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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to camp this month

136 replies

Benjaminbutton12 · 05/10/2021 08:08

Going away for a couple of nights later this month, basically my partner wants to camp, I don’t. I’ve said I’m willing to pay the difference for a hotel but he sees it as a waste of money. Not even a fancy hotel, just somewhere to put our heads.
I’m just worried it will be freezing and damp,and since we don’t drive it’s a lot of equipment to lug on the train for 6h.
We can’t seem to come to an agreement, what would you do? Has anybody camped late October and found it ok?

OP posts:
FangsForTheMemory · 05/10/2021 10:33

I'd book a nice B&B and tell him you'll be sleeping there and he's welcome to join you or sleep in his tent. His choice.

AuditAngel · 05/10/2021 10:34

2 years ago DS camped last weekend in October for his DOE . They had rain, snow, sleet and hail.

IsabellesMissingSock · 05/10/2021 10:39

Sounds awful. What's the purpose of this endurance test?

FluffyPersian · 05/10/2021 10:47

We were meant to be camping last weekend. I can cope with rain, but not wind - when I saw it was supposed to be torrential rain and wind, I emailed the campsite, apologising and saying we weren't coming (we'd already paid full balance and I wasn't expecting it to be refunded so just courtesy - only £45 for 2 nights) and booked a Travelodge for £45 for a night.

We drove up on the Friday, did loads of stuff, stayed in the clean, comfy Travelodge, did loads more stuff and came back home on Saturday night - Best decision ever. We felt chilled, had a great time and didn't have a wet and muddy tent to sort out. We also had a lovely hot shower in the Travelodge and slept very well.

We've had 8 camping holidays this year, some staying at multiple campsites over a long weekend so I love camping, but at the moment it's too wet and getting too cold for me. I would want to stay in a hotel as well.

goawayalcg · 05/10/2021 10:57

Camping in October isn't my idea of fun, but add to that the fact you'd don't drive?!? No way.

BiddyPop · 05/10/2021 11:01

I camp, and have done a night in a tent in early March when there aren't enough beds in the hostel (a few times - as the only girl leader, i magnanimously draw the short straw if gender breakdown means only 1 bedroom available for Leaders, if it's attrocious I could sleep on the dining room floor). It's blinkin' cold at that time of year. And in October (have done that too in the past).

And I come by car, with a good sleeping bag (4 season), 2 sleeping mats, blanket for on top, woolly hat and thick socks and thermals layers (yes, layerS), hot water bottle to fill from stove at bedtime, and knowing there is a hot shower I can use in the morning.....

If I was going by 3 trains, carrying it all, no way. It would cost more than £65 to get decent kit to not make it miserable. (And even if you have sleeping bags, they are likely not full 4 season ones, only summer weight or festival type ones so you'd want at least another blanket on top).

NerrSnerr · 05/10/2021 11:04

I love camping but there's no way I'd camp in October with no car and a long journey on the train. It'll be awful.

LagunaBubbles · 05/10/2021 11:04

What's the trip for I.e why does your partner want to go camping now?

Greatdomestic · 05/10/2021 11:07

This is an endurance test, not a fun few days away.

Lugging all that stuff on x3 trains is madness.

As many have said, you will spend way more than 65 to get all the stuff you need.

Is it a well equipped site you are going to?

End of October in the UK, would be a firm no from me. Get that hotel booked op.

helpfulperson · 05/10/2021 11:12

It's not so much whether caming in October is OK, it's that you don't want to do it and he doesn't care about that. I'd honestly be considering the future of the relationship.

Gonnagetgoing · 05/10/2021 11:12

I camped from the age of approx 6 to 12 with my DPs and DB. We mainly went in summer/spring - never autumn. Even in spring/summer it could be cold and very rainy so I'd never camp late October!

It's only been in recent years that I very occasionally camp with friends/partners and in summer/spring. I certainly wouldn't be doing a train trip with 3 changes. Go glamping or Air BnB instead.

Hoppinggreen · 05/10/2021 11:14

I won’t camp in the height of summer never mind in October
He’s a stingy git and it’s not attractive

WhereYouLeftIt · 05/10/2021 11:14

@Benjaminbutton12

All the hotels round there are pretty extortionate, it’s 3 changes on the train to get there too. It’s just making me not look forward to the trip
Going away for a couple of nights is supposed to be fun. A nice thing to do. Pleasant.

Six hours on four different trains lugging a rucksack does not sound fun to me. And your partner doesn't sound much fun either. Or pleasant. Stinginess is a bad trait, which tends to get worse with time.

"We have a tent and sleeping bags atm, so we still need to buy a lot of equipment. Which will end up as more expensive than a hotel I imagine, even if we can use it again. Maybe I am being too negative though"
So you don't have a lot of the equipment? Sounds to me like you're not regular campers then. Is it the first time he's gone proper camping? I'm imagining he has a rosy view. Possibly not an accurate one.

"We can’t seem to come to an agreement, what would you do? "
I would wave him off from train station number one and wish him a lovely time. What I would not do is go camping with him.

thing47 · 05/10/2021 11:15

I was brought up camping and quite enjoy it. DH thinks it is hell on earth and refuses point blank Smile

He just says 'no thanks' whenever I ask him about camping, and that's fine, he's a grown man and he gets to decide what he does and does not like doing. So do you.

FateHasRedesignedMost · 05/10/2021 11:18

Camping in October sounds miserable! If you do go make sure you have proper down sleeping bags, thermal base layers, thermal socks, fleece layers and maybe one of those blanket hoodies. And air beds to raise you off the cold damp ground! And of course, a tent that doesn’t leak. Wellies. Waterproof trousers as well as jacket.

Camping without a car, a 6 hour train journey with all your stuff sounds horrendous. What if there’s a storm or tent leaks or one of you gets ill, you’ll have no decent shelter and no way of getting home quickly? Can’t you at least hire a car, or better yet a caravan/motor home? Or go to a static caravan park?

rookiemere · 05/10/2021 11:21

Tell your DP if you camp in the cold and the rain you'll never go camping again. If he's trying to convert you to it , this is the opposite of the way to go about it.

Mamamamasaurus · 05/10/2021 11:23

Going camping and carrying all your shit on a train? Fuck that. We go camping most years and we have a car - that's stressful enough without us having to literally carry what we take.

Glamping. Or stay closer. Or change dates and get a cheaper hotel.

AnathemaPulsifer · 05/10/2021 11:34

I wouldn’t camp at this time of year with all my comfy kit filling the car, I 100% definitely would not camp at this time of year with the sort of camping kit you could lug on the train.

Leftbutcameback · 05/10/2021 11:48

We camped in a big group the first weekend of may a couple of years ago. It was 1degree overnight. Children were crying in their tents because they were cold. I had an airbed, sleeping bag, duvet, hat and hot water bottle. Still too cold. Never camping again. Premier inn for me!

PennyPooBags · 05/10/2021 12:00

Is he nuts?

ChaToilLeam · 05/10/2021 12:38

Tell him no! It will be shit. What absolute madness, camping at the end of October (or any time of year really).

BoomChicka · 05/10/2021 12:41

Hell would freeze over first. Are you going to a specific event, because the train sounds crappy with so many changes too!

theruffles · 05/10/2021 13:03

We went camping a few weeks ago and there's no way we could have managed all the stuff on a train. We have quite a big tent but you'd need a camping stove, pots/pans/etc, airbed or something to cushion the ground (it'll be cold and hard with just a sleeping bag), your clothes/etc, gas for the stove... It's likely to be cold and damp and if you don't really enjoy the thought of camping you might find the reality quite difficult in October when the weather is turning. I'd look into glamping or a bed and breakfast.

BrightYellowDaffodil · 05/10/2021 13:28

I love camping but wild horses couldn't drag me to a tent in October unless it was absolutely necessary.

I certainly wouldn't be wanting to camp with someone who has demonstrated that they're a stubborn arse, because you just know they're the sort who have no idea what sort of equipment is necessary to camp in bad weather.

averylongtimeago · 05/10/2021 13:31

I have camped in all seasons (Guide and Ranger leader) and would say absolutely don't go!

I doubt very much he has good quality 4 or 3 season equipment, and to buy it can be expensive!

As for lugging it all on a train- what planet is he on?

I remember 1 weekend in late November- it poured with rain, then froze. I slept in my clothes, with a hat, gloves, blankets and an enormous 15 tog duvet and it was still chilly. My water bottle froze overnight.
We had an indoor kitchen and dining area to retreat to- a godsend!