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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hate the school run

217 replies

CandyFIosss · 06/09/2021 00:05

Does anyone else hate the school run? I honestly dread it, I hate it and if I never had to do it again I would be happy, it seem unusual though and most parents seem to love it! Does anyone else hate it?

OP posts:
PhoboPhobia · 06/09/2021 07:49

It sounds pretty hard for you @CandyFIosss. I’m not surprised you don’t like it.

Mine are grown up now but I also hated it. I had to get them to school and had a short window to then get to work and it was always stressful. I cried with relief when DH changed his job and was able to take over the morning run for the last 2-3 years before youngest started high school.

Puffinhead · 06/09/2021 07:49

I’m in my 12th year and can’t wait for it to be over. I don’t hate, hate it but it’s a chore. Although DD now wants me to leave her further away from the school building as she’s gaining more confidence, result!

Thankfully I drive and drop a few mornings a week and my teen DC do some after school pick ups on their way home from school which really helps (they literally have to walk past the primary school so not going out of their way).

I loved it last year with the staggered entry/leaving times but now they’re all in together it’s too busy for my liking!

LittleBiscuit09 · 06/09/2021 07:50

My DS has done breakfast and after school club for the last four years so I've avoid smug mum club.

My friend hates it though!

lannistunut · 06/09/2021 07:50

I didn't like the bit in the playground, but the walk to and from school was lovely, we had a half hour walk and it gave time to chat.

I just kept my head down in the playground, although tricky as there were quite a few people from work who had kids at the same school.

Katyy · 06/09/2021 07:51

We lived so near to school they walked there with their friends from aged 7. Job done. I agree though I hated those 3 infant years.

NotSorry · 06/09/2021 07:51

Just finished 20 years of school runs - youngest off to uni in 2 weeks

I feel your pain OP

RubertRoo · 06/09/2021 07:54

Ours still has queueing for the whole school at one gate and a one way system to walk around the school (which they adapted for Covid and kept) so I havent encountered any cliques yet because there is nowhere to stop and chat to parents unless you are next to them in the queue.
Although I do live a 5 min walk away from the school so at least I don't have to worry about transport to get there.
The cars that park outside my house always look frantically hunting for spaces so I guess I'm lucky living so close. I start walking with DD at 8.25 and I'm back home for 8.35ish

muddyford · 06/09/2021 07:54

We had neighbours who packed the children in the car and drove across the road to the school, then drove back. Total of perhaps 30 yards.

Lachimolala · 06/09/2021 07:55

I hate it, literally can’t stand it. Can’t wait until next year when he goes to secondary and my youngest will go to the before/after school club and they walk them there.

Interestingly I didn’t mind it as much when my ex used to drive us on his way to work so I didn’t have to faff with 3 kids on the bus and a long walk. So I’m thinking it’s the messing around with buses and walking in all weathers with small children that really coloured my opinion on it.

My driving test is soon and I’m praying I pass, I’m sure I’ll hate it less when I do and I’m finally on the road.

Rangoon · 06/09/2021 07:55

It was a 9 year old on a bus and the bus ended up at the school and we had rehearsed the trip with him before. He was very confident. It was his first day at that school but not his first day at school. Hardly surprising he later travelled round Asia as a teenager with a mate starting out in China and ending up skiing in South Korea.

Our children don't go to school till five though so they are a little bit older. I never let the five year olds cross the city by bus or train! I suspect our primary schools are smaller too so as soon as the child is in the yard, their classroom is likely in front of them. We don't do handing over to the teacher. If they are not there for roll call and there is no telephone call from the parent explaining they are sick etc, then the parents are contacted immediately.

Em8725 · 06/09/2021 07:55

I don’t mind doing it unless it’s raining because we have no choice but to walk.

I don’t like the getting up early, and the constant “get dressed, come on brush your teeth” before we go is awful!

Wheresmybiscuit3 · 06/09/2021 07:57

It’s the stress I dislike.

Get them up but they don’t want to get up.
Get them dressed but they don’t want to get dressed.
What do they want to eat? They don’t want to eat as it’s too early.
What do they want in their packed lunch? Something we don’t have probably.
Get to the school but can’t park.
Walk to classroom one and the teacher wants to say hello to each child which is really, really lovely…
Then sprint to the second classroom before the second one is late.
It’s a one way system.
Get back to car and it’s bedlam trying to leave.

Husband has work. I have work. I wish we lived round the corner.

mogsrus · 06/09/2021 08:00

never been driven to school always walked

EllieSattler · 06/09/2021 08:04

Someone should copy the link to this thread and post it any time a thread comes up about whether to choose a closer or slightly better primary school. Having your primary school within a short walk is brilliant.

What counts as a smug mum? I chat to parents I'm friendly with on the school run but I suspect I'm too scruffy to be considered smug Grin

cafenoirbiscuit · 06/09/2021 08:05

I feel your pain. I never found my tribe at the school gates, and it was a lonely place to be. I’m much happier all round now I don’t have to do it any more.

Restinblue · 06/09/2021 08:07

I never minded it but I literally lived opposite the school! We crossed the road, the children queued up in the playground and the teacher came out to collect them. There wasn’t a lot to do.

If I had four children and had to get the bus, then no, I would hate that.

CyclingIsNotOuting · 06/09/2021 08:10

Yeah I hate it too.
An awkward ’hello’ to the people I know. Sometimes they say hello back, sometimes they don’t. A weird smile at the people I recognise but never spoken to. And then the wait in the queue to get my kid in, while they pull on my arm or whinge to run around with the other kids (they’re not supposed to), followed by a nonchalant ’bye’ from my child - if I’m lucky.
All the while being completely ignored by the teacher/TA/adult stood on the door.
Sigh.
Don’t get me started on the walk there…!

PumpkinPatch21 · 06/09/2021 08:11

I hate it, especially the trashy gossip school mums who turn up in their PJs!
Dh does it for me. Grin

TangoWhiskyAlphaTango · 06/09/2021 08:11

@Halfaham

Yes. It feels fantastic when they go to secondary.
This!!
listsandbudgets · 06/09/2021 08:13

Hardly see anyone as we drop DS off at 7.30 and since we're out DD is in at 7.40 unless she wants to take the bus (year 11). Traffic is nice and light at that time.

Don't mind the school run itself but getting them out the door is quite another story

Original poster
CandyFIosss · 06/09/2021 08:14

I didn’t choose the school, we had newly moved to the area and I didn’t have much choice, I applied to 5 schools but none of them had any space so had to settle on this one.

OP posts:
Ori3 · 06/09/2021 08:16

See I don’t get the whole playground mentality, people worrying about not being part of a cliquey group & dreading the school run. It’s all very childish. Who cares? Why do you care? Take the kids in, say hi to people if you like them, ignore them if you don’t get on or haven’t got a connection, go home/go to work, get on with your day.

Why do so many mums feel the pressure to be part of a group in the playground? It’s almost like the expectations of the kids get transposed onto the adults. There’s more important things in life surely?

Wizzbangfizz · 06/09/2021 08:16

I've always hated it! What is there to enjoy?!

Monestera · 06/09/2021 08:16

It’s not just about chatting though, I’m not a morning person so hate having to get up early and rush out the door, I hate having to get the children all dressed in the morning, I hate the walk down as we live quite far but sometimes get the bus but it’s always packed, I basically hate every part of it, I don’t chat to the other parents anyway as I’m socially awkward but that’s not the only part I hate

I am going to write what I normally roll my eyes at reading - "And you chose to have four children?".

Yellowcrockpot · 06/09/2021 08:19

Dreading it.
DS is at his dads this morning so thankfully that's covered.

However later, I have to go get him - I have an irrational fear that I'll go to the wrong classroom, I'm always worried I've got the time wrong, read the clock wrong, I'm too late/too early, my exs wife and he kids (Ds half and step siblings) all go to the same school so I have to contend with her/them (and we don't get along)

Exs wife is at the school daily and interferes with my DS teachers and class etc.
I know several people and hate having to be polite and say hello.
Just thinking about this week is giving me migrane...

They've stopped the staggered start times which were bliss... meaning a 30 minute time slot to get you child into school. Very little school traffic/pedestrian traffic, less social interaction, being able to talk to DS teacher if required without another 50 parents listening in - I don't know why they've changed it...

But kept the fact the school closes at 1:30pm on a Friday Angry making Fridays bloody pointless IMO, especially shit for working parents!!