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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF. DSD, DSDs mum and dog

982 replies

Purplewishes · 24/08/2021 20:31

Currently on mat leave with twins, also have a toddler and DSD13 who stays between 2-4 nights a week depending on what she wants to do.

Have a great relationship with DSD and been in her life since she was 4 and usually have a good relationship with her mum.

DSD has a dog at her mum's, it's a small dog, unsure of the breed, it's yappy and it's not house trained and still pees and shits in the house. (DSD tells me this) I am not a great lover of dogs (traumatic experience when I was younger so please don't let the dog lovers hate me) anyway DSD has been talking a lot recently about her dog and she should bring it to meet the twins (?) Obv met with a laugh and "no chance"

I got a message from her mum a few days ago "Hiya, just a random question, are you a dog person?" To which I replied no. She then messaged back and said "oh well if you want to take the dog this weekend for us then I'm sure you will become one" She has a weekend away with her partner that has been booked for ages (which we obv knew about for childcare for DSD) I messaged her back joking and said no way. A few messages back and forth and she explained that her dog care had fallen through at the last min and she's really stuck.
She said that she either will need to cancel the weekend or that me and DSD would need to travel back and forward to her house twice a day to walk the dog so that would be two half hour round trips. I said no that I would be busy and she Jokingly said it would give me something to do while on mat leave

Also to note DSD will be in school on the Thurs and friday so her mum would be expecting me, the toddler and the twins to all take the journey to walk the dog ourselves.

Spoke to DSD who has been begging me to allow the dog to come and I was starting to feel a bit guilty and was starting to consider it UNTIL she let the cat out of the bag and said her mum had never booked dog care in the first place and had told DSD the dog would always be coming with her to our house.

AIBU to just sit and laugh knowing there's not a fuckin chance in the world I'm doing it now

OP posts:
Original poster
Purplewishes · 26/08/2021 11:43

@coffeepot72 I read that big TONIGHT in Ian stirlings voice from love island

TOOOOONIGHT on dog island - will the dog appear with DSD????

OP posts:
Coffeepot72 · 26/08/2021 11:46

@Purplewishes I think I'm the only person on the planet who doesn't watch Love Island ...... :)

Muchmorethan · 26/08/2021 11:46

[quote Purplewishes]@coffeepot72 I read that big TONIGHT in Ian stirlings voice from love island

TOOOOONIGHT on dog island - will the dog appear with DSD????

[/quote]
What will you do if it does? Think you need to have a plan

SingToTheSky · 26/08/2021 11:47

This thread is definitely better than love island.

Muchmorethan · 26/08/2021 11:47

[quote Coffeepot72]@Purplewishes I think I'm the only person on the planet who doesn't watch Love Island ...... :)[/quote]
I don't either

BlowDryRat · 26/08/2021 11:48

Good for you OP. Even if she hadn't lied, you're not obliged to walk/house anyone else's dog. I wouldn't be responsible for a dog for love nor money. If I wanted to do that then I'd get my own!

prettybird · 26/08/2021 11:48

Me neither Wink

Original poster
Purplewishes · 26/08/2021 11:52

@muchmorethan think if dog shows up il handle it like a footballer, throw it up in the hair and punt it over next doors fence. Grin

Honestly though, don't have a fuckin clue what I will do.

OP posts:
MissBridgetJones · 26/08/2021 11:54

I can't tell you how much I am here for this thread. I'm thinking of cancelling my plans this afternoon around 4pm for an update on Doggate.

MadeForThis · 26/08/2021 11:56

Of it shows up book it in to the kennels and she can pay the bill when she picks it up.

LittleMysSister · 26/08/2021 11:58

@Purplewishes

Sorry guys been up to my tits in kids.

So I replied to her and just said that it might not be a big deal for her but it was too much to ask on short notice and I already struggle during day with my own plans never mind throwing in a dog walk.

There was a bit of back and forth texting and I eventually just said, look am not doing it.

She replied with a very blunt "okay fine" and .... A thumbs up emoji

Now I don't know about you but a thumbs up emoji is the highest order of being a cheeky bastard which had be absolutely fucking raging.

Anyway. Who's getting dog appears at the door after school?

I am SO PLEASED you stuck to your guns!!!

This woman is ridiculous.

I don't understand how she has no one in her life OR her partner's life to look after her dog, except for her ex's wife and her ex's mum?!?!?! Does she not have any friends? Any family of her own?

Although maybe her behaviour here demonstrates why that might be Wink.

MzHz · 26/08/2021 11:59

[quote Purplewishes]@muchmorethan think if dog shows up il handle it like a footballer, throw it up in the hair and punt it over next doors fence. Grin

Honestly though, don't have a fuckin clue what I will do.[/quote]
Well THAT was tea rapidly expelled out my nose!
:D

deliciouschilli · 26/08/2021 11:59

DDog probably hasn't had jabs so won't be able to go into kennels......?

LittleMysSister · 26/08/2021 12:04

Do not put the dog in kennels because you'll never get the money back from her.

Hopefully she'll have had to go grovelling to a friend, or her partner will have.

I honestly don't know what I'd do if SD actually turned up with the dog?!

Muchmorethan · 26/08/2021 12:05

[quote Purplewishes]@muchmorethan think if dog shows up il handle it like a footballer, throw it up in the hair and punt it over next doors fence. Grin

Honestly though, don't have a fuckin clue what I will do.[/quote]
I would refuse to allow it in the house and would take it to the nearest vet. A kennel or dog sitter will probably want paying in advance.

Mummyoflittledragon · 26/08/2021 12:09

If you call the dog warden stating the dog has been abandoned at yours for the weekend, I imagine they will collect the dog and call the owner to collect.

ChickpeaCrunch · 26/08/2021 12:18

Yes call the dog warden if it's dumped on you

Monestera · 26/08/2021 12:19

Does anyone else silently despair a little when a thread hits the “snorting tea all over my keyboard” and “OP you’re my hero” stage?

CherryHug · 26/08/2021 12:25

Can't you scare her out of potentially trying to dump the dog on you, that if she does bring it over, you will take it to the dogs home? (I know you obviously wouldn't but might put the fear of god into her to not be a dickhead??)

CherryHug · 26/08/2021 12:26

Sorry I have been only viewing the OP's posts, and see now thats basically been suggested

CherryHug · 26/08/2021 12:27

[quote Purplewishes]@muchmorethan think if dog shows up il handle it like a footballer, throw it up in the hair and punt it over next doors fence. Grin

Honestly though, don't have a fuckin clue what I will do.[/quote]
Hand the dog back, and say "Oh no, no thank you, I couldn't possibly eat another one."

2mutsandsomebabies · 26/08/2021 12:28

OP you can't call the dog warden on DSD dog because it will traumatise her. You will come across as in the wrong, even though you are not. You need to get you DH to make a plan here. His EX, His daughter, His daughters dog.
Maybe you'll go stay with your mum or friend and he can sort out this madness and pick up the poop but it is not to be you.

You sound like a brilliant step mum and this woman shouldn't get the chance to make you look like the unreasonable one. Step away from the dog shit!

Phobiaphobic · 26/08/2021 12:30

@2mutsandsomebabies

OP you can't call the dog warden on DSD dog because it will traumatise her. You will come across as in the wrong, even though you are not. You need to get you DH to make a plan here. His EX, His daughter, His daughters dog. Maybe you'll go stay with your mum or friend and he can sort out this madness and pick up the poop but it is not to be you.

You sound like a brilliant step mum and this woman shouldn't get the chance to make you look like the unreasonable one. Step away from the dog shit!

This. Why isn't this HIS problem? I'd be rapidly making it his problem to sort out, not mine.
rookiemere · 26/08/2021 12:33

I'm not convinced the dog warden would come anyway. The dog isn't a genuine stray and you'd need nerves of steel to ring them up in this scenario as it's not a genuine stray.