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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to expect some random woman in Asda not to touch my baby's face ......?

30 replies

Willowwisp · 01/12/2007 22:33

I was pushing my trolley round Asda with my 14 week old daughter in the lay back seat, I turned my back to pick up some bread rolls and some random woman touched my daughters face tutted and said she was 'sucking the zip' on her snowsuit, she wasn't she was licking the material which she does all the time! She then proceeded to fold down the material on the suit, OMG I was so angry and embarrassed I couldn't say anything apart from 'oh'! She sucks and licks anything she can lay her hands on and I make sure its all safe! As if I would put her in danger by letting her suck a zip!

Am I being too sensitive?

Willow
xx

OP posts:

paulaplumpbottom · 01/12/2007 22:35

She was just being nice, not everyone's boundaries are diffrent

cadelaide · 01/12/2007 22:36

reckon your dd is gorgeous and she couldn't resist touching her. The zip thing was just an excuse.

Carmenere · 01/12/2007 22:36

A little too sensitive I think. Irritating and unwelcome as the interfearing busybody was presumeably she didn't mean any harm or criticsm. She may be from the 'it takes a village to raise a child' school of thought which is kind of nice.

themulledsnowmanneredjanitor · 01/12/2007 22:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cadelaide · 01/12/2007 22:37

So yeah, YABU, a bit.

coldtits · 01/12/2007 22:37

yes you are being too sensitive. Presuming she is your first? You will always be sensitive about your firstborn! Your second, you will be fine with it. your third you will be crowing "You touch, you buy!"

cadelaide · 01/12/2007 22:38

Yes Carmenere, I like that "takes a village.." thing.

Original poster

Willowwisp · 01/12/2007 22:39

Hiya

Having thought about it again, I think I am overeacting!! I've just had my first Aunt Flo she my little one was born and I'm feeling very hormonal!!

Thanks for telling me the truth ladies, I will stop thinking about it now!!!

She is a cutie so I can see why people want to touch her!!

Willow
xx

OP posts:

coldtits · 01/12/2007 22:40

paulaplumpbottom · 01/12/2007 22:40

Just remember that one day you to will be old and there wil be no little ones about and you won't be able to resist a bit of baby joy either.

cadelaide · 01/12/2007 22:42

Splendidly backed-down Willowwisp

agnesnitt · 01/12/2007 23:30

It's the nutters who try to wander off with your pram you have to worry about... They're scary!

Agnes

moondog · 01/12/2007 23:32

get a grip and be glad someone takes an interest. they wont when babe is a snotty 4 year old.

deeeja · 02/12/2007 01:18

Once a scary old lady was talking to my ds (now 2 and a half) at around this age in his buggy, he wasn't babbling at this age. It wasn't until half an hour later that I realised the mad old bat had undone the straps on his buggy.
I don't like it when ramdom strangers talk to my kids either!
So, just to throw a spanner in the works, I don't think you are being unreasonable!

ScottishMummy · 02/12/2007 01:24

eeeekkkkk!undid the straps...sinister or what

BeeWiseMen · 02/12/2007 09:52

willow, I would also have been really upset but then I also have pfb syndrome. You wouldn't believe some of the piddling stuff which gets me heart-in-my-mouth angry. I tend not to act on it though or say anything because I recognise that however I feel is probably unreasonable. In your situation I think I would comfort myself by thinking that woman was lonely and hadn't had a chance to touch a lovely little baby's cheek in years. It's probably not true but it would make me feel better about it.

And you'd better get used to random strangers accosting you in public to criticise whatever it is you're doing. It's the follow-up to random strangers touching your pregnancy bump

BibiThree · 02/12/2007 10:43

I get my fair share of mad old ladies pushing my twin girls around so I can sympathise. They don't mean any harm generally. My favourite so far: an old lady in the chemist who asked if she could see them and kept saying over and over "I won't touch them", the proceeded to play with their hands and touch their cheeks until my prescription came. She was quite sweet, if a bit bonkers, insisting that i'd had a happy pregnancy as they were happy babies (I hadn't particularly, it was quite stressful). Sh was obviously overjoyed at having two babbies smiling up at her so no harm done.

It does annoy me sometimes, but they rarely mean to offend. Take it as a sign of how adorable your lo is!

ScottishMummy · 02/12/2007 11:09

ah yes the twin touchers a common high street phenomenon - irresistibly drawn to it they are. saying really stupid obvious things like "oh twins" "don't they look alike"

Mags143 · 02/12/2007 11:31

My DD has madly curly hair, and people often ask "Is it naturally curly?" !! I'd love to say, "actually no, I,ve been at it all morning with the tongs"
Also had mad old lady trying to get DD's sock off when she was tiny, just so she could see her wee toes(?) It's different if it's someone you know and trust, but just some random person. Strange.

ScottishMummy · 02/12/2007 20:03

oh i love curly hair - largely because mine was so tuggy as a child - wanted curls

evenhope · 02/12/2007 20:15

I wonder if Asda is where all the mad old ladies hang out? I was looking at some baby dresses in there last week and turned round to see an old lady I didn't know touching my DD's hands and face I shot back to the trolley (I was about a step away) more because I realised that I'd left my handbag sitting on the seat next to DD and was concerned that the old dear (or someone else) could have snaffled my purse and I wouldn't have noticed.

She told me she loved little girls and had had 4 of her own now all grown up, so I let her carry on the stroking. Must admit it made me feel a bit grr though- and DD is my 5th, not a PFB.

Mercy · 02/12/2007 20:19

You are being a bit unreasonable.

But I understand at the same time - it's surprising how 'animal' we are when it comes to protecting our young, especially when it is your first child.

You are being naturally protective, but equally the other woman was just expressing her own motherly instinct.

I was regularly chased around supermarkets when dd was little - she had a huge quiff and she would stare at (engage?) people the whole time. One young woman got quite huffy because her partner kept pulling faces and grinning at dd!

Enjoy it while it lasts I say

MsSparkler · 02/12/2007 20:21

I don't think YABU because i think it's wrong that people just assume your going to be ok with them touching your baby. What people forget is just because their fine with people doing it that doesn't mean everyone is fine with it.

Leoladyofleisure · 02/12/2007 20:26

Willowwisp, I disagree, I think you were quite right to be upset. I hate random people touching my babies... talking to them asking questions is one thing, but touching crosses the line. (at 9 months the dts are now quite picky about who they will entertain though ) although I admit I'm too gutless to say anything and just move on as quickly as possible.

HomeintheSun · 02/12/2007 20:26

I live in Cyprus and my DS is very blond so gets loads of attention, although I'm always on my guard I take it as a compliment. I was a bit frantic when my vet walked off with him but they have an electronic gate so I knew he wouldn't run away with him.

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