I have no teeth - dating.

[guywithnoteeth]

I'm in a LTR, due to a medical condition my teeth basically disintegrated by the time I hit 30 and I've worn dentures ever since. My partner and I had a small heated debate about my lack of teeth and she is of the opinion that over 90% of women would refuse to date a man (or woman) who wore dentures. I said that was a rather shallow opinion. I'm mid-40s, FWIW.

AIBU - A woman WOULDN'T date someone with dentures.
IANBU - A woman WOULD date someone with dentures.

Someone who won't date you because of your teeth is probably a bit shallow - but people are all different and different people find things attractive/unattractive.

A partner who knows that you are sensitive about not having teeth and then picks on you about this is not a catch!

Your partner might be toothsome and lovely on the outside... but it seems that she is lacking in something far more important than teeth.

You can be kind and put up with her imperfections... but a lot of people would not.

I lost 5 front top teeth in a road accident when I was in my teens. I had a dental plate for the rest of my teens/20s and then a permanent bridge/implants since age 29. I had lots of boyfriends/snogs in that time and have been with my husband since early 20s (still together many years later). Obviously didn't put anyone off!

Your partner isn't very nice! I've always been a bit sensitive about my teeth and that sort of comment would have really upset me.

Hi OP, I'd think long and hard about your relationship - it sounds emotionally abusive. She might find "most men" would rather not date her if they realised how unkind she is. There wiil be lots of women who would automatically say "no way", but even lots of those women, will be able to see beyond the dentures, once they actually meet someone. Actually, I'm furious on your behalf 😠

My DH lost both his front teeth in separate accidents when he was a teenager and has worn a denture ever since. He told me before we kissed so it wasn't a surprise

Yes, i dated him, and married him and we've recently had our 25th anniversary - and he'd had several LTR and other encounters before we met. I don't think women are as shallow as that - or certainly they weren't.

OP, you said that your partner picks up on other ‘issues’. Are you talking about lack of washing up or is it more about you as a person (looks/ personality, etc)?

It just sounds a bit like she’s finding personal faults to either pull you down so you won’t leave or to (horribly) justify her reasons for leaving you.

Yanbu. I would date someone with dentures. I think your partner is being cruel to say something like that. There are lots of things that happen due to ageing or medical issues over the years - it will happen to all of us in one way or another. There’s no need to throw that in anyone’s face.

Really wouldn't bother me. My SIL has this problem. Her mother never took any of the kids to the dentists and she had to have them all removed at 25. It has never been a problem for my brother, as they are now married with kids :)

Teeth are one of my ‘things’, so no, sorry I couldn’t date someone with none/bad teeth/dentures. I’m sorry if I sound shallow

It would be a no from me I’m afraid. Just being honest.

Some people would some people wouldn't.

I work in dentistry and met my husband through work. If he hadn't had an accident with a garden tool we'd never off met. It knocked his front tooth out and he has a denture to replace the one tooth that's missing.

Of*

I've worn part dentures all my adult life (in a prominent part of my mouth). It's never been a problem for me or anyone else.

... although I do now look like an old crone when I take them out. I also wear an eye patch due to deteriorating sight. My husband thinks I am bloody gorgeous.

The dentures wouldn't bother me if, as in your case, it was down to a medical condition.
I would feel differently if they were needed due to a lack of dental hygiene though and it would put me off.

If they are decent, well fitting dentures, how would anyone even know? One of my friends has them, and I only know because she told me. They look very natural.

Well she sounds delightful. You’ve been together a long time. It is a strange thing to say, my other half has a denture - I’ve never mentioned it. I would question why she is being so mean. You might want to to reconsider your relationship, it’s obviously evolved over the years - but are you both happy? It’s a very vindictive thing to say….

YANBU. I don't think it matters much.

I lost a lot of my teeth in an accident. I have a variety of crowns and implants.

I probably wouldn't date someone my age (late 30s) with dentures. That probably sounds a bit shallow but I've spent a fortune and a lot of time making my teeth look decent. I would probably consider someone who hadn't done the same to be lazy and a bit slovenly (can't think of a better word!)

As I say, it probably sounds shallow. I made a lot of effort and went through a lot of pain for my teeth.

I probably wouldn't date someone my age (late 30s) with dentures. That probably sounds a bit shallow but I've spent a fortune and a lot of time making my teeth look decent. I would probably consider someone who hadn't done the same to be lazy and a bit slovenly (can't think of a better word!)

Or maybe they simply don't have a "fortune" to spend on your teeth like you did. I think it's very unfair to brand them lazy and slovenly when the issue might be purely a financial one.

But well done to you for going through all of that to get the teeth you wanted!

Definitely look into dental tourism I have had my implants dine at a fraction of the price in Spain

@sloutside

I probably wouldn't date someone my age (late 30s) with dentures. That probably sounds a bit shallow but I've spent a fortune and a lot of time making my teeth look decent. I would probably consider someone who hadn't done the same to be lazy and a bit slovenly (can't think of a better word!)

Or maybe they simply don't have a "fortune" to spend on your teeth like you did. I think it's very unfair to brand them lazy and slovenly when the issue might be purely a financial one.

But well done to you for going through all of that to get the teeth you wanted!

I used the dental version of Klarna!

As I say, I'm sure it sounds shallow. I went through years of being unhappy with my teeth. I was knocked off my bike and it was soul destroying having to pay that money.

I don't think I'd bat an eyelid. My mother's entire upper teeth were false. I never knew until she told me one day when we were discussing my OH.'s teeth.

My OH's teeth are pretty manky, partly genetics, and partly lack of self-care at a certain period. Meh. He's still fucking gorgeous.

As I say, I'm sure it sounds shallow. I went through years of being unhappy with my teeth. I was knocked off my bike and it was soul destroying having to pay that money.

I can imagine. I didn't mean to get at you or anything - just that others might really not be able to afford it at all.
I'm happy for you that you now have the teeth you want!

My friend’s husband lost several top teeth in a car accident when he was in his 20s, before they met. He just turned 60 and has had a partial denture ever since the accident (not the same one!). I had no idea until she told me, after knowing him for years. They have been married 30 years so it obviously doesn’t bother her.