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Original poster

Big row about expensive belt

456 replies

PegorySpeck · 05/10/2021 20:31

DS 17 loves expensive clothes and designer labels. He currently wants a Louis Vuitton belt which costs £400. His Dad and I think it’s ridiculous to spend this amount of money on a belt. He asked us if he could have it for Christmas we said no. He knows our budget for him and his brother is £500 each so he has asked why as it’s within budget. We have responded because it’s a ridiculous waste of money.

He has a part time job and earns about £150 per week. He has just taken on an extra shift because he wants extra money for the belt. His Dad is going mad at him saying how stupid it is, but I guess it’s his money and therefore his choice.

He has now said we are completely unreasonable and have no right to tell him what he can do with his money. It’s all blown up into a massive argument and no-one is talking. He is now saying we are favouring his brother as we have already got his Christmas present which cost £500 which he saw arrive in the post a few days ago.

I don’t know how I can fix this? What should I do?

OP posts:
OnTheBoardwalk · 05/10/2021 22:48

You want to buy him what you want to buy him rather than what he actually wants?

Up to you what you buy him but don’t tell him what he has to spend if you can decide what random unwanted things he will get

AndOtherStories · 05/10/2021 22:48

A £400 really good quality belt is a much better use of £400 than some tech that will be obsolete in a few years and definitely better use than lots of "stuff" he doesn't really want.

I mean I wouldn't spend that on a belt myself, but if I was going to spend £400 on a present that's exactly the kind of thing it should be.

GatoradeMeBitch · 05/10/2021 22:48

If it's a classic design he might use it for the rest of his life, and not waste hundreds of pounds on cheaply made belts that wear out.

The only place your DH was out of order was in "going mad" at him about what he spends his own money on.

Rivermonsters · 05/10/2021 22:49

@JesusIsAnyNameFree depends on the seller, stuff on auction can be Authentic. You just have to know what you’re looking for

SpiceRat · 05/10/2021 22:49

A decent belt will last a long time - unlike the PS5
Well to be fair it was 7 years in between PS4 and 5 and most consoles will survive that time, even longer. I’ve still got working consoles from the 80s/ / 90s. misses point of thread

GatoradeMeBitch · 05/10/2021 22:50

A £400 really good quality belt is a much better use of £400 than some tech that will be obsolete in a few years and definitely better use than lots of "stuff" he doesn't really want.

Good point. The belt will almost definitely outlive the PS5.

The family shouldn't disrespect what he values just because it's different to what they value.

Redjumper1 · 05/10/2021 22:51

Yabu or your DH is. It's a belt not cocaine although if you are giving him vodka maybe you would be happy with cocaine.

Cherrysoup · 05/10/2021 22:51

His choice to spend money on what he wants, fair play to him taking on an extra shift to get it. You don’t need to get it. If he’s paying for himself, why worry?

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 05/10/2021 22:54

[quote Rivermonsters]@JesusIsAnyNameFree depends on the seller, stuff on auction can be Authentic. You just have to know what you’re looking for[/quote]
Can be but rarely is. The amount of stuff on ebay that claims to be the real deal but very clearly isn't is shocking.

GatoradeMeBitch · 05/10/2021 22:54

although if you are giving him vodka maybe you would be happy with cocaine

That's quite a leap Shock

Hear that OP? Try to remember to pick up a few wraps next time you go to Tesco OK?

Rivermonsters · 05/10/2021 22:55

@JesusIsAnyNameFree true, worth a shot tho

StoneofDestiny · 05/10/2021 22:55

If the belt is £400, how much are the trousers they are holding up?

DirtyDancing · 05/10/2021 22:57

I have a rather expensive Gucci belt. To be fair I didn't buy it till I was in my 30s. He's doing well to get one at 17! But, I only need and have ever used the one classic belt in the decade + I've owned it. It's in budget, let him have it

Original poster
PegorySpeck · 05/10/2021 22:57

@StoneofDestiny

If the belt is £400, how much are the trousers they are holding up?
£90
OP posts:
mobear · 05/10/2021 22:58

If your budget is £500 and he wants a belt that is £400, buy him the belt. He may be someone who likes to buy a few nice things (which is fine) rather than masses of not so nice things (which is also fine), or he might not be. He might use that belt for the next 20 years, or use it for 6 months and realise it was a waste. He's figuring it out. It's part of growing up. I don't think you should be making that decision for him at 17.

Joystir59 · 05/10/2021 22:58

£500 each for Christmas is ridiculously spoilt. You've created a spoilt man child.

VividImaginationAgain · 05/10/2021 23:00

I’m thankful my three are happy with Matalan!

Skinnytailedsquirrel · 05/10/2021 23:00

Parents spend £500 on each kid for "christmas". Insane and horrid.

SueblueNZ · 05/10/2021 23:01

The hypocrisy in attitude between a belt that is useful and will last versus expensive vodka that will be peed away, is mind blowing.

ChaoBella · 05/10/2021 23:01

YABU to get angry with him for working shifts to buy a stupidly expensive belt. It will be a good life lesson for him to work a load of shifts and blow the lot on a belt. Budgeting is an important skill and wasting money as a youngster is part of the learning curve.

YANBU to refuse to buy it for him for Christmas. However you might have created this problem for yourself. You need to make it clear that the £500 budget is on the assumption that the items are a reasonable price for what they are. Yes son we will buy you a new laptop or TV for £400 because that is roughly how much they cost. No son there is not a cats chance in hell we are buying a belt for £400.

Original poster
PegorySpeck · 05/10/2021 23:01

@Joystir59

£500 each for Christmas is ridiculously spoilt. You've created a spoilt man child.
I think most parents spend what they can afford on their children at Christmas

My boys are not spoilt at all. They are lucky we have plenty of money but they are lovely young men and I am proud of them

OP posts:
Original poster
PegorySpeck · 05/10/2021 23:02

@Skinnytailedsquirrel

Parents spend £500 on each kid for "christmas". Insane and horrid.
Awful to refer to your child as ‘each kid’ eurgh
OP posts:
mobear · 05/10/2021 23:02

My boys are not spoilt at all. They are lucky we have plenty of money but they are lovely young men and I am proud of them

If you truly think this then why not let him have the belt he wants?

DaphneDeloresMoorhead · 05/10/2021 23:03

@Happylittlethoughts

*cocaine ... not cochineal! My autocorrect
I did think "who on earth uses £400 of cochineal and what are they using it for ?" 😂
ArianaDumbledore · 05/10/2021 23:04

Would you mind if it was a bag?
Because a belt is hard to lose, and can be used frequently. Can be covered up easily from a theft pov.
Possibly good motivation to keep weight steady (assuming he's not under/over).
I can think of worse things really.