To call the police? Not sure what to do...

[Livingtothefull]

We can clearly hear the couple next door rowing through the wall, this happens frequently. A couple of times (like today) it sounds as though it is getting really heated and I am actually concerned for her. I could hear him shouting 'Shut up', 'Shut your mouth' over and over again. I heard her whimpering a couple of times as if she might be in pain, and shouting 'Let go'.

I don't feel comfortable just ignoring this, however I am worried about making matters worse if I get involved.

I am worried about the possible implications for me if the neighbours were to know I had called the police or otherwise got involved (horribly selfish I know but my family is v vulnerable for entirely separate reasons and I just can't put us at risk in any way) - but am also worried in case it escalated and I had done nothing.

Please advice what you think I should do here?

Call

Call , say you can’t be involved or named .

Call the police, and explain you can't be involved, as above.

You need to call the police and ask for a welfare check due to concerns of domestic violence.

Call them. I had similar and told the police I didn't want neighbour to know I had called them. So police parked a few doors down and pretended they'd been walking past and heard the screaming themselves.

You could call the police and say you were passing by and heard .. (what you can hear) things are meant to be confidential but if you're worried then say that.

The main thing is that they are given a welfare check.

You must call. Please do it.

Thank you all. He has gone out I think so it has stopped.....should I call today even though nothing is happening right now, or wait till it happens again? Genuine question....

Call but obviously they will be aware it’s you that called

That is what I am afraid of Pumpkin. I am here alone with my very vulnerable DS.

I will call now as it would be better for her if the police went over when he wasn't there and they could see how she really was but others might know better than me.

I told my DV prick of a neighbour that I called the police on him and would continue to do so.

They are never as scary as you expect.

Call.

The worst he can do is knock on your door. Do not open it. If he continues to knock or threaten, call the police again and they can add another charge to his name. He'll only make it worse for himself and increase his chances of arrest.

If you’re ever in doubt call, its better to call needlessly than to risk not calling when someone needs help.

@NotWanting

I told my DV prick of a neighbour that I called the police on him and would continue to do so.

They are never as scary as you expect.

This. At the end of the day, you are dealing with a coward who will shit himself at the sight of police officers.

I called the police on my neighbours at Christmas (although it's her that's the loony, not him). They'll know it was me cause the house on the other side is empty but I don't care. I live with my husband though and I can understand why you might be nervous and hesitant. What bonfireheart said is a good idea - get them to pretend they were walking past.

I'd call now. The one time I called police on neighbour, he wouldn't even let her get two words out, was talking over her to the police, without him there they will hear from her.

Call today. Call now. This woman needs your help.

Please call. The Police will respect your privacy and you could save a life

Please call. An ex battered and tried to strangle me years ago. We lived in a flat and were surrounded by neighbours who definitely would have heard. I can't believe no one called the police. I managed to get away, fleeing the flat barefoot and in my nightie.

999 job. These things can escalate very quickly and be prepared that the call handler will ask you if the perpetrator has a weapon.

I would call and would call every time I heard it tbh.

Please call.
My neighbours once dithered about calling about what they could hear coming from my own home. I wish they had.
nb I'm OK.

Do you have a DP/DH @Livingtothefull?

My grandparents heard this through a wall and one day my granddad absolutely snapped and went storming round there, banging on the door and shouting "come out here and pick on someone your own size" (in fairness NDN was older and smaller than my granddad - I suspect if it was the other way round my Granddad might have not been so brash!). In the end his wife opened the door (see comments above about these men often being cowardly), apologised and said she was OK now.

I was only little so I don't know what happened next or whether they called the police. I do know they never heard anything again. I hope it was because he genuinely stopped, rather than anything else.

Do you have other neighbours? Could it conceivably have been someone else that called instead of you? At least that way you could deny it as would any of your other neighbours.

I'd call now and ask for advice. I've called 101 a few times and they've always been really helpful (once you get through!).

If he has gone out you could speak to your neighbour? I guess that depends on your relationship though.

I personally would call the Police