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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to be really cross about this breakfast club situation?

229 replies

Henni19 · 04/09/2021 21:29

My 3yo started at the school nursery on Thursday, his 5yo brother went into y1.
On Friday I put them into breakfast club as I had work.
School are still operating bubbles and all other restrictions (i am annoyed about this, although from a thread I posted the other day many disagreed with me).
Anyway it turns out my 3yo is the only child in the nursery bubble in breakfast club so they made him sit at a table on his own for the whole hour, while his brother sat the other side of the hall with his friends.
My eldest saw him crying asking for me and asked if he could sit with him but was told he wasn't allowed.
Only 2 staff work there and they both greeted us so no confusion over them being brothers, sounds like just taking the bubble rule to the extreme.
I cant work out if I am more devastated or bloody fuming about it.
Aibu to send an email to school asking them to use some common sense?
2 days in and 3yo already doesn't want to go back ☹

OP posts:
Theworldishard · 04/09/2021 21:58

@Kolo

Why? I don't set the rules

You don't seem to understand them either.

I've seen it happen, I've seen people working with children become hateful and compassion less. Time to move on.

You've made assumptions here.
Theworldishard · 04/09/2021 21:59

Don't take it out on me that schools aren't run as you would like. I do my best, I work so hard with the children. But it is my job at the end of the day and if my headteacher says they can't cross bubbles, I have to adhere to that.

MyCousinDaphne · 04/09/2021 22:01

I work with 11 to 16 year olds and I wouldn't let this happen to one of my kids, let alone a three year old. We have lost all sight of what is OK and what isn't.

itsgettingwierd · 04/09/2021 22:03

I'd ask them outright if they honestly believe brothers who live together need to be kept separate in a room?

I find asking people to have to explain heir daft decisions really makes it awkward for them!

GreenTortoise · 04/09/2021 22:04

This makes me sad. I'd actually cry thinking of my DS just sitting there all by himself. Bloody ridiculous!

MayorGoodwaysChicken · 04/09/2021 22:04

@Theworldishard

Actually we are highly rated. Schools are not as they appear on the surface sometimes. Sorry to burst that bubble.
It can be ‘highly rated’ and still awful. I agree it sounds it and sorry but you sound cold and heartless.
GreenTortoise · 04/09/2021 22:05

@Theworldishard

Also lots of kids cry for their mum, it's not child abuse.
Actively leaving the child sat by his bloody self whilst his brother is watching him cry. The poor child is 3. The brother will also be upset watching this. No way would I want you looking after my child. Think you're in the wrong profession. You literally sound so heartless.
CrossUniStudent · 04/09/2021 22:05

How pedantic. How is it any more risk to have the older brother with him at breakfast club?

StatisticallyChallenged · 04/09/2021 22:06

We run after school clubs - no longer required to bubble but when we did the bubbles were of a decent size and this would never have happened. Apart from anything our staff had to stay with their bubble and not mix so we couldn't have had a bubble of 1 unless they had a dedicated staff member.

Under no circumstances would we have run with one child in a bubble on their own. Covid was important but we were also still expected to meet the children's other needs and that would not have been acceptable. Not letting his brother sit with him just shows a complete lack of logic/reasoning too.

Evilcountspatula · 04/09/2021 22:06

Unbelievable and ridiculous. Your poor LO.

Notashandyta · 04/09/2021 22:06

That's despicable

NannyAndJohn · 04/09/2021 22:07

You have to realise that if they break the rules and one of the children ends up getting Covid, the staff member responsible will likely end up in a lot of trouble.

There are no winners here, unfortunately.

Kolo · 04/09/2021 22:08

@Theworldishard

Don't take it out on me that schools aren't run as you would like. I do my best, I work so hard with the children. But it is my job at the end of the day and if my headteacher says they can't cross bubbles, I have to adhere to that.
I feel pretty sad for you, that's all. Don't know if you're a wind up, probably are, but I made a promise to myself years ago that if I ever talked about children the way I heard a couple of school staff talking, and like the way you are on this post, I'd do myself and all the kids in the school a massive favour by getting out and getting a job doing something else.
DappledThings · 04/09/2021 22:08

That's horrendous. Our school didn't have bubbles in ASC at all thank goodness which was a perfectly sensible decision. I'd be gutted thinking about my 3 year old not able to take comfort from her big brother and not able to understand why.

Soontobe60 · 04/09/2021 22:08

[quote Theworldishard]@MayorGoodwaysChicken no but it's a rule we have to stick to.

If you think that's the worst thing that happens to a child at school, think again. Lunchtimes are the worst. Children lost in a crowd and only two staff watching about 100, children[/quote]
No it isn’t, and no you don’t. Also, there are more than 2 staff watching 100 children at lunch time, what planet. Are you on?!!

StarshipsAreMeantToFly · 04/09/2021 22:09

@NannyAndJohn

You have to realise that if they break the rules and one of the children ends up getting Covid, the staff member responsible will likely end up in a lot of trouble.

There are no winners here, unfortunately.

I agree, it's not the staff members fault, it will be whoever gave them the rule in the first place. I'd write to the head and explain the situation, they might let the eldest go and sit with the youngest.
FatLarrysBand · 04/09/2021 22:10

When bubbles were still in place, we capped WAC numbers at 15 but told the parents that, in that particular setting, there'd be children mixing from Yr R to Yr 6. Not one complaint or withdrawal.

StarshipsAreMeantToFly · 04/09/2021 22:10

No it isn’t, and no you don’t. how do you know what rules someone else has been told to follow?

SisterGabriel · 04/09/2021 22:10

I work in a secondary school and we wouldn’t be this cruel to a child. “I was just following the rulz” is not a good enough excuse.

RussianSpy101 · 04/09/2021 22:11

Unfortunately, a lot of people lack common sense.
Very sad to think a person working with young children would find this in anyway acceptable.
Bubbles are one thing, but they live in the same house for Christ sake.

Happyface120 · 04/09/2021 22:11

Oh gosh, threads like this make me so thankful for my DCs wonderful teachers and TAs. @Theworldishard wouldn't last a week there...

Freddiefox · 04/09/2021 22:13

@Theworldishard

I used to work in bf club and I do an after school club and unfortunately we also would have done the same
I bet you wouldn’t on an ofsted day, or a head walkabout.
Kolo · 04/09/2021 22:13

@StarshipsAreMeantToFly

No it isn’t, and no you don’t. how do you know what rules someone else has been told to follow?
I've read the guidance to schools. Lots of times. All of the updates (I think, there's been a lot). I've implemented them, I've written policy on them, as well as risk assessments and responses to systems of controls for covid. I know that it's not in any guidance that you should keep a bubble of 1 child. In fact, I've also read the eyfs guidance, and it says you should not expect them to socially distance.
godmum56 · 04/09/2021 22:15

bubbles or not that's awful as has been said there could have been solutions other than leaving a three year old child to cry.

JustLyra · 04/09/2021 22:16

I don't know any school that would have done that and I've worked in a lot.

At worst the sibling should have been moved so they could sit in a household bubble of two.

All of the guidance covered scenarios that would have allowed for that as well. Not to mention bubbles are no longer required anyway.

Any school or childcare setting that stuck to a one child bubble, especially for a very young child, has no business looking after children as they're obviously clueless.

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