‘Nice’ Things That Aren’t Actually

[WheelieBinPrincess]

Just a random musing.

Breakfast in bed- lovely idea, reality is you need to get up for a wee and then a tray is plonked on your lap, and groggy from sleep you are supposed to exclaim in delight over bits of pastry flaking into your sheets and slopping coffee down yourself and trying to subtly get the sluggy bits of fat off the bacon because you usually just get medallions.

Relaxing massage- I went the other day and I kept thinking ‘I’ll switch off and enjoy it in a minute’ but just kept thinking about whether to get the tube or the bus home and if there are oven chips in the freezer or not or if I watered my peace lily last week and if not it’s probably died. Then it was finished and it cost me £80.

Anyone got anything they can add to things that sound so nice as an idea but in reality are just not really?

M & S sandwiches and similar food. Asda's are better. I try every now and then to 'treat myself', as people go on about it, but it always disappoints.

Any meal that has complicated ingredients and/or takes over 45 mins to prepare. By the time it’s ready I’m completely bored of it and couldn’t care less what it tastes like.

Barbecues - similar to the above. Lots faff for a distinctly average end product. And always end up being served at a ridiculous time, eg too late for lunch, too early for dinner.

Camping - just why??? There’s a reason humans have invented buildings, beds, plumbing etc.

I do love baths though

Haircuts. I hate staring at myself and am rubbish at small talk so usually end up in uncomfortable silence. Also I worry I have nits as I work in a school. Never know whether to leave a tip. Argh.

Takeaway.
It's never ever ever worth what I pay for it and the amount of waste is consistently ridiculous.

HelloFresh and other recipe boxes. All that faff. All that packaging. Too much chopping and slicing and dicing.

@Speakeasy22

Pimms - just sickly sweet. You feel you have to have one at Wimbledon, it costs about £12 and is anything but refreshing.

Worth making Pimms with bitter lemon rather than lemonade, less sweet. Though I wouldn’t pay £12 for a glass of it whatever it’s mixed with!

Never had breakfast in bed. I would hate it.

Aperol. It tastes like cheap cough medicine.

I really don't like any sort of big or public surprise, like a surprise party, or a surprise holiday. I like looking forward to things!

Even attending a surprise party can be an exercise in cringe - I went to a surprise 50th where the woman thought she was just going out for a meal with her DH, but was instead whisked up to the function room full of family and friends. She refused to let the photographer take a single photo with her in because everyone else was dressed up to the nines while she was in jeans and a jumper. She also couldn't read any of the cards or work out who the gifts were from because she hadn't brought her glasses. As you can imagine, it all felt a bit flat...

I totally hate going to the hairdressers. It's boring - takes too long and I always feel really dirty after going. I just want to get home.

Christmas
Birthdays
Presents
Surprises

Bbq's. Burnt meat, dry fish and chicken either raw or overcooked. The best bits are the salads and they're not even 100% reliable. Also that plastic cheese people put on the burnt burgers. Beleugh.

Cream Cakes
Cakes
Chocolate Cakes

Agree with much of this except Spwrol Spritz. I was hooked on these when we visited Vienna? Sorry..🙄) and everyone seemed to be drinking them in outside cafes at 11 am. Decided to try one and it was AMAZING! Cue me having one every morning for 4 days. Tried one on England. It was completely nasty....

Parks - other mums seem to loved taking their kids to parks, I used to find it boring (pre- internet says, maybe now I could have occupied myself on Mumsnet!).

Steaks

Bats. Sorry. Aperol Spritz.

camping
baths
going to the beach - only time I've enjoyed it was pre-kids, with a sun lounger, big umbrella, beer, crisps and a good book
gardening
cooking/crafting/science experiments with small kids
clubbing
going to the theatre

LOVE a vodka martini though, yoga, and a deep-tissue massage (not in that rder). Spa breaks are OK cos mostly I just read in my room or have a swim. Can't stand saunas, steam room etc.

new years eve
parties at mine
cooking things that make a mess
winter walks freezing
house guests
fleecy bedding cooking hot
french stick bread crumbs everywhere
red coloured drink of any kind the stress of it spilling !!!
long car journeys down country roads boats planes travel sick on all!!
films late at night just fall asleep
anywhere that involves walking through mud!!

hairdressers
surprises
camping
horse riding am allergic to them

Love a martini, drinking it in the bath is even better!

Agree 100% Xmas dinner. All that work for (usually someone’s) drunken huff and not what I’d ever choose to eat.

Massages !

Hot tubs. Just no.

Picnics
Camping with kids
Anything 'girlie' - spas, beauty treatments, makeup, fashion
Cut flowers (pot plants are lovely)
Posh wine
Family photography sessions
Electric blanket

@Mother87

69 or anything 'adventurous'

Couldn't agree more about 69. Can't concentrate, can't enjoy and have to endure knowing that both of you are eyeballing each other's arsehole.

Christmas, just stress stress stress!

@GiantHaystacks2021

Picnics Drinking before 7pm Truffles

Drinking AFTER 7pm for me 🤣