Refused to rehome a dog ...aibu to think it's a ridiculous decision?

[brettsndsal]

We are a massive dog family.
Over the years we have had a lurcher,a border collie and a poodle all lived a happy long life.
They are part of the family and spoilt rotten.
Birthday ,Christmas presents,taken to the park daily and walks etc etc
We love them like a child basically.
Our last dog Lucy passed away aged 16 six weeks ago.
She was a rescue dog and had a bad start to life.
Anyway I've applied to rehome a dog through two rehoming places.
Both Declined us because we don't have a garden.

We have never had a Garden but that hasn't affected the dog in anyway.
We love opposite a huge park and 5 mins away from the beach.
They've refused to even do a home check because it's not suitable home for a dog.

We applied for a Jack Russell and another poodle.
Even if we had a garden I wouldn't let the dog out alone.

I'm really upset and I don't understand how a garden makes any difference.
They have lots of dogs in at the minute crying out for a new life.
We couldn't love them anymore if we tried

Aibu to think it's a bit shit?

I understand this is not always feasible for charities, but a personalised approach surely leads to better outcomes than blanket rules?

Of course. But most rescues I’ve known are struggling for time, money, resources etc. It’s not a perfect system. These places often rely heavily on donations and volunteers. Their vet bills are thousands per month. They do a really tough job and the owners and staff really do work so hard and put their everything into rehabilitating often traumatised dogs, traumatised at the hands of humans. These rules minimise the chances of these animals going through more stress and maximise the chances of them having all their needs met. I do understand people’s frustrations but I would ask them to realise why many rescues have these rules, it’s not just for the fun of it or some sort of power trip as some seem to suggest.

@LiamGallagherIsHot

For all those saying rescues are strict, if you’ve seen what they’ve seen, you’d be strict to. Some of the dogs they take in have been through dreadful things at the hands of humans, often more than once. They have a responsibility to try to make the homing a success. They don’t know you and that you if you don’t have a garden, that you will actually take the dog out a few times each day for toileting for example. People on here are quick to speak badly of them, I’d suggest walking a mile in their shoes before you do. They are doing their best.

That may be so but taking perfectly healthy dogs to be put down to the vet who's tried to adopt one is fucking insane. When dogs are crying out to be rehoused in the UK and being put to sleep but people have to get rescue dogs from abroad, doesn't something seem just a little weird? No?

This thread is an eye opener. Sheer batshittery.

That may be so but taking perfectly healthy dogs to be put down to the vet who's tried to adopt one is fucking insane.

I’ve never been involved in a rescue that’s done this. This is not commonly done.
People buying puppies and encouraging people to breed without a clue what they’re doing is only going to add to the number of dogs in rescues though.
This is a complex issue, honestly I could write pages on it, there are so many pressures and considerations. Rescues do an amazing job and people needs to back them not be slagging them off with often very little knowledge on the subject.

@Polkadotties

MyPatronusIsACat we couldn’t believe it! She has recently lost her husband to relatively early onset dementia and just wanted a little dog to keep her company. She didn't even mind if it was an older one who could last out it’s final years being a loved pampered pooch.

Awww, that's sad.

Sounds like the lady would have given a dog a fab home!

It's ridiculous, honesty. My in laws wanted to adopt a rescue dog, they'd just lost theirs at 16 years old, had rescued all their lives and had dogs in and out and they got turned down by the shelter. I know a few people with similar stories.

I know they're trying to avoid dogs ending up back in rescues but their criteria for homes seems so over the top that I don't know how they manage to find homes for them!

I had another look at some sites today as a result of this thread - can anyone explain why some dogs can only live with children over 16 - and others over 14? It’s so ridiculously specific and nonsensical. I can understand some dogs can’t live with you g children, but why 14 & 16?

@SirChenjins

I had another look at some sites today as a result of this thread - can anyone explain why some dogs can only live with children over 16 - and others over 14? It’s so ridiculously specific and nonsensical. I can understand some dogs can’t live with you g children, but why 14 & 16?

It's crazy isn't it? And I could just be making this up, but I reckon more people than not, have small-ish, or NO gardens. Very few people I know have an acre or more of land!

Also, as for the no children under 16 issue, Batshit. Like you, I can understand them not wanting a rescue dog to go to a home with children under say, 6 or 7, as they can be fractious and excitable, but none under 16. Bonkers!

I read some stories on the jokey 'pissfingers' tweet, from people who were told their rescue dog hates men, and they posted a bunch of pics of their husband/dad/grandad,, with doggo snuggled up to them, fast asleep.

Also, as a pp said, some ads say 'must be no more dogs OR cats, or fucking gerbils.' Soooooo daft!

I got refused by one of the larger cat charities as there is a pub a couple of doors down. Never did quite figure out what they were worried about - the cat going in for a swift half of a lunchtime??

@MillicentMargaretAmanda

I got refused by one of the larger cat charities as there is a pub a couple of doors down. Never did quite figure out what they were worried about - the cat going in for a swift half of a lunchtime??

Totally agree about the ages! There were loads which said the dogs couldn’t live with other dogs or cats and then conversely loads that had to go to a home where there was already a dog to “help them settle into their new home”! A good few couldn’t even live door to another dog - even though the same dog could only go to a home with a six foot fence. Oh and YY to “nervous around men” or “barks at men” - saw a few that had to go to a female only home.
I do understand there have to be restrictions but some are just ridiculously strict.

It does seem truly you bonkers that a house/flat with no garden is seen as worse than living in kennels for months or years then being put to sleep.

All this we need the best homes it’s bs they become power mad and no home is good enough yet they don’t see that their own kennel systems are worse than a home with no garden or someone who works for 6hours. Those dogs in kennels are left for more than 6hours, without actual home comforts and unlimited fuss once the owner is home, they don’t go to doggy day care or have neighbours/friends/family or dog walkers who come in multiple times a day to it’s actual home. Nope they live locked in a kennel system where they poop and wee and eat and sleep with no chance of a snuggle on a sofa, a long one hour walk maybe a cheeky bit of chicken from a Sunday roast. Just surviving not living.

Well said @Horst ^

@Horst

It does seem truly you bonkers that a house/flat with no garden is seen as worse than living in kennels for months or years then being put to sleep.

All this we need the best homes it’s bs they become power mad and no home is good enough yet they don’t see that their own kennel systems are worse than a home with no garden or someone who works for 6hours. Those dogs in kennels are left for more than 6hours, without actual home comforts and unlimited fuss once the owner is home, they don’t go to doggy day care or have neighbours/friends/family or dog walkers who come in multiple times a day to it’s actual home. Nope they live locked in a kennel system where they poop and wee and eat and sleep with no chance of a snuggle on a sofa, a long one hour walk maybe a cheeky bit of chicken from a Sunday roast. Just surviving not living.

Very well said - great points. Even when they’re in kennels they’re on display at our local Dog’s Trust and often bark incessantly as an endless stream of people are walking past their kennels and peering in at them.

When my parents retired (65 and 62) they moved to the country, had a huge garden and were turned down for a rescue dog as they were too old.

Yet the rescue wanted people at home all day I have no idea who they want to adopt dogs?

So much misinformation there Horst, not sure where to even start.

It’s not though is it. A dog in a home has much more attention and love even if left with others walking and popping in for 6hours in A week day than those living in kennels.

It’s simple a kennel system is worse for dogs than actually even a bad home where no walks are given because they at least get human interaction much much more than a kennel dog.

You can say your rescue is different blah blah blah but the fact is most rescues closes doors at a set time for all staff and don’t open up again till a set time. These dogs are on show to many randoms walking by looking for maybe a dog. They are living side by side dogs that may have issues never getting quiet from the barking. Living in a kennels full time is neglect in Its self under the false thing of being rescue and many end up put to sleep anyway.

[quote HeraInTheHereAndNow]@Technonan… I support a charity called Second Chance Golden Retriever Rescue. They have wonderful dogs (not all are retrievers). Look them up.[/quote]
Not every body is of the same opinion regarding this charity

@LiamGallagherIsHot

So much misinformation there Horst, not sure where to even start.

What has @Horst posted that is mis-information?

Their post seems pretty much bang on to me! And the vast, VAST majority of posters on this thread saying the same things (that dogs homes come out with stupid, nonsensical, pathetic reasons for people to NOT adopt a dog,) seems to back up horst's points!

So what was wrong with @horst's post? What mis-information did they post?

@LiamGallagherIsHot

For all those saying rescues are strict, if you’ve seen what they’ve seen, you’d be strict to. Some of the dogs they take in have been through dreadful things at the hands of humans, often more than once. They have a responsibility to try to make the homing a success. They don’t know you and that you if you don’t have a garden, that you will actually take the dog out a few times each day for toileting for example. People on here are quick to speak badly of them, I’d suggest walking a mile in their shoes before you do. They are doing their best.

Fair enough, but in that case they shouldn't preach so much about "adopt, don't shop", if adoption just isn't right for most potential pet owners.

We were also rejected. Our children are 15 and 11. DH and I have both previously owned dogs. Biggish back garden BACKING ONTO A PARK. DH had an agreement from work that he'd only have to go back to the office 1-2 days a week. I have a formal written agreement that I only need to go in to office one day a week (of my choosing). If the improbable happened and we both had to go in on the same day I work 10 mins from home, the youngest is home by 3.30 and we had found excellent ad hoc doggy day care.
Still not enough. One of us had to guarantee to be home full time.
We ended up buying a lovely puppy from a nice reputable breeder and it's living an amazing life. 8 months later it's not been left alone once, 2-3 walks a day, careful training, posh raw food diet and lots of love. It's such a shame a rescue couldn't have this. We'd have loved a slightly older dog. Still grumpy about it.

DH and I were refused a rescue cat because we both worked full time, then our days only overlapped 3 times a week and we said we were happy to install a cat flap. We ended up buying a kitten and don't let him out when we are not home because then how do you know how long they've been out/missing for? He's a very happy healthy twelve year old now

@KingdomScrolls

DH and I were refused a rescue cat because we both worked full time, then our days only overlapped 3 times a week and we said we were happy to install a cat flap. We ended up buying a kitten and don't let him out when we are not home because then how do you know how long they've been out/missing for? He's a very happy healthy twelve year old now

Ridiculous. I always thought my cat probably slept all day while I was at work, now I wfh I can confirm that it’s true.

My mum asked about a rescue dog who was said to be no good with other dogs.. to the point I would not be allowed to visit with my own dog (my mum has dogsat for me... the rescue said I should consider kennels instead). The dog she was asking about was in a foster home with other dogs! Made no sense to me at all... and it put my mum off trying for a rescue dog.

Some rescues are ridiculously strict... and I can understand why as they do not want any dogs they adopt out to come bouncing back to them. Good rescues keep dogs under their care for years and figure out who and what they are, and make sure they get the right home. But some of the reasons they have rejected people are daft, and I can see why some people end up getting a puppy from a breeder. My mum will probably be doing exactly that.

I applied for rescues seven times and was totally blanked despite WFH in a large house with a large secure garden, volunteered at a rescue centre as a dog walker, no kids or pets at home etc etc etc. No reasons ever given. Just was ignored whenever I applied. I bought two very smart puppies and gave them the best life - agility training, quality food, daily hour long walks as a minimum, brain games and enrichment, cuddles, never left alone or bored etc etc etc. Could have done all of that with a rescue but seemingly nobody thought I was fit to. It’s an absolute joke.

@LiamGallagherIsHot

People buying puppies and encouraging people to breed without a clue what they’re doing is only going to add to the number of dogs in rescues though.

So people - responsible experienced owners - want dogs and charities/shelters won’t let them adopt one. What’s the alternative other than buying?

I can understand the whole “they’ve had a bad experience and we want to make sure they have a good home” thing, but holding out for the perfect-on-paper home is more damaging to the animal in the long run. A good-enough home is better than a shelter, no matter how much volunteers think their love makes up for it.

And to say that people should support shelters and not “slag them off” is a damn cheek - people are trying to support shelters in their supposed-primary aim, which is to give animals a new home. But the shelters won’t let them because they enforce a tick box culture of ridiculous demands. The animals suffer in the end so yes, they bloody well deserve criticism.