Second date fucking weird

[seconddateshithead]

Is this just me?!

Just went for a lovely second date with a guy from old. All good. Doesn't seem crazy or obsessed with ex.

His phone keeps pinging throughout our meal from his friend. Asking how the date is etc

He keeps saying oh I should turn this off. But he doesn't. He replies each bloody time.

End of meal. I'm thinking nice walk. Maybe chill on the terrace.

Oh my friend has asked if she can meet you. Really. It's a second date. I want to get to know you not your pissed up mates.

We walk home. But oh the bar is on the way. I say don't you just want to go home? He says oh we could just stop for one.

We get there and the barmaid brings over a drink for him. So they knew he was coming cos he'd said yes. (I get nothing cos I'm an afterthought obviously...)

I'm sure they're all lovely. But they're out celebrating with shots etc. I wanted a date with one person. Is this just weird?!

[ParrotShoulder]

Lying about his age is grim: 56 is very different to 48!!

Block and move on!

[Wafflethefuckinwonderdog]

He sounds like a prize prick. You've dodged a bullet OP.

[whatkindofdaughter]

Oh my friend has asked if she can meet you

She? He had a female friend who wanted to meet you?

I find your initial posts really hard to follow because you have speech (his words) in the same sentence as your own thoughts, all running into each other - it's very unclear who said what, and what are your thoughts.

I don't think the age thing is important. A lot of people lie on OLD sites because the cut off points people have are silly- he probably knew no one would search for 50+ men, and how people look and behave is not simply a number.

[BreatheAndFocus]

He’s rude - and so are his friends. Who tf texts someone on a date? His friends had obviously arranged to go out and were annoyed he was missing it because he was with you. He should have told them to get lost not pandered to them by dropping in on the way back!

[AtomicBronde]

How rude!

I would respond stating that the only connection he had was to his phone all evening!

Parker though

[CloseYourEyesAndSee]

@Livelovebehappy

It’s only a second date. Maybe he enjoyed the first date so much he thinks you’re ‘the one’ already and is excited to show you off. I would give him the benefit of the doubt if you like him, and see what the next couple of dates bring. I think just two dates is a bit soon to make an overall decision on him yet.

She doesn't like him. Why would she go on two more dates with this charmless twat?

OP please tell him what he did wrong. He's pretty much asking you to and it will feel really satisfying. Then block him before he can reply with some justification that will almost definitely turn it around and blame you.

[RevolvingPivot]

I can't believe you met someone online and went back to his house on the first meeting. Isn't that dangerous?

[CloseYourEyesAndSee]

@RevolvingPivot

I can't believe you met someone online and went back to his house on the first meeting. Isn't that dangerous?

When do you think a woman can know for sure if it's safe to go back to a man's house? 4th date? 6 months in? After they get married?
Women have to use our intuition and safety plan otherwise we would never get anywhere dating. Most men aren't rapists, oddly enough, and meeting online is where the vast majority of relationships start these days.

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

So... him having a date is so unusual his mates wanted to see what his prize was like!

Nope! Sorry Parker, not interested.

[RevolvingPivot]

@CloseYourEyesAndSee Not first date that's for sure. Anyway that's just me I've never done online dating.

[newnortherner111]

Second and last date. I hope you have self-esteem such that this is the case.

[TwoLeftSocksWithHoles]

Maybe he wasn't lying about his age, he was 48 when starting trying the meet someone... eight years ago.

[whatkindofdaughter]

I honestly think you need to re-think your own boundaries for online dates which includes going into a man's house you have only met once.

You said that everywhere was in walking distance- the pubs etc.

But then you talk about going into his house with him as he'd forgotten something (? But this was at the end of your date? and you said you were in the car ready to drive off.)

I really can't understand why you either/ or gave a man a lift in your car on a 2nd date OR went into his home.

It all goes against the rules of online dating and keeping safe.

[whatkindofdaughter]

How old are you, OP?

[whatkindofdaughter]

When do you think a woman can know for sure if it's safe to go back to a man's house? 4th date? 6 months in? After they get married?


Certainly a 2nd date is far too soon in my book to go into a man's house, if he's someone they don't know at all.

[Jumpalicious]

@blubberball

No point wasting your time, because he won't change. Sounds like a div.

The winning comment 😆

[Pogacar]

I don't think the age thing is important. A lot of people lie on OLD sites because the cut off points people have are silly- he probably knew no one would search for 50+ men, and how people look and behave is not simply a number.

Sorry, what?! You don’t think people have any right to decide they don’t want to date a 50+ man? It’s fine to lie about your age to a potential love interest? Only on cloud cuckoo land

[lastcall]

So he's 56, lied on his profile said he was 48, and acting like he was in his 20s with his friends ready at the bar ready to go with shots. Now claiming he 'misread' you ... right.

I'd move on, too, OP. Good luck.

[VodselForDinner]

Oh my friend has asked if she can meet you

He doesn’t want to date you, or anyone but this woman. He just wants someone to make her jealous.

He used you.

[CloseYourEyesAndSee]

[quote RevolvingPivot]@CloseYourEyesAndSee Not first date that's for sure. Anyway that's just me I've never done online dating. [/quote]
That's clear!
This was actually the second date also, as she said in the title

[TerraNovaTwo]

He sounds like such a prize.

[littlefireseverywhere]

This is only the second date, he’s trying his best. Doesn’t sound great…

[AdaThorne]

He either wanted to show you off, make someone else jealous or literally didn’t care either way because he wanted to drink with his friends.

Either way, bin him and move on. You deserve better.

[nettie434]

So many people who think that lying about his age is bad! It is bad but incredibly common, as is lying about income and type of car. I once read a very funny book by someone who got in touch with a man who told her all about his vast collection of vintage and high end cars. When they actually met up, she saw a man descending from the bus and walking towards the pub in which she was sitting in the window ...
I wish I could remember what it was called as it was really funny, all about her year of OLD.

Turning to the OP's date, the only possible way you could get away with not telling the truth about your age would be if you said you had not updated your profile since you joined. In this chap's case, that would look even worse as it would mean he'd was still trying after 8 years!

I do think taking you to the pub to meet his friends is not acceptable on a 2nd date, as is not making sure you have a soft drink. Sadly, it seems as if Parker can manage the dating thing better than his owner.