To expect my child doesn't watch tele at nursery?

[Ralph871]

My almost 3 year old has been attending the same nursery since we moved back to the UK from Australia last year. I'm happy with the nursery and he really likes it there, his wee brother who is 18 months started going a few months ago and I've had no complaints however tonight when I picked him up he was sat with 5 other kids watching cartoons on a large computer monitor, this is the third night in as many weeks that this has been the case.

He watches Tele at home of course although we do try to be on the stricter side but regardless of that Am I being unreasonable to expect that he doesn't watch tele at nursery?

I'm currently paying £1200 per month for them both to attend three days each as I work full time nightshift, kind of pisses me off to pay over a third of my salary to childcare and then find him sat watching tele.

I know at DDs nursery staff weren’t paid extra to clean and lockup so had to be done whilst children were there. Also if there weren’t many children in later they would reduce staff numbers to as few as possible.
I’m not sure small children need to be ‘engaged with’ for 10 hours, for many it would be far far too much engagement.

@Peardear

This is very common for later afternoon/evening. Being in nursery all day is very tiring and overwhelming and yes there is targeted learning all day until about 3 o’clock when majority of children go home and later children can relax and have some down time. It absolutely does not go on all day watching TV/iPad. If children have targeted learning for every hour they were in, they would be extremely frustrated, over-tired and over-stimulated which leads to continual meltdowns and keeps them wired for far too long even after nursery. They go from high as kites to more relaxed and ready for transition to home, dinner, bath and bed.

But there are nurseries that don’t resort to screens for this (DD is at one!) and I don’t pick up a frustrated, overtired or overstimulated child at the end of the day. So there must be ways for the children to have a bit of downtime without it being tv or tablets.

I’m really surprised by the responses on this thread, I don’t think screens from 4:30pm like OP describes is acceptable at all, and I’ve got friends who’ve moved their toddlers to different nurseries because they felt they were using screens far too much.

Sounds reasonable to me, at the end of the day/week, when children are tired.

I've been a reception teacher (not nursery, though) and at most we'd have one episode of Numberjacks on at the end of the day, or something. So if school finished at 3:10pm, it might be on from 3pm. Children who then went to after school club wouldn't have a screen on, either, unless it was a bit of a treat.

I think having a screen on at nursery for the last 60-90 minutes is too much. I agree that someone should be doing something with the children and then maybe a programme from 5:30pm or whatever.

OP, I think your fees are typical, though, sorry! I have one DC, pay ~£400/month for 2 1/2 days - 8:45-3:45, 8:00-3:45 and 8:45-12:45. So two children for three full days must be around £1200. £400 is between a quarter and a third of my wage (depending on how my freelancing has gone that month). Not sure it's "reasonable", but the cost is what it is.

At ds nursery I liked it to mirror a day at home as much as possible.
So days at home would include trips out/playing outside, indoor activities playing/reading/library trips/playgroup soft play. Meal times, snack times and we would use tv maybe when I cleared up in the morning to leave for an activity, and when I was cooking tea later in the day.

The Nursery we opted for was set up similarly with lots of in and outdoor activities and, yes in the evening they would watch cartoons.
I knew he had been busy earlier in the day and that there were lots of reading times/song times.
I think it’s healthy for them to have limited exposure to learn technology can be one strategy for relaxing.

Now at after school club they watch tv and I’m fine with that, it’s been a busy day at school, then activities earlier after school club. The last half an hour after 5 I’m quite happy for them to be doing what they would be doing at home and relax in front of the tv.

But if it didn’t reflect what I thought was acceptable at home I’d be unhappy.

However I don’t think the nursery are unreasonable as some parents will be happy with this others won’t. so if you don’t think you can accept this maybe look for a different childcare provider, or if you really like everything else about them and this is just the one 15-30 mins of the day you dislike then try to overlook it?

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all. I let my kids watch plenty of TV at home but at nursery I am paying for something better than my crappy parenting. But beware OP, at my DD’s state primary they watched TV every day in reception and despite having access to a wealth of educational choices it included Mr Bean and Mauna.

I think it's unrealistic to think screens won't be used. We can't pretend they don't exist and they can be educational and part of a learning experience. One day it might be cartoons, the next could be yoga on YouTube. I really for nursery staff because I imagine it's a last resort when they are stretched with cleaning, planning/paperwork and parents collecting children.

Why do people keep telling the OP she’s unreasonable and many nurseries use screens for 15-30 minutes before the end of the day?

The nursery had screens on from 4.30 and they don’t close until 6… that’s not 15 minutes of downtime.

@JustLyra

Why do people keep telling the OP she’s unreasonable and many nurseries use screens for 15-30 minutes before the end of the day?

The nursery had screens on from 4.30 and they don’t close until 6… that’s not 15 minutes of downtime.

How do you know that though? All the children and likely the staff will have left at 6pm. I know some nurseries are bad and there's no defending them but I want to stick up for the good ones and I know in my son's old nursery the staff had to go put on the washing machine and dishwasher around half 4 so the cycle would be finished for them to go home at 6pm, they weren't paid after then so had to get everything done before. They would have TV or yoga etc around half 4 to 5 then all the children would go into the baby room with a small amount of toys while the rest of the nursery was cleaned. It's rubbish for the staff in these private nurseries who have so much to do for such little pay.

@SallyLovesCheese

Completely agree my fees are typical, however like you say doesn't make them reasonable. That at least includes all meals and nappies provided whereas I know some nurseries charge the same and don't provide lunch or nappies.

I still haven't got used to the exorbitant cost of childcare as I paid roughly half in Australia as it's heavily subsided by the government there.

@Clara91 The OP said herself the nursery is open until 6. She collected her DC early.
4.30-6 is not last minute tidying up times. Yes structured learning activities will have wound up by then because some children will be collected 5ish onward generally. No-one is saying there should be full on activities until 5.59pm.

Nurseries who need 90 minutes of sticking kids in front of tv for cleaning and tidying up are doing something wrong. The fact the staff aren’t paid for cleaning time after 6 doesn’t make it ok to cut corners for 90 minutes beforehand.

OP I don't think you're unreasonable. It would annoy me too... one of the reasons I like nursery is that they organise much better activities than I do 😂
Your fees sound similar to ours

[quote JustLyra]@Clara91 The OP said herself the nursery is open until 6. She collected her DC early.
4.30-6 is not last minute tidying up times. Yes structured learning activities will have wound up by then because some children will be collected 5ish onward generally. No-one is saying there should be full on activities until 5.59pm.

Nurseries who need 90 minutes of sticking kids in front of tv for cleaning and tidying up are doing something wrong. The fact the staff aren’t paid for cleaning time after 6 doesn’t make it ok to cut corners for 90 minutes beforehand.[/quote]
I understand but 6 is when they lock up and stop being paid, when should they start tidying if not half 4? It won't be last minute tidying, in my experience they have to go stick on an hour+ cycle of washing of bedding, bibs, aprons and soft furnishings, hoover, mop, steam clean, paperwork, plan ahead for the next day/week. Like I said, my son's nursery had half an hour of TV while the bulk of tidying was done and then all remaining children went into the one room and played, you can't assume it's 90+ minutes of TV. I just think there's a lot of work that goes on that we're unaware of and I'm grateful for it.

@Clara91 I’ve worked in childcare and schools for my entire adult life. I’m very aware of what is going on.

It appears from the OP’s experiences of collecting her child that they use the tv for a long period at the end of the day. That’s not acceptable.

The staff shouldn’t be tidying/cleaning/planning for the last 90 minutes of the day that people are paying for childcare for. Any nursery manager or owner who has that set up is one of the ones that takes the piss.

I don’t know any decent childcare facility where the nursery room staff are responsible for hoovering, mopping and steam cleaning (other than for spot cleans for spills) while the children are still there.

Again - would people accept hoovering, mopping and steam cleaning around them when out for a meal? Or at the end of a cinema trip? Absolutely not.

General tidying and planning is one thing - the complete cleaning of the building shouldn’t be happening while there are children to be cared for.

Do you have experience of the private sector? These things are commonplace. Managers (but more so private owners) do take the piss but I'm not going to fault staff that try their best. I keep saying it wasn't 90 minutes in my experience, just that TV was used between half 4 and 5. Between 5 and 6 the small amount of remaining children would go into one room and do something.

Yes I do.

If you read what I said you’ll see that at no point did I directly criticise the individual staff.

From the looks of it the OP’s nursery uses tv for a large chunk of time. Which is completely unacceptable and is taking the piss.

You've been very fortunate @JustLyra, I don't know of any private day nursery where childcare staff haven't been responsible for hoovering and mopping while children are there.
Very unusual to have dedicated cleaners in the private sector and very unusual for staff to be paid after nursery closing.

Maybe they have a 20 min tv session? Why not just ask
They can play all day and then have some tv time, the only way you will find out how much they watch is to ask

Why do people have such an issue with peopa pig ? My sons are 18 and 16 and watched peppa pig when younger , they are fine , its a cartoon , my kids always understood a cartoon was just that

Ours will have a story or Nursery Rhymes on the screen for the last 10/15 minutes before pick up as the staff are all doing things like finding jumpers, organising lunchboxes, putting on coats etc. (As an aside, please please please label your child’s belongings)
Not just cartoons though - something a bit more educational.

I would be annoyed.

You are NOT being unreasonable. I'd be really annoyed if I found my children's nursery was putting the TV on for them. That's not what I'm paying 3k a month for (2 children close in age). I let my boys watch a little TV each week but that's on the assumption that they are not watching any at nursery. If your nursery needs to put on the TV to entertain the kids for 90 mins (or whatever you said) while they tidy up at the end of the day (as previous posters suggested), they are understaffed to an unacceptable level.

You've actually make me think about my sons' nursery. I had just assumed they don't watch any TV - as I assumed any decent childcare provider wouldn't- but now I realise I've never actually asked the question. Will ask for confirmation of this next week. Thanks OP for raising it!

Nope not fine. I wouldn’t be happy if nursery gave my DD screen time. We are strict on screens. She is only allowed screens during FaceTime calls. I read it adversely affects them before the age of 2. Our toddler is 16 months.

Under 3s are meant to have zero screen time. I would be really annoyed but I haven't let any of my children use screens that young.

As a former nursery teacher ,I would say this is fine for a short while. Children are super excited at home time ,and staff are busy clearing up and getting everything ready. No biggie ,if dc are happy there