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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Made an awful mistake due to tiredness

111 replies

Anonymous3kids · 19/09/2021 10:29

Aibu
My kids are ill atm, one has croup and the other a nasty cold (have a grown up daughter who's fine ) both kids haven't been sleeping due to illness, I only slept an hour in 2 days. I administered calpol to both of the kids b4 bed last night but forgotten I had done and told my partner to give the oldest some b4 brushing his teeth.
So my older son ended up having two doses, I rang 111 for advice and told them it was my fault, I also by mistake said that we'd miscommunicated to each other whilst on the phone, my parnter is now saying that I am trying to blame share, even though I told them it was my fault and he heard me say it . My son is fine it wasn't 2 full doses and I spoke to 3 different health care professionals they each said he was ok. Fast forward to this morning where my parnter looked upset I asked him what was wrong and he told me what i'd said was trying to blame him. I already feel like a complete failure for making such a stupid mistake without him saying that as well. Am I wrong in being angry with him for trying to make me feel worse? I've apologised to him a few times as it was a genuine mistake I wasn't trying to blame share

OP posts:
WizardOfAus · 19/09/2021 11:12

If your husband has such a problem with it, let him look after the sick kids for the next two days while you catch up on sleep.

Lachimolala · 19/09/2021 11:12

Also mmmmm in a similar vein I once left the lid off the calpol and left it in their room to which they both drank some of it. That was thanks to sleep deprivation also, these things happen so don’t beat yourself up.

Biancadelrioisback · 19/09/2021 11:13

I've literally done the same thing and DS ended up having 2 full doses and has too much in a 24 hour period. Phoned 111 who took his weight, age and amount of Calpol and apparently hed had a toxic amount and had to be seen straight away.
I sobbed the whole way to the hospital. DH was cross with me as it had been my fault and we both had work in the morning (this happened middle of the night). DS was absolutely fine after being thoroughly checked out. DH never made me feel bad about what happened afterwards and shouldered some of the blame himself voluntarily because if he'd have helped out a bit more I wouldn't have been so tired and made the mistake.

Your DH is hopefully just a bit emotional and tired and so not being his normal self and taking it to heart. He needs to snap out of it and not focus on such a small thing. Its happened. You can't change it. You've apologised. End of.

SmileyClare · 19/09/2021 11:14

@LadyLaSnack

A quick way to get the info across to the 111 operator was to blame it on a miscommunication before moving on to the overdose info.

The priority was to get the overdose info across so that they could triage, and the additional info about the miscommunication allowed them to know that nothing deliberate had occurred (and so therefore no further threat to the child). I think what you said was an efficient way of getting the important points to the operator as quickly as possible.

Exactly this. For ease you put this down to a miscommunication. There was really no need to complicate the phone call by going into details about who was at fault or why.

That doesn't mean you blame him. It was a simple way to explain this wasn't deliberate, neither of you were to blame and your parenting skills aren't in question.

He needs to get over himself and stop making you feel guilty.

EarringsandLipstick · 19/09/2021 11:15

@Regularsizedrudy

Your husband is being a dick. But also 111 for 2 doses of calpol seems extreme, I used to chug the stuff when I was little. It’s very weak.
It's not extreme.

You shouldn't have been glugging the stuff. A surprisingly small additional dose can have ramifications and needs checking. In Ireland, we often call the National Poisons helpline. You'll be advised what to watch for.

The issue is not what happens immediately but side effects later.

For adults, paracetamol overdose is also surprisingly easy - an acquaintance - a qualified pharmacist! - felt awful after her Covid vaccine & took paracetamol every 4 hours but throughout the night & was quite unwell, had to go to hospital (fine after a day).

Checking is important. It's good that all is well with DC but OP was correct to check.

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/09/2021 11:15

@Rosebel

Tell your partner he can deal with the kids for the next 2 days he can only sleep for an hour. Then see how he feels. It doesn't sound like you did anything terrible. Just ignore him until he stops being an idiot.
This. Please. Get some sleep today.
AnxiousAbi · 19/09/2021 11:16

@LadyLaSnack

A quick way to get the info across to the 111 operator was to blame it on a miscommunication before moving on to the overdose info.

The priority was to get the overdose info across so that they could triage, and the additional info about the miscommunication allowed them to know that nothing deliberate had occurred (and so therefore no further threat to the child). I think what you said was an efficient way of getting the important points to the operator as quickly as possible.

Was coming to say exactly this ^^
Ozanj · 19/09/2021 11:18

Yes you were trying to share the blame. It’s a really shitty thing to do - DH tries this too when he makes a mistake. You should take ownership of your mistakes not minimise them.

ManifestDestinee · 19/09/2021 11:19

You shouldn't have been glugging the stuff. A surprisingly small additional dose can have ramifications and needs checking. In Ireland, we often call the National Poisons helpline. You'll be advised what to watch for

National poisons would tell you that a double dose is fine and not harmful.

MasterBeth · 19/09/2021 11:19

You haven’t made an awful mistake. You gave your child a bit more Calpol than recommended.

Your husband is being a dick, but you are being melodramatic. Move on.

SunshineCake · 19/09/2021 11:19

The miscommunicating comment is probably why he thinks you are partly blaming him as it sounds like you are even if you didn't mean it.

Biancadelrioisback · 19/09/2021 11:21

@ManifestDestinee

You shouldn't have been glugging the stuff. A surprisingly small additional dose can have ramifications and needs checking. In Ireland, we often call the National Poisons helpline. You'll be advised what to watch for

National poisons would tell you that a double dose is fine and not harmful.

Well they made us take DS into hospital after a double dose to be checked out. Certainly didn't think it was fine or not harmful.
Biancadelrioisback · 19/09/2021 11:22

Hospital even gave DS a weird little teddy bear and I got a nice phone call from social services.

SunshineCake · 19/09/2021 11:23

@Baconking

So you've apologised.

What more does he want you to do? Ring 111 back and explain you said the wrong thing and DH was in no way to blame? Even though they don't care...
DH needs to move on. Leave the kids in his care for a few hours and get some sleep

Don't do this Hmm. 111 have enough to do without getting involved in snowflake men's ego.
HadEnoughofOtherThreads · 19/09/2021 11:23

You are sleep deprived, it was miscommunication on your part and you’ve apologised. The main thing is that your child is fine. It is highly unlikely to result in a Social Worker being sent to your home. Your partner needs to get over it and take over so you can catch up on sleep.

I also make notes on my phone re. last dose/next dose is due.

Youdoyoutoday · 19/09/2021 11:23

Your DP is being a dick and needs to grow a pair and, you now need to get over it, parents make mistakes, your kid is fine so stop dwelling on it. Get some sleep and a decent meal in you.

ManifestDestinee · 19/09/2021 11:24

Well they made us take DS into hospital after a double dose to be checked out. Certainly didn't think it was fine or not harmful

Well ,there was no need to. And then the hospital told you that it was fine and not harmful? Your kid was in fact fine and unharmed?

olympicsrock · 19/09/2021 11:24

It was a small mistake with no consequences ie a near miss.
The fault was yours BUT why were you so tired that this happened . He needed to help.

I crashed my car when tired - a wake up call to take better care of myself

EarringsandLipstick · 19/09/2021 11:26

@ManifestDestinee

You shouldn't have been glugging the stuff. A surprisingly small additional dose can have ramifications and needs checking. In Ireland, we often call the National Poisons helpline. You'll be advised what to watch for

National poisons would tell you that a double dose is fine and not harmful.

Funnily enough they didn't. They suggested a specific plan for monitoring days child & called me back later. All was fine. I wasn't worried at all, I actually only called as my pharmacist sister suggested I should.
Faevern · 19/09/2021 11:27

We all make mistakes.
One hour sleep in two days though when there’s two of you?

Biancadelrioisback · 19/09/2021 11:27

@ManifestDestinee

Well they made us take DS into hospital after a double dose to be checked out. Certainly didn't think it was fine or not harmful

Well ,there was no need to. And then the hospital told you that it was fine and not harmful? Your kid was in fact fine and unharmed?

They kept him in under supervision for several hours as apparently it can have delayed side effects. He was poorly at the time and they said that they couldn't definitely say if the extra dose made him ill or not as the symptoms were pretty much what he had anyways. After observation we were allowed to take him home. No long term affects.
ScribblingPixie · 19/09/2021 11:27

I'm so pleased your son is fine & it turned out not to be a big deal. Get some sleep, both of you. Don't spend time online fretting when you could be resting your eyes and brain!

EarringsandLipstick · 19/09/2021 11:28

@ManifestDestinee

Well they made us take DS into hospital after a double dose to be checked out. Certainly didn't think it was fine or not harmful

Well ,there was no need to. And then the hospital told you that it was fine and not harmful? Your kid was in fact fine and unharmed?

Er, if the helpline felt there was a need, well then there was.

The fact that all was well was a good thing but it doesn't negate the importance of checking & following up.

You sound like you've knowledge of the area so you'll be aware that damage / effects won't be immediately apparent in some situations.

Strawbsaturno · 19/09/2021 11:29

@Bluntness100

To be fair you were trying to share the blame, there was no miscommunication between you both. You’re likely both tired, let it go
FFD @Bluntness100 is there any need for this???! Try having some empathy for once 🙄
Biancadelrioisback · 19/09/2021 11:29

So no, the hospital did not say it was fine and not harmful.

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