Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Discovered (by accident) BIL is bankrupt. Do I tell SIL?

487 replies

PoppyWoods · 02/09/2021 20:08

Part of my job is to check the insolvency register. It's a public register, freely accessible to all.

I put in various names, mine, my parents, my sisters and brothers, not expecting to find anything. Anyway to my horror I discovered my BIL was declared bankrupt 3 months ago. It's definitely him as it lists full name, address and dob.

My SIL has never mentioned it. We're fairly close and she's disclosed very personal things to me in the past, so I'm wondering if she even knows. Is it even possible that he could go through the process and her be totally unaware?

My dilemma is, do I tell her or not? What if she doesn't know? What if she does know and she's so mortified she hasn't told anyone? What if she accuses me of snooping and interfering?

I honestly don't know what I do with this information (if anything). Appreciate your thoughts

OP posts:
motherofcatsandbears · 03/09/2021 01:00

Data Protection Act ring any bells? You could be sacked for for gross misconduct.

ThisBeTheName · 03/09/2021 01:01

@MyBadHabitsLeadToYou

I’m honestly beginning to think ThisBeTheName is the brother in law.
Yes, that'll be it.
user1471457751 · 03/09/2021 01:02

@motherofcatsandbears oh ffs, perhaps try reading a few posts before posting. Bankruptcy data is a matter of public record, anyone can look up that info. There are no data protection issues

MyBadHabitsLeadToYou · 03/09/2021 01:05

Well you seem to be taking it awfully personally 🤷🏻‍♀️

ThisBeTheName · 03/09/2021 01:08

@MyBadHabitsLeadToYou

Well you seem to be taking it awfully personally 🤷🏻‍♀️
As previously stated, I have an issue with interfering SILs.
ThisBeTheName · 03/09/2021 01:09

Although that is not relevant to the fact that the OP went looking for dirt, found it, and is now trying to defend herself.

ClareBlue · 03/09/2021 01:17

He has a history of gambling debts.
It is highly likely he has done this without her knowledge as that's what addicts do. It can and is done without spouses knowledge, but the spouse will have significant liabilities.

In her position I would be concerned for the SIL. How she knows this information will pale into insignificance when the assets start being sold. Some of the debts might even be in joint names without her knowledge. Just read some of the threads on being with a compulsive gambler to see what they will do to feed the addiction.

I would have to make sure she knew. Probably through the husband but the awkward conversation is nothing to a devistated, homeless family.

Jemand · 03/09/2021 01:21

@motherofcatsandbears

Data Protection Act ring any bells? You could be sacked for for gross misconduct.
Probably not, given that the Data Protection Act is totally irrelevant to information appearing on a public website.
Jemand · 03/09/2021 01:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

MurielSpriggs · 03/09/2021 01:26

@ThisBeTheName

Although that is not relevant to the fact that the OP went looking for dirt, found it, and is now trying to defend herself.
One of the things I'm liking about this thread is that she really isn't!

She's been pretty patient with those who cannot understand the concept of public information, and doesn't seem to give two hoots about the slightly hysterical outrage, which only seems to have further infuriated the outraged Grin

ClareBlue · 03/09/2021 01:37

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Quotes deleted post

motherofcatsandbears · 03/09/2021 02:07

Yes, I know that, but it’s part of her job. That is what’s covered by DPA ffs

MurielSpriggs · 03/09/2021 02:22

@motherofcatsandbears

Yes, I know that, but it’s part of her job. That is what’s covered by DPA ffs
Look @motherofcatsandbears, why would you come on here spouting absolute nonsense about something that you clearly know zippo about? Glue is often suspected in these situations, I believe. Does your understanding of the DPA extend anywhere beyond what the letters stand for? I mean it all adds to the entertainment value, but really! Grin
Cheeserton · 03/09/2021 02:31

You say nobody got hurt. Well, not yet of course, but if you go interfering in their relationship then somebody, or some people (you included) may well get very hurt.

'Snooped and interfered' would sum it up very well if you chose to go messing with the situation.

Also, don't ask for opinions (which obviously involve judgement on limited information) and then say folks are all judgemental when they provide. That's a nonsense.

BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 03/09/2021 02:48

@PoppyWoods

OK, it wasn't by accident and I snooped, but now I know do I do anything with that info?

No Data Protection issues, public register

Why say it was by accident when it clearly wasn't?
Rhinothunder · 03/09/2021 05:18

Anyone else tempted to search the register too now Grin

Rhinothunder · 03/09/2021 05:20

It's a difficult one OP. If he does have a history of addiction and insolvency I'd be inclined to try and privately and sensitively tell her what you know.

BarbaraofSeville · 03/09/2021 05:40

@ClareBlue

He has a history of gambling debts. It is highly likely he has done this without her knowledge as that's what addicts do. It can and is done without spouses knowledge, but the spouse will have significant liabilities.

In her position I would be concerned for the SIL. How she knows this information will pale into insignificance when the assets start being sold. Some of the debts might even be in joint names without her knowledge. Just read some of the threads on being with a compulsive gambler to see what they will do to feed the addiction.

I would have to make sure she knew. Probably through the husband but the awkward conversation is nothing to a devistated, homeless family.

Or she could know. She could have bought the beneficial interest in their home, or her parents or another relative could have.

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/debt-and-money/debt-solutions/bankruptcy-2/is-bankruptcy-right-for-you/will-you-lose-your-home-bankruptcy/

This can be done for a reasonably token sum if they've remortgaged to pay off previous debts and have little or no equity. Only time will tell as it only happened a few months ago.

She may have told him to do it as a condition of continuing their marriage, because now his access to money and particularly credit is strictly limited and controlled by the official receiver. His bankruptcy will affect her credit file if they have any joint accounts and will need to be declared when applying for insurance. If he has any disposable income, he will have an income payments order, to repay as much of his debts as he can afford, for the next 3 years.

On the matter of privacy, it's probably not a good idea to do stuff like this on work equipment in work time, but it's publicly available information, so the OP has done nothing wrong.

Any of us could do this. We could also find out how much anyone paid for their house or how much their mortgage is, although the latter is not as easy. You can find out the MOT history, tax and insurance details for their car. If they have professional qualifications, all the details are published online.

KeyWorker · 03/09/2021 06:54

I don’t really understand how part of you job is checking your friends and family against the insolvency register. What is it you do?

PoppyWoods · 03/09/2021 06:56

Who knew there would be such concern about my professional and employment status? Thanks to those armchair HR experts but that was really not necessary.

I'm also amused reviewing my character assignation, but you really missed the point.

It thought the question was relatively easy. I found out some information, it bothered me enough to ponder on whether I should do anything with it. Pros and cons sort of thing.

I've received that, so thank you. Some really interesting and thoughtful responses.

I haven't yet decided my approach yet but will discuss with DH first.

What I've definitely learned is that you must reach for your flak jacket when posting here. I've clearly touched a nerve or two.

💕

OP posts:
Oogachuckachopsy · 03/09/2021 07:00

What was the point that everyone missed? I suspect they were a bit sidetracked by how you came across when you said you looked up your entire family on the insolvency register (why the fuck would you do that? Confused) and were then chomping at the bit to make sure your sister in law knew her husband was bankrupt.

Someone’s bankrupt here, for sure.

bobbeebob · 03/09/2021 07:06

Would you get in trouble at work?

What about their GDPR policy?

Dont get yourself in trouble

crikey456 · 03/09/2021 07:10

I wouldn't say anything. In the least rude way, it isn't really anything to do with you. I don't think people should ever really stick their noses in other peoples lives. Say she doesn't know and you then split up their entire family, how are you going to feel about that?

The chances are that she already knows, but o really don't think it's your place to tell her if she doesn't.

BarbaraofSeville · 03/09/2021 07:23

GDPR is the 'cancel the cheque' on this thread. I'd be very surprised if any company's GDPR policy bans it's employees from looking at publicly available data.

BritWifeInUSA · 03/09/2021 07:26

@PoppyWoods

OK, it wasn't by accident and I snooped, but now I know do I do anything with that info?

No Data Protection issues, public register

That’s irrelevant that it’s a public register. You should only be accessing an individual’s data as and when your job requires it. Not to snoop on people you know.

She probably already knows. It’s pretty hard to hide a bankruptcy - you lose assets, access to your bank account, etc. It’s not a parking ticket that you can sheepishly pay and pretend it never happened.

I think you should go and tell her that you snooped and what you found out. Let us know what her reaction was, please.