Hate the school run

[CandyFIosss]

Does anyone else hate the school run? I honestly dread it, I hate it and if I never had to do it again I would be happy, it seem unusual though and most parents seem to love it! Does anyone else hate it?

I hate it so much, last year I got so anxious over it I was ready to throw myself in front of a bus, honestly it’s awful. I don’t understand why I hate it so much nothing has everything happened.

Dragging our arses up in the morning, loading the wheelchair (dismantling it first), the walking frame and DD in to the car, driving for ten minutes and trying to get one of the few disabled spaces (used by people who don’t have a badge because it is a little bit wet and their precious child can’t be rained on) unloading it all, having to put the wheelchair back together, and having to wait around for a support assistant to collect her from reception. Then doing the same at the end of the day, having to be there half an hour early because the parking is horrific as we have no option to park further away. Fair to say I don’t miss it.

I didn’t like it either OP!

Once they were able to hop out of the car it was a breeze. It was great that my eldest was able to bring his brother into his class🙏.
Also great when my girls were able to be dropped and run in together too.

Taking 4 children to school by bus sounds absolutely hell like.

I actually can't imagine it.

You have my 100% sympathy.

@Popcornbetty I've felt a bit crap about all of my work related choices since having DC. I used to to have a well paid job, but post DC, I continued to work FT for a bit, then became a SAHM for a few years, now working in a low paid job, low status job, earning half the wage of most of my friends.

I have to give myself a shake and remember that most people don't really care what choices other people make.

Sorry about the derail. At least cliquey, judgey school mums were never a problem!

I think people overthink the school gate thing. I guess when I'm chatting briefly it would look like I am "in the club" to someone who isn't/doesn't chat, but I'm really not. I don't socialise or do coffee with them. But if you see a group standing having a chat you might assume they're all the best of mates and are a clique but sometimes, they are just passing the time and would be welcoming to another mum joining in.

I have become fairly immune to it. Best thing I did was to get a dog - they are not allowed on the school site, so we have a lovely, chatty walk to school, then I shove DD in through the gate and waltz off over the fields, and at pick up I loiter around the village until DD comes out, instead of standing in the school yard with the mummy-cliques.

It's stressful, noisy and has to be done up to 10 times a week (twice a day) on time, including all the getting ready before and lunch prep, uniform prep etc. YANBU.

I really don't think there are many people who loves school run, tbh.

@Popcornbetty

'I saw some of the mums in their smart work gear and felt a bit inferior, they probably saw my more relaxed life and thought 'lucky cow'.'

@MsVestibule i feel that way too and I'm struggling to deal with the embarrassment i feel when working Mums ask if i work and have to say 'no i'm a sahm' and find myself rambling 'but I'm looking for work once youngest in school' to somehow justify it. I feel like they will think it is lazy! It is ao stupid i know but i hate telling people and would feel better to say i worked even part time!

Totally relate to this @Popcornbetty! Even worse now because I had a business I just started before covid and I would chat on occasion about that. The business failed during the second lockdown and I’m back at home. Totally awkward whenever anyone asks how it’s going. Or if I’ve already mentioned it, the topic gets avoided like the elephant in the room.

I’ve always hated it too.

DD is now at secondary & I just drop her & drive off. No other parents around. Same at pick up time. I used to absolutely dread the primary school run though. It really affected me & I used to fret all afternoon leading up to pick up time. In the end, I went as late as possible to avoid hanging around in the noisy crowd ( it was a big school so there were lots of parents waiting).

That does sound crap and stressful OP. The chivvying of reluctant kids into shoes and coat etc is really annoying I agree but I quite like the walk to school after we actually get out of the damn house! The bus sounds grim though.
Btw i wouldn't worry in the slightest about being 'in' or otherwise, most parents are just there to drop and run, I'm sure they aren't judging anyone else! How could they have time?
I can honestly tell you I have no idea what the other parents are wearing or if they look smug or not. Maybe they think I look smug? Ah well!

It's not too bad. I try to get to school just as they're going in so no waiting around, at pick up I just read on my phone. I don't dislike (most of) the other parents but I'm quite introverted.

I remember being at primary school and often walking with a group of 4-5 other kids the same age at least from like 7/8 years old onwards, if not earlier?

I’m not that old, only late 30s! So this would have been early 90s.

Was that unusual? Does no one do this anymore?!

I have to get to school 30 mins early just to get a parking space
. Total ball ache.

I hate it OP
It takes me almost an hour to drop all three of mine, the traffic is a nightmare, parking is dangerous. I'm not fussed about other parents or socializing, I just wish it was a nice walk, with bikes and scooters instead of a nightmare driving commute.

No they don’t @JustBrowwsing, which tbh is no bad thing.

It’s fair to say we’re more protective of our kids now. That comes at a cost, I get that, but the horrible newspaper stories aren’t quite as regular now as they were once.

We use to walk to school as well (I’m early 30s) but now my kids school doesn’t allow them to walk until year 6. And a year 6 can’t take younger children. But yes we use to walk from young without our mum when I was in school.

'remember being at primary school and often walking with a group of 4-5 other kids the same age at least from like 7/8 years old onwards, if not earlier i’m not that old, only late 30s! So this would have been early 90s.
Was that unusual? Does no one do this anymore?!'

Aren't we just more aware of danger now? It has always been there and i remember hearing back in the day about bad men and not to get in cars or go near strangers offering sweets etc. It just somehow seemed a more innocent time and not as prevalent as it is now. I don't think the internet etc helps matters. I must have walked on my own or with friends from really young but wouldn't allow my own children to do so that young. It probably doesn't help we have a super busy road on the route so i guess where you live is obviously a major factor too. I also think it depends on the child in question too.

When I was off work having treatment or if my ds went back a day before me etc I loved being able to drop him off at nursery /school and collect him again. We used to have great chats and ds loved being dropped off /picked up by me. Occasionally, we would leave a bit early and stop for breakfast. We lived about a 15 minute walk away and unless dh was able to take him, we walked. Ds is in Yr11 now and we live about 7 minutes walk away from school. Tbf, I get what some pp's are saying about the playground. Some of the dm's were desperately trying to prove themselves at that stage in their cliques with some of them trying to force friendships between their dc's. I stayed out of it, said hi to the odd person, had an occasional chat with someone but I wasn't worried. I was there for my son.

I only have 1 to take to school who has plenty of energy and isn't a moaner. His older brother attends a special school so gets the bus. The school run is my time with the little one who generally gets a bum deal out of life. He scoots, I run/walk, takes 25 minutes. Then I go for run after and head home 2 days a week (I work PT).

I might look like one of those smug mums but you really don't see what it's like at home getting through the weekend and summer holidays with a child with ASD who thrives on routine.

It isn’t just being aware of danger (imo.)

I think groups of young children aren’t always sensible or kind together to one another. A pack of seven year old children walking to school together without an adult isn’t something I’d be happy about.

Then roads and so on.

My son gets distracted from getting ready (or pretty much anything) every other second so it’s tricky keeping him “on it”.

I just talk to those I know at school, but would talk to other parents who approached me. I’m not in a clique or anything!

I hated it too. Thankfully my final one is starting comp this week.

I'd make sure I was getting there at the perfect time where they were starting to go in, just to try and avoid any communication lol. I am socially awkward too with social anxiety and I never ever got used to the yard.

What I hated the most was the slow walkers. The groups of parents with the prams who take up the whole path. Especially when it's soaking and saying excuse me takes them 5 minutes to sort out an opening for us to get through, so it was easier to skip through the soggy mud. If I was getting there just on time, then they were most definitely going to be late. Why so god damn slow then?! I will not miss that and the path rage it gave me.