To call a cleaner a cleaner

[ChilliChoco]

I was hoping to have a new cleaner start working on my house tomorrow- just 3 hours in a semi.
I found her through my previous cleaner who is semi retiring.
I messaged the new one today and asked her to bring id e.g a passport. I said by way of explanation, that I always ask cleaners for this as they are in my home and sometimes by themselves.
She called me 2 minutes later and was livid.
She was so upset that I had called her a cleaner and so I asked what she would refer herself as in English. (She is Polish so I thought it could be a translation issue). She said a housekeeper. I said I had never referred to a cleaner as a housekeeper. I would not mind calling her that of course.

However she was more angry by the fact that I had asked for ID. She didn't really let me explain but said she wanted to see my passport if I wanted to see hers. I did try and say cleaners have never had a problem with that (except one about 7 years ago). Anyway she said she was glad she found out what kind of person I was and she didn't want to work for me.
She then texted me to say I should
delete her number. I have actually blocked her.

in order to retain thread, MNHQ removed small paragraph as potentially disablist and in any case hearsay

YABU to call someone who cleans a cleaner and should not ask for id

YANBU to call someone who cleans a cleaner and can ask for id as normal practice

@BudrosBudrosGalli

She sounds incredibly dodgy! Of course, you should ask for ID if you pay for someone to be regularly in your house to clean. And she is a cleaner. A housekeeper does a far wider range of work. I would wonder if she is still legally allowed to stay in this country. And if someone shouted at me and behaved in such a manner, I might be tempted to pass on their details to the home office in case she does not have settled status. I am not from the UK but have settled status and paid my taxes, done jury service etc. Besides questionable status, I would wonder if this person isn't working without paying tax if she is this OTT about being asked to provide ID.

Is that you Priti 😆?

@ChilliChoco

If you don't ask for id and they don't come from an agency, then don't you feel uncomfortable with having a stranger in your home who could have access to your possessions? I mean I have never had a cleaner steal.anything and I help them out with personal stuff as much as I can as the relationship builds but I think its part of my due divergence to ask for id. However, would be interested to hear others' opinions on this.

Wow, a passport is the difference between being trustworthy or a criminal?

@KalvinPhillipsManBun

I understand what your saying but unless you know the person and also where he/she lives then you can’t just take another person’s recommendation without asking for ID.

The person is a stranger to you so you would always ask for references and photo ID.
I know it sounds extreme but you have to know who is coming Into your home.

There is nothing wrong with asking a potential cleaner for proof of ID and address. Asking about a DBS check is also perfectly reasonable if it makes you feel more secure, though none of these things will necessarily be 100% effective in preventing a crime. It just lessens the risk to some extent.

These people are coming into your home. And unlike plumbers, electricians, and other tradespeople, cleaners are coming into your home on a regular basis (though you shouldn't be hiring plumbers, electricians etc unless they are registered anyway, which at least gives you some form of identity confirmation if not a full background check). Any cleaner who refuses to provide ID or proof of address, or refuses to accept queries about a DBS check is quite obviously hiding something and not worth taking the risk with. End of. Anybody with nothing to hide would see it as a perfectly reasonable request considering you are strangers to each other. You shouldn't be afraid to ask and don't be steered away from doing it by anyone (including some of the posters on this thread). If they don't want the job, let them look elsewhere.

It sounds to me like the OP dodged a bullet with this Polish woman who more than likely had something to hide. Even if she was completely legit, it's not worth taking the risk. Especially with somebody who gets ill tempered with you.

On a related topic, having a criminal record wouldn't necessarily stop me from hiring a specific cleaner. It would depend what the record was. Some people have records for not paying their poll tax (from yesteryear) or taking part in public demonstrations. It doesn't mean they are dishonest or dangerous in any way. Use your own judgement. But don't be swayed from asking the things you want to know.

Oh, and as for the cleaner/housekeeper debate:

A cleaner cleans your house or premises. That might even include some laundry duties but not necessarily ironing (Hilda Ogden in Coronation St was a cleaner).

A housekeeper basically runs your house for you. Cleans, gets supplies, arranges other services on your behalf (tradespeople to do repairs, etc), and even cooks, etc. They tend to be more integral to a family, which is why some housekeepers are a live-in position. Some housekeepers might even watch your kids while you're out, if this is agreeable to both parties. (Mrs Doubtfire was a housekeeper 😆).