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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect my child doesn't watch tele at nursery?

129 replies

Ralph871 · 08/10/2021 18:08

My almost 3 year old has been attending the same nursery since we moved back to the UK from Australia last year. I'm happy with the nursery and he really likes it there, his wee brother who is 18 months started going a few months ago and I've had no complaints however tonight when I picked him up he was sat with 5 other kids watching cartoons on a large computer monitor, this is the third night in as many weeks that this has been the case.

He watches Tele at home of course although we do try to be on the stricter side but regardless of that Am I being unreasonable to expect that he doesn't watch tele at nursery?

I'm currently paying £1200 per month for them both to attend three days each as I work full time nightshift, kind of pisses me off to pay over a third of my salary to childcare and then find him sat watching tele.

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 08/10/2021 22:38

It was a Mr Bean cartoon that I had never even seen before, previously it was the movie Sing which we watch often at home and I wasn't too bothered by that so is it the principle that he should be made to do activities for 8 hours bar food, or what he was watching?

kirinm · 08/10/2021 23:53

I'd also be annoyed if I found out my DD's nursery was letting her watch TV. I remember seeing one nursery where the babies room had a massive screen and the babies were just sat staring at it. I can't get my head around that at all!

5zeds · 08/10/2021 23:59

I agree with you @Ralph871 it doesn’t sound great at all, especially as most will watch some telly while their parents get food on the table. What’s wrong with reading them a story if they’re genuinely tired?

WTF475878237NC · 09/10/2021 00:07

I wouldn't be happy with this no. 45 minutes minimum? Too much. I wouldn't even be happy with 10 mins if I was paying for their care. I expect them to have enough staff on to do home time without mayhem, and clean up after the children have gone.

SirenSays · 09/10/2021 01:10

This is shocking to me! I have never worked in a nursery that had a television. At the end of the day one of us would take the children and read to them or sing songs while everyone else tidied and prepared for the following day.

MelKarnofskyCrane · 09/10/2021 01:14

Octonauts is awesome to be fair. My kids have learned loads from that.

Currently however my youngest has a full on obsession with Frozen. We have watched it at least once a day for the last two weeks. It makes her happy 🤷🏻‍♀️

Longdistance · 09/10/2021 01:14

My dds had this at nursery and now at ASC. Fridays are wind down time. They’d watch movies I hadn’t taken them to. They would’ve been home watching a tele/movie anyway.

RobinPenguins · 09/10/2021 01:15

@Yamaya

I think YANBU. I like that my child is having screen free time when at nursery.
I agree with this. They don’t use screens at DD’s nursery except for occasionally looking something up on a kindle to show the children (this week it was a rocket launch). She watches TV at home, there’s no need for it in a childcare setting.
GoBrookeYourself · 09/10/2021 03:39

I agree with you OP and it’s a reason we discounted a nursery whilst looking round.

To the PP who said it’s good enough for at hone, why not nursery? Because nursery is paid childcare so a completely different situation. Are there any other nurseries you could send them to?

fourminutestosavetheworld · 09/10/2021 04:03

I wouldn't mind if it was a high-quality programme for the last half hour of a long, productive day.

I don't think the telly should be on 90 mins before hometime, and I don't think it should be Mr Bean.

OP, why don't you just ask the nursery about it? I would do it in a way that doesn't make you feel like a dick if it turns out that there was a reasonable explanation, a one-off reason why they needed the tv to babysit the children that afternoon. But I would certainly mention it so they're made aware that at least one parent noticed and didn't approve. If it continues, I guess you have no option but to look for alternative provision.

underneaththeash · 09/10/2021 06:20

I don't mind the last 15 minutes or so, but that is a long time before home time.

I'd definitely bring it up.

SaraSidleWillows · 09/10/2021 08:40

@HumphreysCorner

I work in a preschool and after a busy day we sit the children down and watch Phonics. Today we went for a long walk and let them watch a bit of Peppa Pig with a drink and a biscuit. Wasn't long until they left it and started playing again. Happy children 👶
I don’t mind if they put on some cartoons but for PEPPA PIG I’d be finding a new nursery! This far I’ve managed to keep her away
WhyOhWhyOhWhyyyy · 09/10/2021 08:48

YANBU OP. I’d be really annoyed if I found out DDs nursery was letting them watch TV. Read with them if they need to wind down.
I try to limit screen time through the week but it’s useful sometimes when I need a bit of a break for an hour on the days that she’s home with me. I’d be really resentful if I felt I couldn’t have that break because she’d already had the screen time at nursery.

SaraSidleWillows · 09/10/2021 08:54

That’s actually not true. I would mind. My nursery they put like read-along stories on the tv at home time and the kids are usually playing with things as well.

JustLyra · 09/10/2021 09:05

15 minutes before home time is fair enough, but an hour plus before the end of the day is far too much on a regular occasion.

Mine watch a lot of tv by MN standards and I still wouldn’t be happy with that.

sHREDDIES19 · 09/10/2021 09:21

Literally no issue with it when my two were in nursery years ago. Quite normal part of the day. Sounds a bit odd that your child is physically affected by the tv in terms of behaviour so I’d question what they are watching maybe? Something perhaps a bit gentler to unwind?

insancerre · 09/10/2021 09:29

At the moment, there is a bit of a recruitment crisis going on in early years
It might be that the only way they can manage the staffing is to put the children together and watch tv at the end of the day
It might be that the staff are having to do cleaning as well, which is hard to do with children to look after
It’s not ideal but it’s a means to an end
Maybe speak to the manager to let them know you would prefer your children not to watch tv at the nursery

bedroomnc · 09/10/2021 09:55

At my nursery in the colder and darker months we used to do 'movie night' on a Friday after tea.

We always did a deeper clean on a Friday and there was no other way to keep the children settled and contained while we did it as quick as we could. It was only for around 30 minutes.

In the summer it wasn't a problem as we could just go outside for a bit longer with them.

We would also occasionally do it depending on the numbers. So in the school holidays when all the funded children were off the nursery was much quieter. As it was school holidays we'd let them watch an episode or two of paw patrol for some quiet time while the other children slept. Not regularly though.

Original poster
Ralph871 · 09/10/2021 10:34

@sHREDDIES19

Literally no issue with it when my two were in nursery years ago. Quite normal part of the day. Sounds a bit odd that your child is physically affected by the tv in terms of behaviour so I’d question what they are watching maybe? Something perhaps a bit gentler to unwind?
@sHREDDIES19

It's actually not odd in the slightest. I am a member of a Facebook group for limiting screen time that has about 100k plus members and it's very common for young children to have adverse reactions and behaviour issues when they watch too much television, particularly fast paced, instant gratification type programmes like paw patrol.

The more he is outside playing, exploring and expending energy the better mood he is in. Not really rocket science.

OP posts:
HomeSliceKnowsBest · 09/10/2021 10:39

YANBU OP.

Hardbackwriter · 09/10/2021 10:40

I am a member of a Facebook group for limiting screen time that has about 100k plus members

Is this not a bit ironic...?

Interesting that lots of people are saying this is a Friday thing - one of my friends whose child goes to the same nursery insists she hears TV at pick-up sometimes (we still do pick-up without going in the building but you can hear them) and I thought it was part of her general paranoia because they're always playing when I go but her child goes on a Friday and mine doesn't so maybe she is right!

BustopherPonsonbyJones · 09/10/2021 10:48

I don’t see a problem with TV at the end of the day to calm them down and allow tidying up/dismissal of children but if you do, why don’t you ask them how long the children sit and watch TV? Then you have three options: suck it up (if nursery spaces are scarce near you and they don’t need your money), leave (if there are other options best suited to your parenting style) or ask for different activities (if you think they will listen and would like to keep your business). If you feel strongly enough about this to be in a campaign group, I’d consider finding alternative provision.

EmeraldShamrock · 09/10/2021 10:51

I think it gives them some relaxing time.
It could be exhausting constant simulation excluding nap time.
My DC school has a movie Friday plus rainy days and sporadically at the end of term.

PearandHoney · 09/10/2021 10:56

I once worked in the nursery class of a smart (v.expensive) independent school. They had Peppa Pig on every day in the late morning. I don’t think the parents even realised it happened. I think a lot of parents sending their children to nurseries really aren’t aware of the activities their children are engaged in.

MarleneDietrichsSmile · 09/10/2021 11:05

I think a lot of parents expect higher standards from nursery than they set themselves

Same with nannies. I don’t know a single parent who never is on their phone whilst minding their kids, yet they expect nanny to engage non-stop with the child

I think it’s unrealistic expectations

If you don’t like it you can change childcare provider

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