AIBU to be hopping mad and upset for DS?

[robotcollision]

Sorry this is long but I am so angry and upset on his behalf and have nowhere to vent.

DS2 (19 yrs old) has never had life easy. He has a very visible physical disability and an invisible one (HFA) which have given him more than his fair share of medical and social problems since birth. He had a truly awful first year at uni due to extreme isolation during Covid and some bullying.

The one thing that worked out for him was that he studied really hard and as a result got offered an exchange scholarship to a US uni for this coming year. The US uni was supposed to release a form to him in March that he needed before he was allowed to apply for his visa. He asked and asked for it. It was eventually released last week. He immediately spent 12 hours completing it and returned it to them.
They sent it back to him this week and he finally was able to apply for a visa. The visa interview date came through and it is two days too late for the cut off entry to his first semester at the US uni. (Term starts on Aug 19th. The latest day they will accept him is 3rd September. The visa interview means he can't possibly get to USA before 5th September at the earliest. We have phoned the Embassy - they can't and won't expedite it. The uni's delay in releasing the form effectively means they have jeopardised his entire study abroad year.

He now has no US uni, no one to share with at his UK uni as the friends he eventually made when he returned in the summer term have already got sorted for houses and his only option is to get an emergency accommodation back in the block where he was locked up alone and descending into severe depression last year.

I am so sad for him and so frustrated that there is nothing we can do to change the dates. And I am so so tired of him constantly putting such effort in to everything he does, from friendships to academic study, just to be perpetually knocked back.

Don't suppose any MNer has magical influence at US Embassy in London? If not, this is just a vent at the ongoing injustice in his life. I feel like nature didn't give him the best start and he deserves a break at some point.

@occa

If it's a big Uni there should be an international student services office you can contact. Most general Uni admin is unlikely to be too clued in about international student issues.

Has he been given the name of his student advisor yet (should be someone from his department)? You should contact them too as they can work their way through the Uni hoops a lot more easily than you can.

It's the international office he's been in contact with. Same person all the time. They seem... lazy. Three times this week he's asked them for info which they had promised to release ages ago and on each occasion she replied and then later he received the generic email , as if she'd only remembered to pass on the info to anyone at all after he nudged her for it. I mean, she's probably working from home due to Covid but the support from both home and US uni special overseas programme offices has been pretty vague, late or contradictory.

@robotcollision - ah you may be in luck!!
You could try and ring his office tomorrow and chase

I'm rubbish with time zones are they ahead or behind? I'd be setting my alarm to phone them at their 8.30am!

@RandomMess

I'm rubbish with time zones are they ahead or behind? I'd be setting my alarm to phone them at their 8.30am!

The US is behind 5 to 8 hours. OP can call them now!

I've DM-ed you. Good luck!

Good luck op!

he can apply for a second passport that he can travel on whilst the embassy process his visa. my husband has 2 passports for precisely this reason as he has to travel a lot for work and often one passport is being processed for a visa and he needs to be elsewhere so uses the second one. you need to submit a letter saying why you need a second passport but saying you will need to travel whilst visa is being processed should be sufficient. (other examples for why you might need a second passport are google-able.)

Also came to say Belfast - I got mine from there a few years ago and was much more straightforward. Why does he have to go to London?

I am in the US and have some experience with Universities here, I would be happy to make some calls for you if it would be helpful. I speak fluent ‘American’! PM me if you would like some help.

I don't know how to help but just wanted to say that I really hope that this works out for your DS!

@SeaToSki

I am in the US and have some experience with Universities here, I would be happy to make some calls for you if it would be helpful. I speak fluent ‘American’! PM me if you would like some help.

Thank you so much for the offer. Right now we have emailed everyone so are giving them a decent chance to respond. Tomorrow we'll start ringing the US uni and checking for cancellations.

My son is currently studying in the US and completed his first semester distance learning from here due to Covid.

His passport only took about a week to come back following his visa appointment so if you factor that delay in too you're realistically looking at say a month of distance learning? I'm sure it's not something that's beyond doable for the uni at all - I know my son's college has had procedures in place for on and off distance learning throughout his first year (they had horrendous weather back in February where they were all shipped off to sleep and study in a uni around 3 hours away, to name just one example not even considering Covid self-isolation!)

And... I don't want to make assumptions and/or stereotype anyone here but in my son's experience his college has not necessarily been the most organised with regard to paperwork... even paying his fees at the start of the year was unbelievably stressful - and they actually wanted the money

I know travel is incredibly difficult right now but check interview dates available at any US embassy he can get to, it doesn't have to be the UK. He'll have to stay wherever the appointment is but another country might have appointments available sooner than here.

@TheTeenageYears

I know travel is incredibly difficult right now but check interview dates available at any US embassy he can get to, it doesn't have to be the UK. He'll have to stay wherever the appointment is but another country might have appointments available sooner than here.

I didn't know this. Another poster suggested Belfast. I am absolutely looking into this first thing tomorrow. If he can get an appointment sooner elsewhere, he doesn't mind travelling at all. Thank you so much.

Thank you to all the people on this thread who have com eup with brilliant ideas to try and speed things up.

If you can use other embassy’s try Dublin...since Monday you can travel between the U.K. and ROI without quarantining if you’re fully vaccinated!

Belfast! See if they've got earlier appointments at the Belfast embassy. I've had to do this for usa visa mistimings before. It's a massive pita - he'll likely have to stay overnight in belfast for an early am embassy appointment. But it might sort the problem as the Belfast embassy often have better availability.

Just to say that it will have to be at a U.K. based embassy if that is where he is resident! If he has dual residency, definitely give it a go. But they’re currently 1.5m applications behind on US citizen requests! Madness

@movinghelprequired

Belfast! See if they've got earlier appointments at the Belfast embassy. I've had to do this for usa visa mistimings before. It's a massive pita - he'll likely have to stay overnight in belfast for an early am embassy appointment. But it might sort the problem as the Belfast embassy often have better availability.

That would be no problem. We have relatives in Belfast he could stay with. Going to call them as soon as they open tomorrow.

Can he get an earlier appointment at a none London embassy eg Belfast (not sure if feasible with Covid)

Sorry cross posted just seen Belfast already suggested. Good luck. I know people used to do that if they needed an urgent visa on a Florida travel forum I’m on.

Why not contact the British Embassy in Washington DC and get someone there to pull a few strings? It’s amazing what can happen when someone pulls in a favour with their US counterpart.

Not great news so far. Belfast has no appointments at all. Not even in 2022.

POC at overseas office at US uni has emailed back saying, effectively: there's nothing we can do to help you in any way - no late starts can be ratified and you can't join any classes via Zoom. We won't do that for you. Get here on time or don't come. They mentioned they had checked with Vice President of college on these rules, as if they knew we planned to go over their head to get advice. It was a real 'this is the end of the matter don't bother us again' email.

Given this is their muck- up I am pretty fed up.

No reply from MP yet.

Can’t help but wishing you luck.

I doubt they will have told the vice president, "I sent the form 4 months later than in was supposed to, they have immediately submitted it to the embassy but cannot get an appointment in time. My fault. Shall we just tell him there is no wiggle room?.

This person will have told them just that your son wants to come later.

Go above their head.

@Fiddliestofsticks

I doubt they will have told the vice president, "I sent the form 4 months later than in was supposed to, they have immediately submitted it to the embassy but cannot get an appointment in time. My fault. Shall we just tell him there is no wiggle room?.

This person will have told them just that your son wants to come later.

Go above their head.

Agreed. He's got absolutely nothing to lose by sending a polite and factual email to the Vice, outlining the issues and the timeline of delays.

I'm so frustrated for you and your DS.