Would you support an elderly parent with their health/care needs if you felt they had neglected you as a child.

[wobblywinelover]

Do we rise above it and be 'good people' and help our elderly parents who are vulnerable because they are our parents, or do we remember the shit they gave us growing up when we were vulnerable and some of the difficulties which arise in adulthood thereof (some of which have majorly impacted your life...) This is assuming you're still in contact with them and have been able to maintain a relationship with them

YABU - yes support them whatever
YANBU- no, they've made your life difficult so why should you help them now

If i was in that situation, which i am not- my parents were lovely, i would organise everything to make sure all the help they needed was provided by someone.

Was doing fine until this morning... now gone our separate ways.

It depends what the issues were. Abuse of some form, wouldn’t help them. Lesser issues I guess it depends on how serious things were and the reasoning behind their actions, the bigger picture. Post natal depression linked or if they struggled after the death of a loved one or with ill health id feel kinder about helping

I think however awful your parents were, uou have a duty to arrange care for them, not to provide ot personally though