DH nearly knocked woman flying

[OneFlewOverTheOwlsNest]

We were due to travel to Dublin and the security at the airport was ridiculously long - we were not going to make the flight. Once through security we literally sprinted to the gate, once there DH charged at the woman who was just closing the gate, she turned just in time to see him flying towards her and screamed “SHIT!!!” As he crashed into her - he caught her before she fell and breathlessly asked “we were stuck in security!”
She opened the gate back up and called the mini bus thing to come back whilst explaining that the two missing passengers had arrived - and nearly took her out in the process. I was mortified. The bus came back for us and the woman started laughing and said “Jesus, I need a drink”. I apologised profusely and she said it was ok, she just assumed she was being attacked for a minute. She then apologised for swearing (!!)
Once we were on the plane the pilot came on the tannoy apologising for the delay explaining that they had to wait for two late passengers. Everyone looked at us. I have never forgotten it and I do laugh when I think back but Christ, he could’ve been arrested!

Feeling shit today, AIbU to ask for your holiday disaster stories? (Lighthearted!!)

Also - AIbU to laugh about this now - years later - despite how “wrong” it was at the time?

I don’t have one - but OP this post nearly made me wet myself 🤣🤣🤣 I’d need a drink after that too! At least he caught her and apologised!!! She saw the funny side of it - and you can all laugh it off now!

I am usually so organised and get to airports ridiculously early, so I always used to look at people doing the mad dash to the front of the security queue and smugly think ‘why weren’t they more organised?’ Then it happened to me and I will never judge again. It was horrible.

I was in my early 20s and I was on one of my first business trips with a small group of colleagues. I was the youngest, most junior employee there and also the only woman. It was quite intimidating and there was one man in particular, quite senior to me, who was very aggressive and opinionated.

We were all catching flights back to different places after our conference and I had planned to get a taxi to the airport which would give me plenty of time. This guy insisted I take the subway with him and a couple of others. Their flight was later than mine but he was so adamant that I would make it and that it would be a waste of money to get a taxi. Despite my better judgment I agreed and got the subway with them. It took forever and I got to the airport with something like 15 mins until my flight (with this arsey bloke still bleating the whole way about how I was worrying about nothing and would definitely make it and if I didn’t make it I could just get a hotel at the airport for the night - I just wanted to be home!)

I was rushed to the front of the queue for security etc (with all the dirty looks that entailed!) and charged through the airport only to get to the gate and realise I’d been so flustered at security I’d left my fucking passport there. Ran back but was so stressed I couldn’t figure out where security was, until some nice staff members came to the aid of the crazy woman having a full blown meltdown and somehow unable to read the big ‘SECURITY’ signs that were right there. Managed to retrieve my passport and sprint back to the gate, and by some absolute miracle I actually made it. I was that person stumbling onto the flight last, sweaty and out of breath and on the receiving end of aaaall the disapproving looks! I will never, ever judge anyone else in that position again.

To this day I am annoyed with myself that I let some arsey mansplaining twat talk me into that position and will never let that happen again!

On a plane, my DP opened the over head locker and our bottle of gin rolled out and hit the woman in front on the head!!! I was mortified!! Poor woman, it really must have hurt!

Are you a bit bored this morning OP and thought you would trot-out the 'funny' airport story.

Every now and again I pop onto MN to see if people have cheered the fuck up.

They have not.

See you again in a few months!

I have to admit I've had really good experiences with easyjet.

Same here. We’ve flown with pretty much every U.K. airline and a couple of US ones with our daughter who needs special assistance. EasyJet win by miles with how they deal with that. BA comes second last to Delta.

I don’t understand why people are posting snarky comments to the OP

@OneFlewOverTheOwlsNest I don’t find this story funny. It’s reminded me exactly why I haven’t been on a plane for 12 years.

I’m disabled and I can’t cope with the way other people behave in airports. Even with special assistance, people crash into my wheelchair or the special buggy. They moan when I get priority in a queue and get cross if I take longer at security. Airport staff are always fantastic but other passengers behave incredibly badly towards disabled people. I really don’t find this story amusing. Your husband behaved like a dick.

[quote ImNotDancing]@Fluffypastelslippers absolutely I do I just think it’s weird for you to hang around on the thread being mardy after you’ve expressed your distaste for it[/quote]

Do you? I always go back to threads on 'I'm on' when someone has posted. I thought that was how forums worked?

@MyCatDribbles

I don’t understand why people are posting snarky comments to the OP

It's not snarky to say you don't find it funny.

On a plane, my DP opened the over head locker and our bottle of gin rolled out and hit the woman in front on the head!!! I was mortified!! Poor woman, it really must have hurt!

Our daughter had a water bottle with a straw on a flight to London. The we know to avoid putting fizzy water in it as it can shoot out. But the water was almost flat so we didn’t think it would be a problem. Obviously with the difference in pressure, what was almost flat was actually now not very flat and when we opened the bottle, the water shot out and formed a perfect arc, hitting a woman in a business suit three rows ahead. We apologised profusely, offered to pay for her food and drinks. She refused and kept saying the words that it was ok, but her face made it clear it wasn’t! I wish she had actually just told us how angry she was, we’d have felt better about it if she had! It was a bit like when your mum should be angry but just says she’s “disappointed”.

I was on a flight quite recently where the captain came over the tannoy and said our plane had more passengers than it should, and could any passengers make themselves known to the crew if they weren’t expecting to travel to Bristol (from the Isle of Man). Two passengers sheepishly hit the call button above their seats - they thought it was the Liverpool flight (the planes were next to each other on the runway but still not sure how they got in the wrong queue - the Liverpool flight had already left !!) Evidently there had been a bit of a kerfuffle about seat numbering but the flight wasn’t full and they’d sat in any old seats……

They moan when I get priority in a queue and get cross if I take longer at security. Airport staff are always fantastic but other passengers behave incredibly badly towards disabled people. I really don’t find this story amusing. Your husband behaved like a dick.

Agreed. We have this too. They moan when you get on first and sit at the front. What they don’t see is you waiting an hour for the ambilift to turn up at the end of the flight.

@MyCatDribbles

I don’t understand why people are posting snarky comments to the OP

Maybe they just don't find it "hilarious"

We've not had tea being spat out, babies wakened, or dogs looking at posters as if they're mad

Although I do see a poster has almost wet themselves at the unbelievable hilarity of the OP

@Youdoyoutoday

On a plane, my DP opened the over head locker and our bottle of gin rolled out and hit the woman in front on the head!!! I was mortified!! Poor woman, it really must have hurt!

I’m surprised she wasn’t knocked out! A full bottle of gin falling from a height could cause a serious head injury.

I guess I'm in the humourless sod camp - or it could be that the OP story just isn't funny.
Try again, OP.

I was on a flight quite recently where the captain came over the tannoy and said our plane had more passengers than it should, and could any passengers make themselves known to the crew if they weren’t expecting to travel to Bristol (from the Isle of Man).

I saw this happen once too. They did a headcount and had one too many passengers. They did an announcement to check everyone was going to wherever it was, and still no one came forward. They had to check everyone’s boarding passes and eventually found the man who was on the wrong flight. He didn’t speak English so I guess hadn’t understood any of the numerous announcements saying ‘is everyone absolutely sure they’re travelling to X’.

@Mumtofourandnomore

I was on a flight quite recently where the captain came over the tannoy and said our plane had more passengers than it should, and could any passengers make themselves known to the crew if they weren’t expecting to travel to Bristol (from the Isle of Man). Two passengers sheepishly hit the call button above their seats - they thought it was the Liverpool flight (the planes were next to each other on the runway but still not sure how they got in the wrong queue - the Liverpool flight had already left !!) Evidently there had been a bit of a kerfuffle about seat numbering but the flight wasn’t full and they’d sat in any old seats……

How on earth were they allowed to board the wrong plane? I would find that a bit worrying tbh.

My friend and I once held up a plane after a few airport drinks because we got chatting to a pilot, also smoking, who happened to be our pilot, and she was also late to the flight because we were stood nattering and smokiny for so long. Oops.

I know, I was so worried for her and offered everything I could possibly do! I even offered to give our details incase something came to light after but she said no!!
This was 4 years ago and I still worry about her!

@Balonzette

My friend and I once held up a plane after a few airport drinks because we got chatting to a pilot, also smoking, who happened to be our pilot, and she was also late to the flight because we were stood nattering and smokiny for so long. Oops.

I bet everyone found it hilarious though

Backpacking and volunteering, I went along with some German volunteers who wanted a night out in a Casino. Security refused to let me and one other girl in as our shoes didn't meet the dresscode. We got around it because one very well dressed lady whose husband had also been refused was so annoyed that she gave me her shoes, and my friend persuaded the security guard to lend her his size 9s, and he stood behind the plinth in his socks while we enjoyed our evening

No idea why people have to be so sour faced. Maybe it was funny, maybe it wasn't. I suspect the po-faced brigade were also monitoring their neighbours during lockdown.

As an aside, I hope these people have helped you to realise, OP, that your husband is a disorganised, mysogynistic twat who goes around lording it over the small fry who work in customer services. I suggest you LTB forthwith and never say anything remotely jocular again.

@BoredZelda

They moan when I get priority in a queue and get cross if I take longer at security. Airport staff are always fantastic but other passengers behave incredibly badly towards disabled people. I really don’t find this story amusing. Your husband behaved like a dick.

Agreed. We have this too. They moan when you get on first and sit at the front. What they don’t see is you waiting an hour for the ambilift to turn up at the end of the flight.

Exactly this. Almost every time.

I have a few... I travel on my own.. In Amsterdam I ended up in a gay bar by accident looking for a loo. In Paris I was at the top of the Eiffel Tower and a WW2 air raid siren went off on the other side of the city. In Rome I had two men arguing and waving their arms around about which bus stop I should get off at.
The scariest though was last year in Vienna. I got on the underground to go the airport and missed the airport stop. The guard was very cross and demanded to see my passport.. He looked at it and then said "'Next stop.... You.... Off!!!" I had to get off in the middle of nowhere. Then cross the railway line. There was one bungalow where I got off and a concrete shelter. A man sat in there and he helped me get my ticket. I had to sit half an hour with the man in the shelter and wait for the train to take me back to the airport. Luckily I had left plenty of time so arrived in time to check in...