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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that grown men on trains shouldn't behave like this?

148 replies

Iamnotminterested · 26/09/2021 00:27

I travelled from Euston to Manchester this evening. Within 2 minutes of getting on the train most of the seats around me were taken by football fans who'd travelled down to watch Man City v Chelsea, who pretty much straight away cracked open can after can of lager and shouted/responded football chants down the carriage...except that these weren't young fans, but rather men in their 50s and 60s who quite frankly were a fucking embarrassment, and I as a single female traveller mid-carriage felt mightily uncomfortable.

AIBU to think that men of this age should get a grip and not behave on public transport this way, and make me (and the other women who I spoke to after at Piccadilly) feel uncomfortable and glad to arrive?

OP posts:
Goldbar · 26/09/2021 14:45

Absolutely horrible behaviour and it doesn't make any difference whether it's men or women.

When sharing confined public spaces, people should act with consideration for others.

I don't allow my 3yo to lurch about the carriage, shout and sing noisily and annoy other passengers. Why should grown adults get away with this? If my DC was yelling, shouting and watching his tablet on high volume, we would rightly be disapproved of by other passengers and yet arguably that's not as intimidating as a group of loud drink adults

Original poster
Iamnotminterested · 26/09/2021 14:51

To clarify, a lot of the men were moving around the carriage, cue regular bums in my face as I had an aisle seat, belching and farting and lurching as the train moved. The train looked full from where I was sitting so little chance of moving to a quieter carriage.

OP posts:
Macncheeseballs · 26/09/2021 14:54

I've encountered more groups of drunken men than women, and I would say the former is worse because it's more intimidating as a woman, although neither are great

PlayItCool · 26/09/2021 15:27

I hate getting on public transport with pissed up football fans. I've seen them hammering on the train windows and yelling aggressively as the train pulled into the platform before they piled on (fucking terrifying as I was in the carriage alone), harass a man in a wheelchair, punch through the ceiling of a tram carriage.

But the football is just an excuse for these arsehole men to behave badly. When it's a more mixed football crowd (inc women and kids) they are fine.

hangrylady · 26/09/2021 16:16

@Susannahmoody

Totally agree. Reason I'm glad we live abroad.
Yes because foreign football fans are so we'll behavedHmm
Geordieoldgirl · 26/09/2021 16:21

Boorish and inconsiderate behaviour.

Brokensunflower · 26/09/2021 16:22

It's sad that that sort of uncouth behaviour has a place on our society. A bit of class and behaving that a decent adult doesn't take much. You can enjoy your sport without hollering like a barely evolved cave man.

hennybeans · 26/09/2021 16:41

I'll preface this with the fact I didn't grow up in the UK, but I think all alcohol should be banned on public transportation and on airplanes and in airports.

There are so many great things about the UK, but the drinking culture is one of the worst. Why do we tolerate so much anti social behaviour? Why is it acceptable to drink pint after pint at 8am before boarding your flight, smelly and loud?

I am often in York and rarely take my DC there on the weekends anymore because of the drunk hen and stag parties in the middle of the day. Or dozens of drunk people pouring off the trains, dressed up headed to the races.

SusieBob · 26/09/2021 16:43

Football fans are pricks. Who knew.

GreatPotato · 26/09/2021 17:02

@SusieBob

Football fans are pricks. Who knew.
All of them? Every single one of the million plus people who watch regular football?

What other group could you write off like that?

SusieBob · 26/09/2021 17:05

Most of them seem to be. Tribalism at it's very worst.

SusieBob · 26/09/2021 17:07

And I'll write of any group who regularly behave as badly as the twats who spill out of the pubs and grounds with no regard for simple things like, I dunno, not being massive racists, not dropping cans of lager all over the fucking shop, who can't travel on a train without intimidating the fuck out the rest of the passengers and who can't travel to another country without trying to fight anything that looks at them funny.

GreatPotato · 26/09/2021 17:11

@SusieBob

Most of them seem to be. Tribalism at it's very worst.
You've done it again! If you've been in a train carriage with football fans you've seen maybe 60 of the noisiest drinkers from a crowd of anything up to 50000 people. The vast majority of whom will have driven to the ground and gone home and had a quiet tea with their family. Many will have taken kids to the game and numerous more are quite capable of having a few drinks without being anti social.

Yes, some behave badly, but that happens whenever crowds of that number gather, especially with alcohol small section let the others down. Music festivals, for example or town centre pubs at the weekend (much smaller numbers but often carnage). It's just that very few other events can regularly command such crowds.

AlCalavicci · 26/09/2021 17:35

I live very close to two very big football grounds and a cricket ground ( no prizes for guessing where I live Smile )

And like PP I have seen some atrocious behaviour from men and women supporting football and cricket .
One of the most scary was when I was on a train coming home from Southport when a mixed group decided to let off a flare on the train , the smoke made it impossible to see or breath , how no one was hurt by the flare I will never know but there were , understandably, quite a few hurt in the panic to get away from it.

After that I found a number for British Transport Police you can text if there is a issue on any public transport , 61016.
www.btp.police.uk/police-forces/british-transport-police/areas/campaigns/How-to-use-our-text-number/

And although I would hope that one text would be enough to get them to sort things out I appreciate this may not be the case esp when there are football matches / concerts / rallies etc on so the more people that can text about a issue on the train / bus / tram / underground the better .
I have only had to use it once when two guys were determined to put the other ones head through a window , both me and a lady sat near me ( that I had given the number to ) text the BTP and the came on to the train mob handed at the next stop and much to the relief and clapping of the passengers dragged , literally , the two idiots off .

SusieBob · 26/09/2021 17:44

"You've done it again!"

Yeah, I know. I don't apologise for assuming football fans are inconsiderate wankers; it's not like that's been proved again and again and again.

GreatPotato · 26/09/2021 17:49

@SusieBob

"You've done it again!"

Yeah, I know. I don't apologise for assuming football fans are inconsiderate wankers; it's not like that's been proved again and again and again.

Surely you mean some.

[[Here are loads of stories like this one
www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/speedo-wearing-everton-fan-handed-17612131]]

AmericanTie · 26/09/2021 17:54

#notallfans #discrimination #bekind

AmericanTie · 26/09/2021 17:56

Thanks for the tip about the coppers though. I'll definitely text them next time.

Jk987 · 26/09/2021 18:08

Sounds like they were having a good time. They didn't say anything offensive that you told us about so I think YABU. Definitely not an age issue, you can have fun with your mates when you're 100. I can see it might be annoying if you were hoping for a peaceful journey though.

cortex10 · 26/09/2021 18:15

We had this a few years ago on a trip to London. The football fans were already on the train when we joined it at 9.00am and shouting, singing and drinking - so much four a quiet start to our day trip we thought but hey ho.
However we had the misfortune to catch the same return train as them - that's when it got nasty as they been drinking all day. The volume was 100% louder and they were staggering up and down the aisles spilling drinks on other passengers and threatening anyone who complained. After an hour the train stopped and the police got on. They had been abusing the train manager when she tried to get them to move out of first class. In front of the louts the police asked if any passengers would like to make a formal complaint - rather than just turf them off. Unsurprisingly no one complained and the train continued on its journey as before.
As PPs have said these looked like people in their 40s ,50s and 60s including some women.

Kleptaklunky · 26/09/2021 18:16

Football supporters in general are boorish imbeciles

AlCalavicci · 26/09/2021 18:20

@SusieBob

"You've done it again!"

Yeah, I know. I don't apologise for assuming football fans are inconsiderate wankers; it's not like that's been proved again and again and again.

How do you know this ? While I agree some can be very inconsiderate, when you consider there is likely to be several football matches going on up and down the uk every weekend during the football season with thousands and thousands attending the games how do know all are inconsiderate.
You can not possibly know this for certain , manly because it is not true.
As I said upthread , I live very close to two grounds one of which holds around 55,000 ( and by most standards this is not a particularly big ground ) can you honesty say everyone of them is a inconsiderate wanker . You can not tar everyone with the same brush just because they are wearing a football shirt .

@AmericanTie, can you repost that link , the one you have posted is not working ( unless its just my phone been a awkward git )
I hope you never have to text the BTP , but it is usful to have the number on your phone , just in case you feel uncomfortable / threated by anyone ( not just footy fans )

lljkk · 26/09/2021 18:44

Loud & bums that move around ... meh.

WrongKindOfFace · 26/09/2021 18:59

I was also just coming to post the text number for the transport police. Definitely one to have saved on a phone.

WrongKindOfFace · 26/09/2021 19:00

And yes, being stuck with drunk men is awful.