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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

When did you stop taking your children on holiday with you?

119 replies

mutedrainbows · 21/08/2021 18:30

*lighthearted thread

My husband and I are having a disagreement. We have some family friends who are on holiday in Mexico. They're staying in an amazing villa - think huge terrace with beautiful views, an infinity pool, access to a private chef, etc. They just sent some photos through and we saw that their 17 year old son is with them.

My husband (English) thinks it's very weird that he's there with them. In his opinion, once you hit 16/17, you stop going on holiday with your parents because you'd rather stay home alone with the house to yourself (and probably get pissed with your mates) than lay by the pool with your parents for two weeks.

I (American) on the other hand think it's normal and 17 year old me would've been quite put out if my parents went on a holiday like that and I had to stay home alone and cook for myself Grin

Fair enough if you're wanting a romantic holiday for just the two of you but I don't see anything wrong with taking your children on holiday with you into adulthood!

So please settle our debate. Leave the kids at home to party or helicopter parent?

OP posts:
flapjackfairy · 21/08/2021 19:41

My 31 yr old son and 21 yr old daughter have just been on holiday with us and their younger siblings . Long may it last I say . Grin

ivfbabymomma1 · 21/08/2021 19:43

I think I was 16 when I stopped and then I went on my own holidays. But I'm now 34 and have since been away with my parents (and DH & DS)

lanbro · 21/08/2021 19:44

I had my last holiday with parents at 16, then realised the error of my ways and went again with them in my 20s (they paidGrin). Now, in my 40s, I would still go for weekends away with them with my dc too

theDudesmummy · 21/08/2021 19:46

Have not rtft but just spent a great family holiday in Croatia with DDs aged 28 and 26, and their boyfriends. They are both at university so we paid.

cardibach · 21/08/2021 19:47

I was definitely go8ng away with my parents until I was 18. My daughter came away for a weekend this summer. She’s 25.

SunSeaSurfGin · 21/08/2021 19:47

@FangsForTheMemory

Would depend on the holiday. No way would I have missed a trip to Mexico.
This

I go away with my parents for holidays or part of holidays even now. At 17 and to Mexico? Yell yes!

WillaWeatherspoon · 21/08/2021 19:52

At no point did I stop going away with my parents, although at 18 I did start going on holiday with friends or boyfriends too. I'll be 37 next year and have a holiday booked with my parents, sister, her DH, my DH and our two children. Can't wait!

bigbluebus · 21/08/2021 19:53

DS definitely came with us until he went to Uni at 18. After that we tended to go in term time so he wasn't around to come with us. We have only been away in this country for the last 3 summers so he hasn't come with us but I'm pretty sure if we were going abroad and he was free (and invited) he'd happily come with us (as long as we were paying!) He's 24 now.

RampantIvy · 21/08/2021 20:00

Doesn't it depend on whether thwy have friends/partners to go away with?

WhatHaveIFound · 21/08/2021 20:01

Friends of mine aged 50 & 58 have just been on holiday with their 78 year old parent. To be fair they're all single.

BoredZelda · 21/08/2021 20:04

Still go on holidays with my parents. The only difference is, since I started earning, I started paying for myself.

It’s lovely to spend time with them.

HelloMissus · 21/08/2021 20:05

Rampant in my experience no.
They just go with friends and partners as well as us Grin

BigSandyBalls2015 · 21/08/2021 20:10

I think part of it is due to a lot of people having better holidays these days.

I stopped going at 16 as wasn’t keen on damp cottages in the middle of nowhere when we lived near London.

My DDs are 20 and still seem to enjoy a holiday with us. They do hols/weekends with friends and partners too but def wouldn’t turn down another holiday. Sometimes bring their mates too.

Bunnycat101 · 21/08/2021 20:12

If my parents had gone anywhere like Mexico I’d have been with them like a shot. I think holidays as young adults and parents would ease the transition to holidays with the grandchildren. My husband and his parents had massive rows when they went away together as they were still in the mode that he was a child rather than a 30 yo with a family of his own.

Longdistance · 21/08/2021 20:14

@HelloMissus I hope so. I’ve just remembered taking my dm with me to her home country a few times in my 20’s and once with df and dm in my 30’s. Only to see relatives, but still a holiday. I remember taking dm to Rome ti see the Pope. She loved every minute.

sbhydrogen · 21/08/2021 20:16

Our last family holiday was when I was 21. My siblings were 23, 26 and 28! We had a great time - I see it as going out with a bang.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 21/08/2021 20:19

I'll let you know-

My DC are 25, 23 and 20 and still all come.

Sometimes not the whole time-have a better offer, work commitments etc but I find on the whole if we are paying and going somewhere nice they jump at the chance.

I love going on holiday with them-great company and we enjoy spending time together not as much of a novelty now as we have all spent lockdown together but the point still stands

RampantIvy · 21/08/2021 20:20

@HelloMissus

Rampant in my experience no. They just go with friends and partners as well as us Grin
Grin In fairness in 2018 DD went on a post A levels girls holiday, a long weekend with her then boyfriend, and then on holiday with us. The holiday with us included her best friend in the party.

Life has moved on and she doesn't have anyone to holiday with just now, so she came with us this year.

Angel2702 · 21/08/2021 20:23

I think I only missed one holiday age 18 as had something else going on. We still go on holiday with family now.

hiredandsqueak · 21/08/2021 20:23

We try and have one holiday a year with all dc, partners and gc and dogs. Eldest ds is mid thirties. Had holidays without him though from him being 16/17 just depended on what our and their plans were.

Roselilly36 · 21/08/2021 20:26

Sorry to break it to you OP, mine are 20 & 18, and still love going on holiday with us!

MeadowHay · 21/08/2021 20:30

I'm 27 and the last holiday I went on was me, DH, DD, DM and DB, mostly paid for by DM. And we've all booked another similar albeit much much cheaper holiday for next summer except we will be paying for ourselves this time, will also have DC2 with us and will be staying in separate accomodation this time. I don't think it's unusual for extended families to holiday together, some or my friends are about ten years older than me and often holiday with their parents/wider families too.

Foxmylife · 21/08/2021 20:32

Dd 19 is booked to come with us next year, in theory Im happy to do this until she finushes uni if she wants too but she does my head in when we go away, so we’ll see.

TreaslakeandBack · 21/08/2021 20:34

Never stopped and am 44. We usually have one holiday just us and one with my parents.
Not been with them since 2019 but hoping to do so next year- my mum hates UK holidays which is what we have done the past 2 years.

Darthwader · 21/08/2021 20:35

I'm be bringing mine until they refuse to come. Then I think they'll probably take a few years out and be open to coming again when they get a bit older.