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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not self isolate with baby?

149 replies

auferste · 03/08/2021 16:25

My son is 7 months old, he went to his dads on Saturday overnight and his dad brought him back Sunday afternoon. Today, he messaged saying he can't see DS as he has to self isolate as his younger brother has tested positive for covid. DS would've been in contact with the brother.

WIBU to not isolate with him? I live alone so I'd have to Isolate as well and DS is fine.

OP posts:
ElizaDoolots · 03/08/2021 17:41

You should isolate really OP yes, I think you know this. However, in your situation I would still be going out for walks with the pram (but where I live it would be possible to go for a walk without being near anyone else). I certainly wouldn’t be going in any shops, baby groups or visiting people.

Fimat · 03/08/2021 17:42

I’m in Ireland so not not up to speed with UK rules but when you’re a close contact here you are allowed go for walks in quiet places. When my 3 year old was a close contact I pushed her in the buggy to the park and then let her run around in an empty spot.
I wore a mask, didn’t go into any shops and just had my shopping delivered. My DH was away so I was on my own.
It wasn’t nice but had to be done.
Obviously if you’re a positive case here you’re not allowed out of the house but you are allowed walks etc as a close contact.

pinatastick · 03/08/2021 17:42

If test and trace contact you to say he needs to isolate then it's a legal requirement to do so.

Individual situations don't come into it, it doesn't matter that you don't have a garden or that the baby won't sleep. Plenty of other people have had to do it, yes it's really rubbish, but it's just the way it is.

Ponoka7 · 03/08/2021 17:43

I also wouldn't test a baby, you could easily damage their nose and have no chance of swabbing the tonsils.

Sirzy · 03/08/2021 17:43

Waiting until contacted by T and T makes no sense at all. The risk of the baby and you being carriers is exactly the same whether they contact you or not as you know he was a close contact. We all know T and T isn’t the most efficient of services

PurpleDaisies · 03/08/2021 17:44

@Sirzy

Waiting until contacted by T and T makes no sense at all. The risk of the baby and you being carriers is exactly the same whether they contact you or not as you know he was a close contact. We all know T and T isn’t the most efficient of services
It is what the nhs says though.
Bagamoyo1 · 03/08/2021 17:44

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

Test baby, take a test yourself and follow government advice, instead of posting on here.

Sorry, just had it with selfish people claiming they don't need to isolate. YES YOU DO. This is why half of my friends are now testing positive. And I haven't seen them for 14 months.

Living alone means you're isolated already, you just might need to order in some shopping.

You haven’t seen your friends for 14 months?
User5827372728 · 03/08/2021 17:45

Baby in a pram being walked for a nap IMO can’t do much harm really. Especially if not symptomatic and coughing everywhere.

MrsR87 · 03/08/2021 17:45

Do you go to baby groups and the like? I go to to several throughout the week and I would be pretty peeved if I or my baby caught COVID from you and you knew about the contact!

Whilst it’s not law unless you’re contacted by track and trace, surely it’s better to try and keep everyone safe whenever you can. I’m not overly worried about catching it myself as I am double jabbed and young(ish) but would hate for my actions to infect the more vulnerable.

CakeandGo · 03/08/2021 17:46

Legally you don’t have to unless or until you are contacted by T&T.
If and when you are, then yes you should.
What you do until then is up to you.

Cancellingadvice · 03/08/2021 17:47

Have you actually asked your ex if his brother was in close contact with the baby?

LIZS · 03/08/2021 17:49

Ex's brother I assume, not the baby's? Yes you need to ensure baby stays inside or if you must go for a walk noone comes into close contact and he stays in pram. He will sleep inside though, presumably he does at night and probably does at ex's.

Ponoka7 · 03/08/2021 17:50

"If test and trace contact you to say he needs to isolate then it's a legal requirement to do so."

It is no longer a legal requirement.

KeyWorker · 03/08/2021 17:53

In your shoes I’d do a semi isolation. You do t have to isolate so I’d put the baby in the pram and go for a walk outdoors ect. Avoid the shops if possible and don’t let friends and family hold him for the isolation period, but maybe need friends for an outdoor coffee ect, just don’t them have direct contact with him. I yes only for 10 days.

Janaih · 03/08/2021 17:55

Use your common sense here. Stick to outdoor activities, keep distance from others and go to shops at quiet times etc. I would do daily lateral flow tests on yourself.
Of course if you do get contacted by test and trace then you will need to fully isolate. So good idea to stock up on supplies now. I really hope you don't have to Flowers

lazyarse123 · 03/08/2021 18:05

@Janaih

Use your common sense here. Stick to outdoor activities, keep distance from others and go to shops at quiet times etc. I would do daily lateral flow tests on yourself. Of course if you do get contacted by test and trace then you will need to fully isolate. So good idea to stock up on supplies now. I really hope you don't have to Flowers
Yes go to shops at quiet times because the staff don't matter. You need to isolate op.
miltonj · 03/08/2021 18:08

Don't blame you, I wouldn't test my baby either. Isolate if you are contacted by test snd trace but otherwise, I would just be sensible. Don't take him to others houses, go in cafes or have people round to yours. Definitely don't stop taking him on walks though, you both need the fresh air, but try not to stop and chat with anyone. I would also ask your sons dad what kind of contact he had with brother, they mightn't have gone anywhere near one another, in which case, you're fine to carry on as normal.

Cozytoesandtoast00 · 03/08/2021 18:14

Of course you should carry on walking with you baby for your mental health and for you baby's well-being, if your baby is asymptomatic. Just make sure you are not socialising with others x

lavenderandwisteria · 03/08/2021 18:17

I really sympathise actually. Mine isn’t too bad with naps now but there was a point I could only get him to nap in the car seat or the pram Flowers

I tend to concur with @NailsNeedDoing that I can’t see that walks if you don’t go near anyone are in any way harmful. Obviously, no one wants people to be unwell but I do think that while following rules for people’s safety is important, there really is nothing wrong with using a little bit of common sense.

Blah1881 · 03/08/2021 18:22

Do not stay indoors with the baby for 10 days, you will go mad. The rules are changing for isolation so soon. Everyone is going to get COVID eventually anyway and if they are vaccinated their symptoms should be mild. Stay away from baby groups, but please don’t confine yourself to your property on your own with the baby.

Cosybelles · 03/08/2021 18:25

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

Test baby, take a test yourself and follow government advice, instead of posting on here.

Sorry, just had it with selfish people claiming they don't need to isolate. YES YOU DO. This is why half of my friends are now testing positive. And I haven't seen them for 14 months.

Living alone means you're isolated already, you just might need to order in some shopping.

But government advice says they do not need to test unless they get symptoms Hmm
User5827372728 · 03/08/2021 18:26

@Cosybelles

Lots of areas as asking close contacts to test, but that doesn’t stop the 10 days isolation

Cosybelles · 03/08/2021 18:27

[quote User5827372728]@Cosybelles

Lots of areas as asking close contacts to test, but that doesn’t stop the 10 days isolation[/quote]
Heck! I thought we were only to test if we have one of the 'big three' symptoms. Either way, I would not test a baby!

MarmaladeToastAndAMarmaladeCat · 03/08/2021 18:31

Yabvu. The baby is a direct contact so needs to isolate. You don’t want to isolate as he won’t enjoy himself. Do you think any of us enjoy isolating?

I had to isolate my 2 and 3 year old for 4 weeks last year as we were in direct contact with a positive case, then had 1 day of freedom then had to isolate another 2 weeks as I was having surgery. Yes it was brutal but I bloody did it because I’m a responsible human being that doesn’t want to spread Covid around because I don’t fancy staying inside.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 03/08/2021 18:38

@Bagamoyo1

You haven’t seen your friends for 14 months?

No. Apart from the one who almost died from COVID (she then couldn't give it to me as she didn't have it anymore and I couldn't give it to her as she had antibodies).

Kept making plans but then someone would test positive so would have to cancel.

It's selfish people like the original poster who refuse to self isolate and keep infecting other people that have created this situation.

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