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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was I in the wrong? Feel stupid now.

198 replies

MiaAnnabell3 · 04/09/2021 15:29

In town today, very busy shopping centre.

Whilst paying for parking a little boy came running past me - very distressed, you know that "blind panic" when they've lost their parents. Shouting mummy repeatedly.

As he was heading through the doors to the multi story car park I left my own kids with my husband and was thankfully able to get myself in front of him before he made it out - I never touched him, just blocked his way.

I asked him if he knew where to find mummy but he was so distressed it was hard to understand, was just shouting for his Mum.

A couple came through the doors and I said "Is this boy with you?"

To which two women appeared and said "No he's with us. We were watching him from over there. He was having a tantrum and you gave him the attention he wanted. You want to keep your nose out!" Then sort of snatched him up and walked off. One of them also shouted "Karen!" over her shoulder.

Feel really stupid now. Sad

OP posts:
Feelingmardy · 04/09/2021 16:30

They were unfit parents and also bullies. You did nothing wrong.

Foxmylife · 04/09/2021 16:31

Idiots! You did the right thing!

2et2font5 · 04/09/2021 16:31

You should not feel stupid and their reaction says everything about them and is no reflection on you.

grapewine · 04/09/2021 16:34

We were watching him from over there. He was having a tantrum and you gave him the attention he wanted. You want to keep your nose out!"

Well, they were being twats, weren't they, letting a little boy run out into a car park. Moronic.

YANBU at all.

Winter2020 · 04/09/2021 16:34

Don't change OP,
If you decide not to get involved next time so you don't get burned again it could be that time that a child is lost/snatched or hit by a car.
Don't give those women another thought.

grapewine · 04/09/2021 16:35

@5zeds

You did the right thing. Do it again if it ever happens. People like you save children’s lives.
This.
diddl · 04/09/2021 16:36

That's hard to make sense of.

It actually sounds as if they had walked away out of sight & he was panicking & trying to find them.

I think just about anyone would have done the same as you Op.

Don't feel stupid.

If you had let him run ut they would have asked why didn't you stop him!

tickledtiger · 04/09/2021 16:36

Sounds like they were the ones having the temper tantrum not the boy at that point.

You did the right thing and you should do it again if the same situation arises.

AmelieLovesAutumn · 04/09/2021 16:38

@MiaAnnabell3

You did exactly the right thing!

Maybe he was having a tantrum fir the 40th time today, but when they get to the terrified 'mummmmmyyyy' stage you hug them, you don't let them run off in a fucking car park

I hope they lose sleep tonight over what could have happened, brainless twats!

Imagine how much worse you'd be feeling if he'd been hit by a car, fallen down the stairs or whatever! Don't let them put you off doing the same thing another time should the need arise.

Itllbeaninterestingchristmas · 04/09/2021 16:47

I've got a bolter who is a pro at tantruming and if he had run off I would be very glad another mum had stopped him. You did the right thing

Standrewsschool · 04/09/2021 16:49

I’ve stood by and let my dc have a tantrum in a supermarket once. The difference was, I stood one metre away from here, and just let him scream and shout. It was obvious I was his mum.

In your situation, you did nothing wrong. He was running for the door and would have got out. And not just any door, but to the car park where he could potentially have got run over. The parents should be thanking you, not criticising. Plus it wasn’t obvious there were any parents nearby.

Beautiful3 · 04/09/2021 16:49

I would have done the same thing as you. You did the right thing. How are you to know, they're watching him run into a carpark from afar 🙄 stupid women. Also hate the way people are using the name Karen to slur someone. I know a few Karens and they're lovely people.

cerysderys · 04/09/2021 16:55

Are you sure one of them was his mother?! A tantrum is different from a panic.

I think I would have wanted to hand around to make sure it was all ok with him and them!

If it was a tantrum, they are the Karens thinking that ignoring is the right thing to do.

eggsandwich · 04/09/2021 16:56

I would of asked them if they would like me to enrol them in a parenting class as they obviously haven’t got a clue about children

ohthatbloodycat · 04/09/2021 16:56

Oh, what a pair of fucking bitches they were.
OP, you did not set a foot wrong Thanks

1WayOrAnother2 · 04/09/2021 16:57

Clearly, in this context 'Karen' must mean 'mother'. You were behaving like a mother - one who has children and knows how to care for them.

Well done you. The little lad might well have been hurt despite his guardians. It sounds as if they were a bit far away to care for him.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 04/09/2021 16:58

Good grief! Of course you did the right thing. What a pair of utter fuckwits.

He was running through the doors, no way would any normal person just allow that to happen.

StripeyFloorboards · 04/09/2021 16:58

You weren't in the wrong. Leaving a young child to run out into a car park and put themselves in danger is shit parenting, you did the right thing.

This. I’m angry on your behalf at their reaction.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 04/09/2021 16:59

@1WayOrAnother2

Clearly, in this context 'Karen' must mean 'mother'. You were behaving like a mother - one who has children and knows how to care for them.

Well done you. The little lad might well have been hurt despite his guardians. It sounds as if they were a bit far away to care for him.

It's not a mother thing. It's a human being thing.
itsgettingwierd · 04/09/2021 17:00

@MiaAnnabell3

Thanks everyone. I just felt silly and like I'd been overdramatic racing to stop him but I had no idea anyone was watching him.
But you weren't to know they were.

And if no one was ...........

This could have been a very different post.

Greystray · 04/09/2021 17:03

It sounds like they were letting him believe he was lost, poor kid.

If a Karen is the word for an interfering woman, what's the word for someone who lets their child panic for their own entertainment? I'd rather be a Karen than that person.

DarkDarkNight · 04/09/2021 17:12

That’s not a tantrum, it’s a distressed child. What would they have done if he had got out? How far were they going to let him go? They are idiots and you did the right thing.

Cakepop9 · 04/09/2021 17:14

They sound really awful, you sound amazing

Subbaxeo · 04/09/2021 17:16

If that were my child who had run off and someone had stopped him from potential injury or getting lost, I’d be so grateful. I’m glad there are people like you in the world!

Fetchthevet · 04/09/2021 17:19

@5zeds

You did the right thing. Do it again if it ever happens. People like you save children’s lives.
Completely agree. You were right in what you did and please don't let it put you off helping another child in the future.