How do I find out her name?

[sillysituation]

In the grand scheme of life this isn't a major problem. But it's a little embarrassing.

We moved house in April last year so have been here a little over a year. The next door neighbour introduced herself in the first few weeks and was so lovely and friendly. She obviously would have told me her name at that point. Anyway, I've forgotten it 🙈

It's more and more awkward with each conversation. We see each other a lot and chat over the garden fence. I had a baby earlier this year and she was so interested in my pregnancy asking for updates on baby's arrival etc, and coos over baby every time I'm outside with her. Basically, I feel as though I have developed quite a lovely friendship with my neighbour over the past year or so. But I have no clue what her name is 😂

And now it feels like it's gone too far for me to ask, if that makes sense? If someone you'd been chatting to for the best part of a year suddenly said "sorry, what's your name again?" you'd be pretty offended right?

My question is ... how the hell do I find out her name without offending her?!

A few years ago we had some new neighbours move into a house nearby. DH met them and told me their names which I've changed to protect the innocent were Sally and Angus. She was more sociable than him and for some reason he didn't appear to have introduced himself to many other neighbours, so when Christmas came round several them asked DH what his name was (they knew hers) and he informed them it was Angus. Everyone exchanged Christmas cards... for 3 years. Until one day I discovered that his name wasn't Angus at all, but Richard . So not even similar in any way The poor man must have been utterly baffled why the entire neighbourhood thought his name was Angus . Thankfully they moved out soon afterwards...

@storminabuttercup

Get your DH to pop round one day for a cup of sugar, then get him to say thank you, oh my goodness I've forgotten your name, how stupid of me, what is it? Oh of course DW is always saying how she loves chatting with Pam.

Haha this isn't a bad idea at all!

I must admit when a pp suggested you tell the baby to say hello to Auntie......I did think Auntie Sarah 😂

Does she know your name? I’ve had this recently and I just decided to reintroduce myself, “I know the kids have been friendly for a while but I don’t think Ive actually introduced myself, I’m Betty btw” and she responded with her name aswell, it was fine! I haven’t rtft mind so I do apologise if that’s been covered lol

Do you think she owns her house. If she does, buy the deeds online for £3. Her name will be on them.

@ModestMouse11

Buy the title deeds for her house for £3 on land registry.

Her name should be on there if she's on the mortgage.

This

Or 192

Or electoral roll

Ask the postman.

Why not ask what she would like to be called by baby when she starts talking and hope she says Auntie Pam rather than Her at Number 58.

I had the reverse - Lovely neighbour called me by my DD’s name and I didn’t correct him, I don’t know why, just didn’t bother. But then he always called me it and it went on too long to correct. When he eventually realised he was totally shocked, and direct, and said “but I’ve always called you X, why didn’t you correct me?” I felt such a fool.

I do this with so many people 🙈 I dunno what to suggest for the best but I feel your pain.

Ask the postman?

Get your DH to write her a card for her 50th. Then if she says "Why did you put Sarah? My name's Emma." you can say "What? Oh no, DH just doesn't listen, I'm so sorry!".

Check the local electoral register?

Somebody called me Pam for years. It's not my name.

Land registry details. Unless she rents. Cost you a couple quid

I've been living near a lovely, friendly neighbour for almost 10 years now, and still don't know her name.

Whenever we see each other we have a good natter, but although she knows my name, I don't have a clue what her's is.

It's far too late to ask her now, and feel your pain.

Whichever way you ask her, do it soon. We had a delivery guy at work and every day I had to bellow "Karl's here". Turned out his name was Steve! I only found out because he asked me AFTER 5 YEARS why I called him Karl
Every. Day. For. 5. Years.

What I do in these situations is next time someone you know meets her say, “I’ll let you introduce yourselves” never fails

I'd be inclined to just bite the bullet, and next time you chat about anything remotely personal, joke about how you know this, that and the other about each other, and yet you've completely forgotten her name.

Once you have it, put her in an address book where you can add her birthday etc. and make a point, as she has, of using it when you greet her. That way it will go in, and if it slips your mind hopefully a quick run through the alphabet will help you get it back.

I'm so invested in this thread now I need to know this woman's name🤣

Phone up your local council and ask to be put through to the electoral roll which is where eveyones name is listed for paying their council tax and are registered to vote on, they should also be a copy in your local library of an electoral roll for your local area. Having worked previously years ago at a council and worked the odd time when its voting day know of such information, know for definate surnames will come up for sure.

Can you ask her to witness a signature for you? At least if you saw her surname you may be able to find her on social media via her husband?

Explain to her that you are "slightly deaf" (as is the case with my own husband as he wont wear his hearing aids) and say that you didnt hear properly - but then she may start to raise her voice in future conversations. But seriously thats not a funny statement either.

Or blame the lack of knowing her name due to forgetfulness and lack of sleep with a young baby which I am sure most women would understand all too/very well.

Just tell her the truth.
Oh god X, I am so embarrassed about this, All year I didn't want to tell you that when you said your name the first time, I didn't take it in, I have now spent a year waiting for someone to say your name.
Now your Birthday is approaching i need to write it in your card and DH things it's Sarah, I think it might be Pam, please can you put me out of my misery and tell me again.