Help! Who is in the wrong me or my boss!

[momofone18]

So. I need help. Very long post...

Scared to give all of the details as quite outing but necessary for context.

Worked for a company for 11 months. In that time 3 staff have left. Heard lots of stories about staff retention being generally awful but we are left with a team of 5.

2nd week of being with the company.. boss: oh you live by another colleague can you bring them into work and drop them home? Me eager to please says yes. I have done this every day that we are both in the office which is DRAINING, draining to talk, draining to not be able to call friends as I used to on my commute.

Due to Covid also, cleaner for the office was cancelled. Can we guess who took on the responsibility?

Grew really close with my team, love them so so much but couldn't help but feel the job wasn't for me. I couldn't focus and really didn't enjoy it. I find I am often the motivator of everyone with little input from my boss. She has no idea how her team feels at all.

I started the role on antidepressants and became determined that this would be the year I work on my MH for me and my family. I have been off medication for a number of months.

With this new clarity I decided to look for another job. In this time ANOTHER colleague hands in their notice. In doing so they were offered a pay rise, access to a pool car and to WFH.

I handed my notice in 3 weeks later to be told I am a disappointment for doing so. My reasons of family issues with childcare were null, and it wasn't a good time for my boss or the business. I have been told that despite my colleague being there longer and working 4 weeks notice. I have an 8 week notice and generally the conversation wasn't very pleasant. I left the room stating I would try and see what my new company would accommodate.

HERE IS MY ISSUE.

My contract does show a 2 month notice; for them to give me should they wish to terminate my contract. Further down it states that I am to give them one week.

Everyone I have spoken to says that clearly she is wrong but I don't want to leave leaving a sour taste, I am not a bad person and to say I am anxious about tomorrow's follow up would be an understatement. How do I comprise and how do I make this right? The sense of dread I have had all weekend is awful. I don't want to leave my team in limbo but this is a great opportunity!!

Help!

Its pretty clear!

It says we may bring your employment to end based on (table of service) therefore this means if they want to end her employment they have to give her 2 months notice as she has worked over 6 months.

It then says you can end the employment with us by giving oen weeks notice, therefore she just has to give 1 weeks notice.

Simple and clear!

Good luck OP! Getting out of there will feel like such a weight off

I hope you’ve sent that email back to your boss.
Any ‘I’m disappointed in you ‘
Is responded clearly with ‘Thats a shame, but I’ve been very disappointed in the job, the lack of support provided, all the extra demands outside the job role, the zero appreciation, and I think if you tally recent resignations it’s clear I’m not the only disappointed employee doing something about it.

Given how differently she treated your colleague, despite you bending over backwards with lifts and cleaning, it's almost as if she respects you less for being so accommodating. Not very nice of her, but not unheard of.
Maybe you (and I) need to accommodate less going forward!
Good luck with your new job!

@momofone18

Thank you so much for your responses! I really need to grow a pair I know! I honestly feel ridiculous as normally I am the loudest person out there it's just the confrontation and the dreaded 'I'm disappointed in you' that I can't bear! I know I should accept it and move on but can't help but feel like it's been a waste of 11 months!

I liked the line in Aliens where someone tries to guilt trip Ripley saying they are disappointed in her and she says: “I’m happy to disappoint you”, which is a great way to deal with that kind of manipulation. Your employer has behaved badly. Don’t be guilted into staying longer than you are contractually obliged to.

I would start working to rule so tell your car share person that from tomorrow you will not be able to give them a lift. Stop cleaning the toilets (beyond obviously after yourself). Generally make yourself a less attractive staff member to try to retain for two months. Then leave on Friday as per your contract and notice period.

@Cattitudes

I would start working to rule so tell your car share person that from tomorrow you will not be able to give them a lift. Stop cleaning the toilets (beyond obviously after yourself). Generally make yourself a less attractive staff member to try to retain for two months. Then leave on Friday as per your contract and notice period.

This.

Stop the lifts.

Not your bloody problem.
No cleaning either.

If you get any attitude, feel unwell and get out.

Do not accept any bullshit from that bully.

Good luck op!

They're going to kick themselves for having such a sloppily worded contract.

Good luck today OP - just remember that it doesn't matter what they say, you can legitimately walk out after a week and there's nothing they can do about it.

Good luck today OP

She seems in a much better frame of mind this morning. Going in as soon as her meeting finishes.

Wish me luck 🤢

Good luck!

Good luck!

One week and no more OP. You owe them nothing. They don't care about your MH or home life, you are easily replaced. You put you first.

Massive good luck.

Good luck!

I wouldn’t be able to resist throwing in “I’m really disappointed that you weren’t aware of how much notice I am contractually required to work. Given the high staff turnover this must be something you’ve dealt with regularly”.

Best of luck!

@Notaroadrunner

Contract says a week - leave after a week. She can fuck off with her 8 weeks. And might I suggest you read The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck before taking on a new job. Do not agree to do anything that is not directly related to your role, so that means no lifts for colleagues and no cleaning unless it's specified in your job description. Good luck with the new job.

Second this. I have The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck on my kindle and read it every couple of years or so as a refresher.

Good luck @momofone18
Looks pretty clear that it's one week. Have you got any outstanding holiday time as you could finish earlier if you are owed time. You owe nothing to anyone but yourself given the treatment you've had. Businesses need to cop on and treat employees with respect.
Well done for leaving. You'll feel an absolute weight of your shoulders by Friday.

Hope you stuck to your guns.

Sounds like she thought you were a ripe candidate for doing all the hard work bullying send a new note "further to my previous, the contract says one week so I will be leaving on x date".

Good luck.

She's probably in a good mood as she's thinks you're staying 2 months! Good luck

@momofone18

She seems in a much better frame of mind this morning. Going in as soon as her meeting finishes.

Wish me luck 🤢

Hope your meeting went well