Are some people actually this oblivious?

[TinyTroubleMaker]

OK so I'm on a campsite run by a well known membership body. We've been on site a while and used other sites. People are usually pretty sedate. Here so far, it gets dark around 8-9, people are quiet and respectful of others, everything goes quiet, everyone goes to sleep. Anyone who is up is more or less silent. Might sound boring to some but it works, means everyone gets a good rest and it's pleasant.

Tonight, a group arrived I think then went out. At twenty to eleven, they've returned and 1. Driven their van with headlights shining into tents waking everyone up. I can hear my neighbours awake by this 2. Kept engine running for what seems like quite a while 3. Slammed all the doors on their vehicle repeatedly 4. Got children out and let them yell everything they have to say loudly, without quietening them because others are asleep 5. Parents (or I think 2 women with 4 or so kids) not at all keeping their voices down either in talking to the kids 6. Once inside their tent / caravan continuing to say everything at top of voices which on a campsite carries at night 7. Still outside 30 minutes on, keeping half the campsite awake. Compared to every other camper I've experienced on this trip and other trips this summer, they have really poor manners.

It should be obvious every tent around them is dark, people are sleeping, and this behaviour is therefore going to wake multiple people. Within a certain area, say 15 tents at least with average 3-4 people each. More tents beyond that probably.

So, either they know this and think they are more important than literally everyone around them (and genuinely believe it's necessary to carry on at they are without even attempting to lower voices) or they are so oblivious that they actually can't figure out how anti social they are being.

I am so grateful we've had such fantastic fellow campers for days and days now but so disappointing to have to deal with this near the end of our stay.

Not sure what the AIBU is exactly, other than - can people really be this oblivious to their effect on others?

Most campsites have their ‘quiet time’ detailed as being between 10 or 11pm and 8am, when they ask people to be respectful and keep noise to a minimum.

You’re complaining about them driving their car back to their tent with the lights on….how were they to see without them?

Personally I think you’re being quite pernickety. They’re on holiday, it wasn’t the middle of the night but about 11pm. How do you get things and people in and out of cars without opening and closing the doors?

I’m a camper…I camped with toddlers, children etc. I have never expected everyone else tucked up by 10.

You can complain if you like but I doubt it’ll hold up.

Yes, they are rude, but I can't imagine being in bed by 1030pm when on holiday, unless I was 85, so that seems very weird!

We had similar on holiday in the Caribbean. We were all sleeping in individual beach huts. Every morning a German family would put their loungers outside our hut at 7am and wake us up by talking at the top of their voices and smoking weed. They had a hut of their own! They liked to go to bed early, but we got our own back by sitting outside of their hut at 1am with the stereo blasting music and when they came outside looking confused we told them it was pay back time.

Selfish yes, but I doubt if they think it anything wrong. Let the people who run the place know, and say you'll support them if the group concerned are not allowed to stay there again.

Being quiet from 8-9pm does not sound like my idea of fun

But that’s why I don’t do campinh

I once paid a fortune for glamping where all my fellow glampers thought that it was a license to party hard - outdoor cinema, late cricket matches etc.
It put me off camping forever.

Winding down at 8 and "murmuring" is probably not what they had in mind since they're on holiday.

Can't believe they put the van lights on to drive through a field of sleeping campers either. How dare they?

Some noise until 11pm is fine - since those are the rules on a lot of campsites. Anyone camping with small children needs to accept that timings will be different from at home... or not go camping. Kids are usually still running around until 9pm ish ime,and adults are sitting out chatting over drinks (if it's warm enough!). I'm typing this from my sleeping bag in my tent right now. No sound of people yet, but the cows are quite loud .

I’m a camper, in fact I’m on a camping trip right now. For those saying that you can’t expect people to be quiet so early on their holiday some of us choose family friendly campsites that have specified quiet times because we don’t want to camp alongside selfish people like these.
There are campsites that are more party friendly where people can stay up late in groups and have music and make noise etc and these campers should have booked one of these campsites.
It’s just about consideration for your neighbours. We are on a family holiday with young children so don’t want to be tired from disturbed sleep late at night or early in the morning from fellow campers so we choose to camp in a site where there are quiet times and usually people respect these rules.

I've had this on campsites a lot - it's the main thing that put me off camping, too many people who don't give a shit that kids need sleep and are going to be wakened by the sun at 6am, making noise until late into the night.

Drinking, playing music, allowing older kids and teens to run around making a lot of noise until late. We just don't camp any more due to so much antisocial noise, last time we did after 3 nights our young children were just exhausted from lack of sleep.

Are they in a tent or caravan?

If ifs a caravan chuck loads of bread on the roof really early in the morning, the birds will love it and be very noisy on the roof.

I can't imagine being in bed by 1030pm when on holiday

In midsummer children (and adults!) are generally wakened by the sun when camping, meaning they are wide awake at 5.30am if you are lucky. Many family camping groups do indeed head to bed relatively early knowing a lie in is near impossible.

Yeah other people can be a pain in the ass. Especially the noisy ones who don’t give a shit. It’s a gamble you have to take if you go to a campsite or caravan-type holiday.

Other than politely asking them to shut the fuck up there’s not much else you can do. After a few similar experiences on caravan sites I have vowed never to do that kind of en-masse site again. Detached holiday cottages for me going forward. It’s not worth the stress. And unfortunately it does end up ruining your holiday as some people just give zero fucks for everyone else.

Also just to add, this campsite I’m currently on is quiet after 11 but people start to quieten down by time it gets dark and it’s almost silent by 10pm. If you look around some people are sleeping or getting kids to bed so it’s just a matter of being considerate of other people and not being so selfish!

Also ime its not unusual to retire early on british campsites because the temperature drops rapidly from 9pm as the sun goes down and it's simply cold!

Those of you put off camping by noise try the camping and caravanning club sites. We always stay on them and have never had an issue with inconsiderate fellow campers. In fact everyone is usually very respectful, considerate and friendly on these sites

Why didn't you just shout:
"Keep the noise down".

The op is on one of those sites isn't she?!

Headlights and doors and a bit of loud voices I could understand. First night, been out, trying to get back to the tent and all that. But then it should have quietened down. Are you all up singing camp songs next to their rent yet?

Whether YABU or not depends on the site rules, not what you have happened to witness over a few previous nights. The swearing would have annoyed me if my DCs were still up (when camping, once asleep they are dead to the world), but otherwise it doesn't sound too awful.
We purposefully avoid the camping-in-rows, long-list-of funsucking -rules types of campsite, as to us it feels more like a military exercise than a holiday, and often means being placed far too close to other groups. We've just returned from a lovely site where the only behaviour rule was no amplified music after 10.30. A reasonable rule and nobody took the piss. Some came back from daytrips after dark and trundled across the field using headlights (it would be a bit bloody dangerous not to!). You could often hear distant chatting and laughter across the site until 1-2am because the sound carries, but it wasn't an issue as nobody was actually that close so it wasn't particularly loud. It was nice hearing the happy sounds as I drifted off to sleep. The only noise that annoyed me was the never-ending acoustic guitar on the first night, but that's due to my personal dislike of campfire songs! It didn't break any rules, so it wouldn't have occurred to me to complain. Being silent from 8 or 9 sounds miserable.

I suspect if you asked them about it, they'd say they're on holiday and think that being quiet by 8pm is unreasonable.

@ThatsNotMyReindeer

This is a time that "will you shut the fuck up?!" at the top of your voice from within your tent will have you hailed a hero

That’s what my first thought was Usually does the trick

Yep, they know damn well they're doing it and enjoy it.. a word with your site warden today should help

I’m horrified at all the suggestions of shouting shut the fuck up. I’m a quiet camper, but there is no need to be like that. We’re all different and if you are that bothered by the noise of others, save up and go to a hotel.

We were camping, there were several tents, the twats in the camper van parked next to the tents sat out in their awning drinking and shouting, laughing for hours waking everyone up.
At 3a.m someone went and asked them to be quiet as they had a 5 hr drive home that day and needed some sleep. Their response………… well you should get a camper van instead of a tent then, that way you won’t be disturbed

OP I sympathise. I'm a morning person and love a quiet, early night. Camping is not for me. We've just got home from a week in a very secluded holiday cottage, 5 min walk from a Cornish cove. The DCs went to bed at 8pm and we went at 10pm. No noise at all. Luckily we know the owners so got a good deal as some self catering holidays are extortionate this year. DH does all the driving, shopping and cooking as he enjoys it.