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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU husband and waitress?

214 replies

Millionnewnames · 13/08/2021 11:33

Husband and I own a small cafe. We live in the flat above with my parents. We have two young girls working for us front of house, they are delightful and hardworking.
After noticing we were running low on a few things in the kitchen I went down into the cellar to get them and found one of the waitresses draped around my husband. I furiously asked WTF he was doing and he called me ‘a stupid woman’ and told me the girl had fainted after seeing a huge spider clambering about in the onions. He was stopping her from hurting herself as she fell.
I’m not sure what to think now.

P.s lighthearted. Bored. Guess the show and add your own.

OP posts:
AutistGoth · 13/08/2021 14:41

Good advice, @Mathscourses. Or failing that, @Nc123 could always try her luck with the handsome, long haired mysterious illusionist who lives in a rural windmill and try her hand at solving some crimes whilst she's at it?

Great idea for a thread, @Millionnewnames. Have nominated it for Classics. Grin

foxandbee · 13/08/2021 14:44

I am a live in carer for an old man. He is not so bad. But it is his son's apartment and the son is a pretentious arse. He thinks he is a big star because he has some stupid phone in radio show on local radio. There is another son who lives elsewhere with his very odd wife. He is foppish and fussy. They all drive me mad, really, but I am sort of fond of them.

MrsMoastyToasty · 13/08/2021 14:45

My school friend has just arrived at my apartment (I'm in New York) in a wedding dress and says she's not marrying her fiancé. She wants to move in with me, but I'm very particular about things. A bit OCD.
The thing is my brother, who lives locally, is having a hard time with his partner who has just admitted she is gay . I'm trying to support him. He always had a crush on my friend at high school and I think he might still be in love with her.
Meanwhile the guys in the flat across the landing are in and out of my place like they own it.

Killahangilion · 13/08/2021 14:53

I live on the same landing as two old codgers who expect me to cook them their Christmas dinner every year but the auld gits won’t lend me their record player for the old folks home Christmas dinner dance.

Their mate Winston who has one leg, promised me a lovely fresh Turkey but it turned out to be so fresh, it was still walking around the Toon.

I’m also still waiting for my manager to declare his undying love after he previously snogged me passionately when his wife went abroad for a week last summer.

They’re all good boys really but my fanny still aches for Richard, the king of Countdown.

AutistGoth · 13/08/2021 14:55

@Icecreamsoda99 Whatever you do, tell your DS that he must never sing rude songs to a German soldier or to tell him his name!

And ensure he's wearing the scarf you made him at all times. You don't want him getting croup, do you?

Maireas · 13/08/2021 14:59

@Icecreamsoda99

Single mum with an 17 year old son. Long term relationship with a man but think he might be a cocklodger, always comes to mine for meals and spends the night (my son doesn't know about spending the night and calls him uncle). I'm hoping he will propose but I've been waiting years. He's much posher than I am and went to one of those public schools. It's further complicated by the fact he's my son's line manager. Not sure if I should kick him out or just accept things won't change and keep calm and carry on.
Wait until the Americans arrive and get yourself one of those. And some nylons!
Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:02

@foxandbee

I am a live in carer for an old man. He is not so bad. But it is his son's apartment and the son is a pretentious arse. He thinks he is a big star because he has some stupid phone in radio show on local radio. There is another son who lives elsewhere with his very odd wife. He is foppish and fussy. They all drive me mad, really, but I am sort of fond of them.
They've welcomed you into the family. You join in dinner parties and go on holidays with them. I'd cultivate a friendship with the brother, he sounds lonely. Try to forget about your family in Manchester. They're arses. Plus have weird accents.
Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:05

@MrsMoastyToasty - well, if she's jilted a man at the altar, and your brother is vulnerable, who knows what will happen? Encourage her to get a job. Oh, and maybe a new haircut would perk her up?.

Mathscourses · 13/08/2021 15:07

@AutistGoth, I think @Nc123 might do well with the long-haired illusionist, but only if she can help him get over his obsession with blue whales.

PennyPinkPineapple · 13/08/2021 15:09

I've recently started a new job in a bookshop. The owner is an aggressive lazy Irish drunk who chain smokes and the mad woman who runs the shop next door is always popping round. The other day I had to eat scrambled egg out of a shoe with a comb. Do you think I should look for alternative employment?

Icecreamsoda99 · 13/08/2021 15:15

@whyayepetal Frank, is that you? Come home now your tea's getting cold

@AutistGoth good advice, and I've knitted him a lovely scarf

@Maireas ooh! I'd forgotten about them, also I do like the Town Clerk - but only if he lets me be Lady Godiva in the Spitfire Fund Procession

OhRene · 13/08/2021 15:18

Hmmm... I may know that one OP. Reminds me of my username..

Does your father have a Ticky-ticker?

Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:20

@Icecreamsoda99 - if you're lucky you might be a GI bride! No rationing or shortages there!

ScottChegg · 13/08/2021 15:21

What should I do? My DH is a solid, dependable type I suppose, he doesn't cheat, or drink or anything like that. But, idk, he's really... boring and parochial. He loves nothing more than a committee and takes it all terribly seriously. We never have any fun.

We have a new neighbour. He's a single man and everything DH isn't, witty, devil may care, urbane. I can feel there's a spark between us but, I just don't think I could do anything about it... or could I? Could I break the habit of a lifetime and do something wild?! Increasingly I find DH infuriating and I can't help wondering, what if... What should I do??

QueenBee52 · 13/08/2021 15:21

So....

he just happened to be there when she nipped down for an onion ?

is has to be the busiest cellar ever 🤣

Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:24

@ScottChegg - your husband may feel threatened by the new urbane, suave neighbour. Do you have any friends that would enable you to socialise in a group? Perhaps people who are loyal like your husband?

DameAlyson · 13/08/2021 15:29

Perhaps people who are loyal like your husband?

People who go about dressed in matching knitwear? Is that what op has to look forward to?

AutistGoth · 13/08/2021 15:29

I admit, there are some of these that I can't place. Blush Though most, I can. Smile

Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:31

@DameAlyson

Perhaps people who are loyal like your husband?

People who go about dressed in matching knitwear? Is that what op has to look forward to?

She has to make a choice. Matching knitwear and a tidy shed. Or...?
DameAlyson · 13/08/2021 15:32

Myself and my flat mate need a third person to share with us.We are both female and considering a male flat mate.

While you're thinking about it, a word of warning to your flatmate - tell her to stay away from railway lines, or if she must go near one, she should be sure to wear a red flannel petticoat.

Maireas · 13/08/2021 15:35

So, two young women and a young male flatmate? Sounds risqué! What are the landlord and landlady like? Would she welcome a young man on the premises?

Nc123 · 13/08/2021 15:43

[quote Mathscourses]@Nc123, I think you should stay with your DP who shares a house with his best mate.

I have a feeling that in a few years time he’ll be working as a GP in a pretty Cornish town where it’s always sunny and summer. He’ll be earning loads of money and will make your supper every evening, even though it will always be a nice fish. You can pretend to work as the practice nurse, but really just go out looking for fit surfers every day. Or Al, if that’s how your tastes run.

Be careful of the local vet, though. I think she will pretend to be you.[/quote]
Oh that’s a really good idea. I think you could be right

LadyShrek2k19 · 13/08/2021 15:45

[quote Millionnewnames]@LadyShrek2k19

How awful! You sound lovely!
Ask your husband to mark an area on the drive with a parking space marked ‘drop in’.
Loudly announce to everyone in the community and possibly a small piece in the parish council newsletter that you are doing a charity project that involves mentoring poor and intellectually challenged folk. You know, teaching them to read and use cutlery properly.
Then anyone seeing ‘vest man’ and his entourage traversing your drive or calling out to you in the street by name will simply be reminded of your charitable nature as they will assume they are one of your projects .[/quote]
What an excellent idea!

Now all I need to do is get Daddy under control - he keeps wandering off at the most inopportune time, and occasionally naked, would you believe!

At least the new 3 piece suite - just like the one in Sandringham! - has been delivered eventually.

Now, must go and have a sing song in the dusky pink bathroom - the acoustics are great and it means my neighbour will most definitely hear me! He's a musician, you know!

NotImpossible · 13/08/2021 15:50

@Icecreamsoda99

Single mum with an 17 year old son. Long term relationship with a man but think he might be a cocklodger, always comes to mine for meals and spends the night (my son doesn't know about spending the night and calls him uncle). I'm hoping he will propose but I've been waiting years. He's much posher than I am and went to one of those public schools. It's further complicated by the fact he's my son's line manager. Not sure if I should kick him out or just accept things won't change and keep calm and carry on.
Oh, my favourite sitcom! "Don't tell him Pike!"
Bloodypunkrockers · 13/08/2021 15:56

@Killahangilion

I live on the same landing as two old codgers who expect me to cook them their Christmas dinner every year but the auld gits won’t lend me their record player for the old folks home Christmas dinner dance.

Their mate Winston who has one leg, promised me a lovely fresh Turkey but it turned out to be so fresh, it was still walking around the Toon.

I’m also still waiting for my manager to declare his undying love after he previously snogged me passionately when his wife went abroad for a week last summer.

They’re all good boys really but my fanny still aches for Richard, the king of Countdown.

People have tae know