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AIBU?

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Original poster

Was I in the wrong? Feel stupid now.

198 replies

MiaAnnabell3 · 04/09/2021 15:29

In town today, very busy shopping centre.

Whilst paying for parking a little boy came running past me - very distressed, you know that "blind panic" when they've lost their parents. Shouting mummy repeatedly.

As he was heading through the doors to the multi story car park I left my own kids with my husband and was thankfully able to get myself in front of him before he made it out - I never touched him, just blocked his way.

I asked him if he knew where to find mummy but he was so distressed it was hard to understand, was just shouting for his Mum.

A couple came through the doors and I said "Is this boy with you?"

To which two women appeared and said "No he's with us. We were watching him from over there. He was having a tantrum and you gave him the attention he wanted. You want to keep your nose out!" Then sort of snatched him up and walked off. One of them also shouted "Karen!" over her shoulder.

Feel really stupid now. Sad

OP posts:
caspersmagicaljourney · 05/09/2021 19:43

YANBU you did what I and any other sensible person would have done.
Please don't beat yourself up over this. Those stupid women aren't worth it. 🌷

Winterflower84 · 05/09/2021 19:46

Two idiots! Keep doing kindness OP, it will be appreciated by the right people.

daisydaisy11 · 05/09/2021 19:47

You did the right thing OP, I would have been grateful to you for looking out for my child. Please don't change your behaviour because of the pond scrum you encountered.

Nocutenamesleft · 05/09/2021 19:48

You 100% did the right thing

They’re just annoyed because someone basically called them out for leaving their kid!

Good on you!

SolitaryTree · 05/09/2021 19:51

You didn’t do anything wrong at all, they sound like a pair of idiots!

notoldjustpastyoung · 05/09/2021 19:52

Good grief - why are you feeling like that. If he had got through the doors he could have been in all sorts of danger, getting run over, taken by someone, dread to think. I'd have told the 'two women' that children have tantrums but should not be left to their own devices. They should be thankful. You mention not touching him. Are we getting so scared that we are afraid to help a little child. Well done anyway, it doesn't sound like they were near enough to stop him.

notoldjustpastyoung · 05/09/2021 19:53

Sorry want to add, would you have felt stupid if something had happened and you hadn't done anything.

thinkingaboutLangCleg · 05/09/2021 20:01

You were right to try to help a frightened child. Poor little fellow, living with idiots like that.

Barmychick · 05/09/2021 20:05

You were kind concerned human being.Dont doubt your self!😚

Justgivemewine · 05/09/2021 20:05

@Nocutenamesleft

You 100% did the right thing

They’re just annoyed because someone basically called them out for leaving their kid!

Good on you!

This ^^

Annoyed and probably extremely embarrased as well, so lashed out at you to hide it.

Leaving a child to tantrum is one thing, letting it escape into a car park is (fucking stupid) another.

Next time do exactly what you did this time but just be ready to give them a full barrel load back if they start on you, something along the lines of “Ok next time I’ll let him run into the car park and get run over, you (insert expletives of your choice)

winnieanddaisy · 05/09/2021 20:08

Maybe the women had never heard of James Bulger going missing from a shopping centre when his poor mum had took her eye of him literally for a couple of seconds . They don't deserve children .

3peassuit · 05/09/2021 20:11

I would have done exactly the same as you OP and I think most people on Mumsnet would have too.

FreyaW · 05/09/2021 20:21

Nope. You were far from being unreasonable...you were being a responsible adult.
Give yourself a pat on the back/celebratory glass of wine and vow to do it again should the same situation present itself.
It's the child you gave a toss about..nd could may well have prevent a horrendous accident.
It's never NEVER good for a child to think they have been abandoned.
Sad bitches.

SingleMamaGY · 05/09/2021 20:21

It’s just makes me feel sad for the poor little boy. Everyone loses their patience and toddlers are annoying but still I feel so sorry for him to be that upset

Mamaof2males · 05/09/2021 20:25

I’d be so grateful for your intervention I’m sure most would agree. Those pair of fools should know better than behave like that and should’ve come over immediately to explain. Ignore their pathetic behaviour!

Whynottry123 · 05/09/2021 20:29

You did nothing wrong, what you did was absolutely the right thing to do. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad.

KingsOfTheWildFrontier · 05/09/2021 20:31

What horrible idiots they are, poor child. Well done on trying to help OP.

greendiva · 05/09/2021 20:34

Very similar happened to me recently, mum was leaving a child to tantrum, he was getting closer and closer to a track that had ponies passing by. He crawled underneath just as I tried to grab him. Mum came rushing over and yanked him up by one arm over a high fence and stormed off. Shite parenting. You did the right thing.

JonSnowIsALoser · 05/09/2021 20:35

If only there were people like you around when little Jamie Bulger was crying.

Not ignoring a crying child in distress is never unreasonable. Flowers

Yogalola · 05/09/2021 20:37

I think anyone seeing a distressed child would be worried and do the same. They shouldn’t of let the kid run wild like that

Dontknowanymore2 · 05/09/2021 20:47

Absolute imbeciles, they should not be allowed to look after a small child. What idiot thinks you gave him the attention he was after when he was so distressed and in danger. Glad i didnt see it.

SneakyCucumberAction · 05/09/2021 20:53

@MiaAnnabell3

In town today, very busy shopping centre.

Whilst paying for parking a little boy came running past me - very distressed, you know that "blind panic" when they've lost their parents. Shouting mummy repeatedly.

As he was heading through the doors to the multi story car park I left my own kids with my husband and was thankfully able to get myself in front of him before he made it out - I never touched him, just blocked his way.

I asked him if he knew where to find mummy but he was so distressed it was hard to understand, was just shouting for his Mum.

A couple came through the doors and I said "Is this boy with you?"

To which two women appeared and said "No he's with us. We were watching him from over there. He was having a tantrum and you gave him the attention he wanted. You want to keep your nose out!" Then sort of snatched him up and walked off. One of them also shouted "Karen!" over her shoulder.

Feel really stupid now. Sad

No you did well. Don't let some trailer trash tell you otherwise.
Mumwithbaggage · 05/09/2021 21:01

I saw a dad panic today in Tesco because his child went missing for less than a minute - his face was utter fear. You absolutely did the right thing. They are stupid.

Bimblybomeyelash · 05/09/2021 21:03

I once approached a crying child that looked lost. Parents nowhere to be seen. Turned out they had done that ‘we’re walking off without you then’ thing, and they ran back to their child and apologised to me and explained that she was being stubborn and wouldn’t budge. I said ‘not to worry, we’ve all
been there’. A normal way for adults to interact in that situation.

Owl55 · 05/09/2021 21:48

After the death of James Bulger I swore if I ever saw a child alone and distressed I would intervene whether right or wrong .You did the right thing , if someone had intervened with James he may still be alive today . That boys parents are wrong not you !