weird and make my life hard for no reason, he doesn't get it at all, so it's good to know it can be fairly normal in the postnatal period.

The tips on this thread are great - cognitive shuffling especially. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/4370129-How-do-you-switch-off-from-overthinking-at-bedtime

Please do talk to your doctor and also ask to have your thyroid checked. There's a common condition called post partum thyroiditis which can cause an increase in thyroid hormones after birth. It's often not diagnosed because mums think it's just anxiety/lack of sleep but blood tests would show it to. Symptoms include insomnia, night sweats, and anxiety and shakiness - it sounds like you have all of these so worth getting checked out.

Ah OP. I felt as you did after my first - even when he was sleeping I couldn’t sleep.

You won’t die. And the very rare examples where it may be possible to die from lack of sleep do not apply here. You will feel terrible and in an extremely vicious circle lack of sleep contributes to anxiety and ‘crazy’ thoughts (been there).

Your husband must help out with the 3 year old. Doesn’t matter if he wants mummy, she’s not available. He won’t die or suffer long term trauma either :)

Agree with the suggestion if you can get someone to take the 3 yo and baby for a long walk after a feed during the day and you can lie down for 2 hours knowing nothing will disturb you. Even if you don’t sleep it’s an opportunity to rest and let go.

Do speak to your GP if the anxiety is persisting.

This too will pass.

Take care xx

Menopausal me 🥳 I used to sleep for England. Now 🙄 horrendous. Anyway I use sominex, buy from the chemist, help me loads. Obviously if you’re breast feeding they are a no no, and I only take them for around 2 days to kick my sleep pattern back. Good luck it’s bloody awful.

Yes, but it would be close to a year to happen.
The person I saw about on TV had a medical condition which meant he could not sleep and that is how long it took, but he was terribly ill by the time he died. His condition is super rare.

Nytol tablets help lots with this sort of thing but make sure you have someone in the house who would wake up in case you’re too out of it.

As in sleeping tablets would not even put him to sleep.

I'm a lifelong insomniac. Honestly when I get to the stage where its night after night sleep hygiene and masks and podcasts stop working for me and I clear my schedule/children commitments and take a sleeping tablet at bedtime. I only do this once every couple of months and usually its because I work nightshifts and struggle to get back in to days. It does leave you a little groggy in the morning so not sure I'd want to be feeding a newborn like that. So DH would have to do a couple bottles for one night. It just seems to reset my sleep a little and then I get back into a better sleeping routine.

Hot, sweaty, and dizzy, plus being to anxious to sleep. (I’m assuming you’ve checked your temp and ruled out illness) I would say you have developed post-natal anxiety and specifically health anxiety.

Please contact your midwife and get a referral to your perinatal team. They will definitely be able to help you.

I had this for a while, triggered by the death of a loved one. I would get right up to the point of drifting off and then my body would panic and wake myself up.

Don’t worry you are not going to die.

What worked for me (anxiety is something that can’t be cured as we need it in small amount so you have to learn how to manage it) might not work for you but when I fine my mind spiralling I find it helpful to remember this phrase:

Thoughts are not facts, they are simply events that occur in the brain.

Having a healthy mum is the most important thing for your husband and children. If breastfeeding is not helping your mental state, there is no shame to moving or going to combi feeding. You’ve given them all the good stuff at the beginning anyway. Can you try expressing or formula for one feed just so you can have a bit of rest. Is the toddler in nursery, can family come over and have the baby for a few hours so you can get some sleep during the day?

It'll pass.

Get DH to help maybe even do a night-time feed/change.

Let toddler have a sleep over at gran & grandad for a night.

@Wnikat

I think you should see your GP if it continues. Not because lack of sleep will harm you but because it could be a symptom of quite severe PND.

This

There are some great replies about getting too sleep and I know that’s what you asked about but the sleep problem is a symptom of something else. Your midwife would really want to know about this to help you through it and get you the right support. I don’t know if you were told signs to look out for but being sleeplessness is a big one.

For most dying from lack of sleep is that the sleep deprivation causes delusions and mania and leads to suicidal tendencies which ultimately can lead to the person ending their life.
Speak to your support network and get some help

It doesn’t at all surprise me that a nurse is saying that something is impossible when it absolutely is possible. Who cares about accuracy when giving out medical advice 🤷🏻‍♀️
Definitely speak to your GP and not a midwife, but tell them everything about your anxiety etc as well as your breastfeeding concerns. Don’t be worried about taking medication if they recommend it

Op did u have any complications after ur c section? Very unusual to be housebound 3 weeks after ur c section. I ve had 3 c sections and I was actively encouraged to get up and move s soon and as much as I could

I had the sand through disturbed nights constantly. I started getting massive anxiety and panic attacks in my sleep where I’d imagine children screaming even when they weren’t. It took my youngest to get to four for me to start to feel more normal. Even now though if he’s ill and starts screaming in the night it all comes back again.