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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU just to chuck it all in the bin?

300 replies

fedupwithit8 · 28/09/2021 23:43

I have two kids under three, have been living in a pigsty for years and am desperate to declutter and live in a more orderly house. I finally got round to sorting out the babies stuff and have a huge pile of things we don’t need anymore - including clothes they’ve grown out of, toys they no longer use, random bits and pieces like car seat inserts, pram seat connectors and more.

I’m desperate to have a clearer, tidier house as we’re wallowing in crap we don’t use. But I simply don’t have time to sort it all out properly and take it to the appropriate places like the charity shop, the dump etc. I’ve been meaning to for months and it’s never happened because we’re just so busy.

AIBU to just shove it all in 5-6 bin bags and get rid? Or should I really try to sort it all properly and dispose of it in better ways so other could potentially make use of it?

OP posts:
MrsGatsby99 · 29/09/2021 05:01

Is there anyone sympathetic that can help you go through it, either by looking after the DC for half a day/ day or physically helping ypu go through it?
Bags for recycling/ box for charity/ another bag for landfill. Label them.

Normally, i'd say 15 minutes per day x 5 days per week is the best so you make a difference but it isn't overwhelming - the idea is it took you a while to accumulate the mess, it takes a while to get rid of it and that's ok. But think you need to make a big dent for your mental health, maybe so setting aside half a day/ a day at a weekend might help.

How much stuff are we talking about? If there's a lot and you can afford it, you could consider one of those Hippobag things for the landfill. But in any case, know your exits, if it's doing car runs to the tip, are you doing it or can someone help?

Best wishes, op. Progress not perfection.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 29/09/2021 05:01

does the tip have a textiles bin, bin for clothes and waste bin for pram inserts?

lljkk · 29/09/2021 05:04

I'm confused. OP already did the sorting. She has a giant pile ready to bag off.

3 pictures of existing pile & offer on local Facebook for free as a job lot that must go together, suitable for carboot or charity shop. Give it all to person who says they will collect soonest. Bag it as OP wants, hand it out the door when someone arrives to collect. This is less effort than making a trip to tip.

MyOtherProfile · 29/09/2021 05:16

Invite a helpful friend over for coffee, sort stuff into different bags while you chat and then post on FB, contact a local charity for baby stuff and bin the tat.

Lovinghannah · 29/09/2021 05:18

What Lemonjuice said.
If you can't bear to throw it, you can advertise on fb swap shop to pay someone to take it to the tip?

Chunkymenrock · 29/09/2021 05:19

Freecycle is great.

Marchitectmummy · 29/09/2021 05:30

Don't just bin it all without trying, think of the environment and also how you may be able to help others.

Take a couple of pictures and fling it on Facebook selling pages if you can't do more put for free and someone will take it all and sell it themselves.

Joystir59 · 29/09/2021 05:50

I'd bin it all personally. I've done so myself this last year trying to declutter my own house with very little energy due to bereavement.

MyCatEatsPrawnCrackers · 29/09/2021 05:59

For all the clothes, use a collection service like icollectclothes. You book a collection, bag it all up and leave the bags outside. Book online and they give you a time slot when they collect it. You don't have to sort the clothes out and they collect within a couple of days.

dentydown · 29/09/2021 06:06

Some places have bin dumps for clothes. (Just don’t over fill the sacks. Some take soft toys and bedding as well. The problem for me with chucking clothes away is there would be no room for actual household rubbish!

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 29/09/2021 06:09

Do you have any friends with any time to come round and help you blast through it? get it sorted in one hit, see friend, have chat and possibly glass of wine if wanted, and friend might even oblige by taking some of it away for you!

Banani · 29/09/2021 06:13

Please don’t send useable stuff to landfill, not without at least trying to move it on to someone who can use it first. As many have said, Facebook giving pages or free cycle are good for this. Agree eBay just isn’t worth the faff for a few quid.

Gufo · 29/09/2021 06:14

Please don't bin usable stuff. If you don't have time or inclination to sort or list, just put it for free on freecycle or marketplace as bundles of kids stuff / gardening stuff / Womenswear. Or stick the whole lot up as a bundle for car boot sellers.

TintinIsBack · 29/09/2021 06:22

Just bin it.

The people who are giving you ideas about splitting bags, separating charity and no. Charity worthy stuff etc… obvioulsy haven’t read your OP properly.
I’d put the clearing out as a priority. Having a space where you and your dcs feel comfortable.

Once things are clearer, THEN, I’d make a point of doing small clearing out throughout the year and give it to charities etc…
(I use to do that about twice a year when moving from winter to summer and summer to winter)

snowblack · 29/09/2021 06:24

Do you have storage space like an attic where you can shove it and forget it for a year or two?

No! Absolutely do NOT do this. Bin it, and in the future try not to keep so much crap you don’t need.

TintinIsBack · 29/09/2021 06:25

@Gufo

Please don't bin usable stuff. If you don't have time or inclination to sort or list, just put it for free on freecycle or marketplace as bundles of kids stuff / gardening stuff / Womenswear. Or stick the whole lot up as a bundle for car boot sellers.
That STILL requires to sort stuff out though.

It’s not an issue of ‘inclination’ for the OP. It’s time. The stuff has already been waiting for months for her to ‘try and sort it out’. It’s not going to happen just because she can sort it out by theme and give it away in freecycle rather than by charities.

Plus putting stuff on freecycle, organising collection etc… also takes time!

LittleLottieChaos · 29/09/2021 06:25

Sorry but everyone saying ‘just bin it’ is a tool. If there’s useable goods, clothes etc you can even arrange a collection from a charity who can sell/distribute the items. Honestly, you have kids under 3 … have you read the news recently, it’s looking a bit bleak. Do your small bit.

lnsufficientFuns · 29/09/2021 06:30

If you have the cash.... get a skip!
£200 for a few weeks - well worth it

Peoniesandpeaches · 29/09/2021 06:34

@DifferentHair

YABU. It's a crappy thing to create landfill when you don't need to. It's selfish to throw away something that could help a person in need.

Set aside 30 minutes when the children are in bed. Put things in two piles (bin & charity shop- you don't need to sell anything or give to friends, that's just more faff).

I'm a mother of young kids too, and I know everyone rushes forward to say 'you've got enough on your plate - choose the easy route' to mums. But I don't think that's cool when it comes to the environment- your children need to live on this planet long after we leave it. You're deliberately creating trash that will outlive them and that sucks IMO.

I agree. It would take less time to sort it this way than to create a post complaining you have no time.
DifferentHair · 29/09/2021 06:35

'Ten bin bags of random stuff is not going to save the environment.'

True. But the attitude of 'hey ho I'll buy a bunch of stuff I don't need, only to complain that it didn't magically dissipate when I stopped using it- oh well! Let's bin it' is absolutely screwing the environment and one of the main reasons the environment needs saving at all.

OP, spend the time to dispose of this stuff thoughtfully. It's not asking a lot.

And next time you're tempted to buy something, remember this feeling and have a plan for what will happen to the item long term before you decide to bring it home.

Sunnysideup999 · 29/09/2021 06:37

Bin it and clear your head. Don’t think any more about it.

FiddlefigOnTheRoof · 29/09/2021 06:40

There’s a middle path between binning everything or eBaying individual pieces, sort them into 1) wearable clothes (of all sizes) for charity and toys/items that a charity shop could use 2) textiles for scrap, 3) bin everything else

Bonbon21 · 29/09/2021 06:42

Right now your mental health is more important than a teensie tiny contribution to the environment..
Bin it... all of it...
Sort out the house.
Sort out your head..
Then when you are all ready and organised you can work towards reclaiming your halo...

Dont feel guilty.
Good Luck moving forward.

TeddyBeans · 29/09/2021 06:44

I see Facebook adverts for 'carboot items' loads. They're usually a mash of all sorts of stuff people don't want to spend time dealing with. Still better than dumping useable items imo

TintinIsBack · 29/09/2021 06:45

@LittleLottieChaos

Sorry but everyone saying ‘just bin it’ is a tool. If there’s useable goods, clothes etc you can even arrange a collection from a charity who can sell/distribute the items. Honestly, you have kids under 3 … have you read the news recently, it’s looking a bit bleak. Do your small bit.
From what the OP said, if she isn’t binning stuff, it will just carry in cluttering her house instead. It’s not going to save the planet like this either.

Plus, I’ll be honest, I think that all this giving away to charity (for environmental reasons) is hypocritical if you don’t buy most of the stuff you have from a charity shop yourself.
Much better to buy fewer things, never give them to charity because you’ve worn them out than constantly buying fast fashion and ‘give away to charity’ stuff you’ve only worn twice (or sometimes never because quite a lot if the clothes in charity shops stil have labels on!)

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