What stupid things do you do that no one else knows about?

[FancySomeChips]

I used to be a party animal. LOVED clubbing every weekend (multiple times a week as a student), would dance for hours and laugh and laugh and laugh.

Tonight I am sitting in my cuddle chair putting chewits down my bra to warm them up before I eat them.
I’m home alone.

How life has changed.

Make me feel better, what weird stuff do you do that no one else knows about?!

This is the best thread ever! :)

I sometimes talk to inanimate objects - NOT on purpose*! I just forget for a moment that they cannot hear or understand me.

Eg; I said "thanks babe" to the toaster recently when the toast popped up

Also have had a little chat to the empty pushchair when I've just dropped of my DC.

*I did actually have a pot plant who I named Gavin and I might have talked to him. But I was a student at the time and Gavin really had personality for a plant...

Like a pp I have to shut the wardrobe doors when I’m in bed.

I also have to shut the utility room door, which is behind DDog’s bed in case he is scared that witches and monsters can see him 🤔.

When I was younger, if I touched something with one hand, I also had to touch it with the other.

My curtains and blinds have to be closed in such a way so that anyone looking in can’t see me.

I perform concerts for my dog when DH is out of the house. I'll sing along to music but I have an elaborate plotline going in my head where I'm at a small venue seeing a friend's band play but their lead singer is taken ill last minute and they ask me to stand in.

I'm not sure what local rock bands perform Taylor Swift songs but I use a bit of artistic licence

[quote Walkingalot]@ShinyMe - that's brilliant! Love a bit of Tom Jones.

My cat meows a lot. I meow back. This goes on for a long long time. Neighbours must think I'm nuts.

I can't sleep unless I have a bit of quilt scrunched up in front of my face and I hate my knee's touching each other so I have to tuck the quilt between my legs. My quilt looks a mess the minute I get in the bed.

Mars Bars - eat the chocolate off first, then the toffee. So am left with a disgusting looking slug. I can't eat them normally so never eat them in public.[/quote]
Are you me? Ido all these things, drives DH mad! And mars bars don't taste right if eaten normally!

Oh god another I’ve just thought of that’s really weird and I have no idea why I do it I’ve done it for as long as I can remember (so about 4/5ish); when I’m in the car (don’t drive, passenger) you know the white lines in the middle of the road that divide the lanes? Well I tense my thigh when going past each one but release when it’s the gap between each line. Oh my it’s so weird I don’t even have the words to explain what I mean!!!

I also sing to my cat. As does DH.
Funnily enough, similar to other posters I sing baby shark to the fluffy one but ‘Little cat do do do do do dooo”
DH likes to sing Tiny Dancer to him but substitutes the word panther for dancer

[quote TrueRefuge]@OuiOuiBonjour, you sound fantastic, I want to be your friend! Have you thought about local theatre/drama classes??[/quote]
Awwww thanks that's really sweet. I've been thinking of doing an Improv class, purely for fun and to have other people to play around with.

I actually had a fair bit of success in acting when I was a child and youngish adult, but hated the industry and I would develop terrible anxiety whenever I got a really big opportunity and I ended up running away from success. I don't think I have the right temperament or self esteem levels for that world. Way too thin skinned and self critical.

I enjoy my little kitchen performances and the odd comic moments for friends though. I like making people laugh.

I swear profusely, using awful language if I break something or hurt myself when I’m home alone! I also burp and fart so often that the poor dog takes no notice anymore😄
I have been known to give myself marks out of 10 for it…

I live in a flat and have two lights in the hallway. There's a single switch next to the front door which controls the light at the front door and a double switch halfway along which controls both lights. If both lights are on/off then the switches on the double MUST be facing the same way. If I'm going to bed and turning both lights off then I will have to turn the light on at the single light then turn it off at the double to make it like that if needed.

@Imfinallyhappy1

I like applying for jobs and interviewing. I have no intention of taking the job as I love where I work but I love prepping and asking questions and the general interview process.

@slashlover

I live in a flat and have two lights in the hallway. There's a single switch next to the front door which controls the light at the front door and a double switch halfway along which controls both lights. If both lights are on/off then the switches on the double MUST be facing the same way. If I'm going to bed and turning both lights off then I will have to turn the light on at the single light then turn it off at the double to make it like that if needed.

Yes!!

Yes patting magnificent oak trees and feeling the energy.

My current cat song is based on upsy daisy from in the night garden, coz well the cat is called Daisy... other variations include the sunshine song and Rosie & Jim but that's just development from the ones I sang to my babies

Laughing like a loon @ Sir Cuddlington of Cuddlemore. A name which will certainly not be imitated in this house, No sirree :) :)

Also, as 29 year old I still feel the urge to run up the stairs when I've locked the doors and turned the light out. It feels as if someone is waiting at the bottom and as soon as the lights go out they will chase me up

@Neron

If there's 2 items left on a shelf, that I only need to purchase 1 of - I have to take them both. Can't leave 1, it will get lonely...

So pleased to read this and then so many others saying the same - I have found my people!

@LadyMonicaBaddingham

I sing to my cat. About my cat. At the last count, there are 7 different adapted songs and 4 originals. I may need help...

I usd to sing chu-chi face (chitty chitty bang bang) to my old cat. I even convinced my sister I'd made up the song myself. I always remember when she finally found out I hadn't - she was nearly 30.

[quote Walkingalot]@ShinyMe - that's brilliant! Love a bit of Tom Jones.

My cat meows a lot. I meow back. This goes on for a long long time. Neighbours must think I'm nuts.

I can't sleep unless I have a bit of quilt scrunched up in front of my face and I hate my knee's touching each other so I have to tuck the quilt between my legs. My quilt looks a mess the minute I get in the bed.

Mars Bars - eat the chocolate off first, then the toffee. So am left with a disgusting looking slug. I can't eat them normally so never eat them in public.[/quote]
Me and DH also meow back. And our dd likes to think about what kind of voice she would have if she could talk (the cat not DD )

My cat leaves the room whenever I sing to her. It’s so demoralising 😭

@BlueberrySugar

Also, as 29 year old I still feel the urge to run up the stairs when I've locked the doors and turned the light out. It feels as if someone is waiting at the bottom and as soon as the lights go out they will chase me up

Same when I get up in the middle of the night for the toilet and don't turn on any lights. I wash my hands before flushing because I have to get back into bed as soon as possible after flushing.

@Frostine

If I'm home alone I will eat a packet of 10 ( ! ! ) jaffa cakes .

Lightweight.

I can eat a double pack of Jaffa cakes without pausing.

I don't. Now! 🤣

@4BlueTowers

I can't have any part of my body hang over the edge of the mattress when sleeping. I am worried someone with an axe under the bed will chop off whatever overhangs.

I am 49.

Same!!

Another one here whose dogs regularly talk - to me, to other members of the family and to eachother.

One dog is very old and the other is still a baby. As can be common in geriatric populations, the older dog is somewhat opinionated and indelicate, and delights in insulting and threatening the little one, as well as calling him demeaning nicknames. He is also extremely self-centered, believing himself to be the most impressive and distinguished creature in town; indeed, he bursts into regular song about how attractive he is, how intelligent he is, the allure of his aromatic breath ... the ability to knock a human being out at 20 paces with a single yawn marks him out in the canine world as an individual of monumental standing, apparently.

I honestly worry quite a lot sometimes that my neighbours can hear the dogs when the windows are open and I am cooking. That is when they tend to be the most vocal.

@MrsLCSofLichfield

I always say 'Hello beautiful' to crows, and 'good morning/afternoon/evening Mr Magpie to magpies, the latter I've been doing since I was a kid.

I tell the cat to behave when she goes out and not to pick fights with Teddy next door but one.

She usually ignores me.