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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My parents are Anti-Vax and think they are more clever

112 replies

Mikadua23 · 15/08/2021 09:38

My parents are in their early 50s , both work and when covid first started my mum was first to go and wear face mask and buy boxes of antibac gels of from amazon.

Now... they think covid is basically a piece of shit made of story and they laugh at people who still wear masks or take the vaccine suggesting that the are the "clever ones" because they know more.
I guess it's easy for them to say and laugh when they haven't actually lost anyone due to covid(luckily) .....
I personally know friends who had lost their loved ones and my views are completely different.
I stop pushing them to get the vaccination because each time I have it ended in big arguments.
I had covid while being pregnant and seriously it was the worst 2 weeks of my life, luckily I didn't need to be hospitalised.

They aren't scientists or doctors and it passes me right off that they gather their knowledge from Google/Facebook and other ridiculous sources. 🙄

I want them to be safe.

They believe that all vaccinated people will basically die soon due to effect and that the vaccination is being tested on us right now.

I wouldn't care any longer about their views if not that every single thing that happens is seen as a covid vaccine side effect, for example - my auntie got lost last weekend, she basically got herself so drunk to the point she passed out and nobody was able to find her.
She was so drunk that she fell and slept on grass on the country side.
Whole family was very worried, she has been found safe after a good few hours however my parents put it down to Covid vaccine side effects and she had her jab 1 week before.

It is getting really ridiculous.
I just hate the little mean comments they make towards me or my husband trying to make a point to show us that we are worse than them for getting the vaccine or believing in covid.

Ugh.

OP posts:
Dolphinnoises · 15/08/2021 09:40

Have they been online a lot?

Scottishskifun · 15/08/2021 09:41

It's not going anywhere so at one point they will get it and probably change their tune very quickly.

Best thing is to shut the conversation down whenever they start it if they won't ask them to leave.

Original poster
Mikadua23 · 15/08/2021 09:42

@Dolphinnoises yes , my 17 year old brother doesn't help with sending them some videos and rubbish stuff (they also believe that the earth is flat) .........

OP posts:
FedUpAtHomeTroels · 15/08/2021 10:15

You need some stock answers to there snide remarks.
I'm sure our clever mumsnetters can come up with some.
I've ended up removing some people from facebook for all the stupid stuff they spout. If they were virologists or something like that I'd at least see what they have to say. But someone with no education, no GCSE's no medical knowledge trying to tell me "how it is" are just ridiculous.

Original poster
Mikadua23 · 15/08/2021 10:16

@FedUpAtHomeTroels exactly!

OP posts:
trunumber · 15/08/2021 10:21

Do they really believe the earth is flat?!

If so don't engage with them on any of it, it's entirely pointless but you have to just let it go or you will drive yourself mad

Buccanarab · 15/08/2021 10:35

There needs to be some sort of intelligence/critical thinking test before people are allowed full access to the internet. It's terrifying the number of people who seem to think a meme or 2 minute video is sufficient research to form an opinion.

You can always try to out conspiracy the conspiracy nutters if you want a little bit of fun.

They believe that all vaccinated people will basically die soon due to effect and that the vaccination is being tested on us right now.

So for this I'd go with something like: "What?? You really think the NWO are going to kill of all the people who have complied with their orders and taken the vaccine? That's ridiculous! This has all been a test to see who will follow them into the new world, pretty soon they'll release the new strain of covid and it will be 100% fatal to the unvaccinated, that way they'll get rid of everyone who doesn't believe/listen to them in one swoop and have a fully compliant population for stage 2."

They'll be down for the vaccine before you've finished saying "swoop".

GoWalkabout · 15/08/2021 10:38

This stuff is being promoted by disruptive state influences, social media is a dream for them. www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/media/2021/may/25/influencers-say-russia-linked-pr-agency-asked-them-to-disparage-pfizer-vaccine

dudsville · 15/08/2021 10:40

I wouldn't bother engaging with, replying to or instigating discussions with them on these topics. If they believe the earth is flat, etc., then they're working from an entirely different way of thinking. No bridge crosses that divide. They'll only change their minds if people from their way of thinking change and convince them to do the same. Don't worry if they think they're smarter, the dumbest people often do.

GoWalkabout · 15/08/2021 10:41

And on a tangent, our teenagers are being targeted as well as our parents, my dd started talking about investment she had seen on Tiktok apparently "investment advice" is all over there now - make sure your teens know to be savvy - www.thetimes.co.uk/article/teenagers-turn-to-tiktok-for-investment-tips-dpzpdst7m

saraclara · 15/08/2021 10:51

@dudsville

I wouldn't bother engaging with, replying to or instigating discussions with them on these topics. If they believe the earth is flat, etc., then they're working from an entirely different way of thinking. No bridge crosses that divide. They'll only change their minds if people from their way of thinking change and convince them to do the same. Don't worry if they think they're smarter, the dumbest people often do.
I wouldn't bother seeing them, either.

This would do my head in and wreck my relationship with any close family member.

Does your brother think the same way, or is he just winding them up?

longwayoff · 15/08/2021 11:01

Shout 'stay away from the edge' every time they go out.

Cornettoninja · 15/08/2021 11:18

In all honesty I’d give up with them for the time being. If they couldn’t drop the subject completely around me I’d be telling them I’ll try again in a few months when they’d calmed down a bit.

This struck me though:

They believe that all vaccinated people will basically die soon due to effect and that the vaccination is being tested on us right now

If I genuinely believed this and my loved ones had taken irreversible vaccinations I wouldn’t be treating them badly, I’d be spending as much quality time with them as I possibly could. It’s basically laughing and taunting someone they believe is going to die??

I’ve only seen one video where someone was acting like a normal human over the possibility their loved ones were risking their life by taking a vaccine. It was a father begging his daughter not to vaccinate and he was massively distressed because he truly believed what he was saying.

If your parents are contemptuous of you and other family members decision to vaccinate I would suggest they need to take a good look at themselves. You’re not strangers to them, they’re treating you all like shit despite the belief you’re all going to die/be seriously ill. It’s psychotic.

thisisthebestest · 15/08/2021 11:20

I don't understand why it's any of your business or why you care?

Until he know the long-term effects of Covid and the vaccine we won't know who's right, so just leave it.

Live and let live.

Oldraver · 15/08/2021 11:21

I bet they have 'done their research' and 'the truth will out soon'

Mantlemoose · 15/08/2021 11:25

In a similar position so it just isn't a topic we discuss. I think I'm right they think they're right. I don't want them to try to convert me to their way of thinking so why should I try to do this to them? Let them get on with their beliefs surely?

CrazyNeighbour · 15/08/2021 11:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SmashingBlouson · 15/08/2021 11:27

Just say " I don't talk about anything COVID related anymore and will not participate in a conversation about it". That's what I say. It goes both ways though.

lljkk · 15/08/2021 11:37

I imagine OP cares because her parents are having a go at OP for making choices they deride.

I hope you can find a way to convince them that they should stop criticising your choices, OP.

I'm slightly opposite in that my dad rants about vaccine-hesitant people being selfish terrible people. I had the jab but am fervently pro-choice on it. I work hard to change the conversation in such moments.

Theunamedcat · 15/08/2021 11:43

Stock answers that can include

Mmm is your will upto date?
Do you have a DNR?
have you written down your wishes about medical intervention? Somewhere we will find them if needed please

Lighthearted ones would be, and in other news (change the subject quickly)
(Ross geller) anyway....

You could be open and honest and ask not to discuss it because you will never agree

Buccanarab · 15/08/2021 11:45

Until he know the long-term effects of Covid and the vaccine we won't know who's right, so just leave it.

Long-term effects of vaccines, if they are going to be any, will reveal themselves within three months. We're well past that period of concern that there may be some unknown side effects cropping up now. But you don't want to hear that I'm sure.

bobandhisburgers · 15/08/2021 11:48

I wouldn't engage with people who genuinely think the earth is flat. They're batshit.

PurpleMustang · 15/08/2021 12:03

The polite thing to do would be to say you don't want to talk about it any more. If they keep trying or make comments then start making a few back as said above. Or go the full hog and say, "hope your funerals and bought and paid up". Bet they are not saying this rubbish to everyone and you don't want to hear it either

thisisthebestest · 15/08/2021 13:17

@Buccanarab

Until he know the long-term effects of Covid and the vaccine we won't know who's right, so just leave it.

Long-term effects of vaccines, if they are going to be any, will reveal themselves within three months. We're well past that period of concern that there may be some unknown side effects cropping up now. But you don't want to hear that I'm sure.

3 months is not long term.

Short term (less than 3 months):

I have a friend who went permanently blind in one eye immediately following her vaccine (blood clot - vaccine was stated on her hospital notes as cause)

Long term (more than 3 months) :

I also know of several female friends who's periods have not returned to normal following vaccine. One was TTC and now can't.
This is longer term as it's been over 3 months.

We don't know the long term effects of covid or the vaccine. 3 months is not long term!

thisisthebestest · 15/08/2021 13:17

@Buccanarab

Until he know the long-term effects of Covid and the vaccine we won't know who's right, so just leave it.

Long-term effects of vaccines, if they are going to be any, will reveal themselves within three months. We're well past that period of concern that there may be some unknown side effects cropping up now. But you don't want to hear that I'm sure.

3 months is not long term.

Short term (less than 3 months):

I have a friend who went permanently blind in one eye immediately following her vaccine (blood clot - vaccine was stated on her hospital notes as cause)

Long term (more than 3 months) :

I also know of several female friends who's periods have not returned to normal following vaccine. One was TTC and now can't.
This is longer term as it's been over 3 months.

We don't know the long term effects of covid or the vaccine. 3 months is not long term!