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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Tradespeople using the loo

464 replies

JeanneDoe · 14/07/2021 09:53

Want to canvas opinions here.
We had a man over to service our burglar alarm.
It’s an annual service provided by the alarm company.
I’m WFH and my home office is above the downstairs loo.
Heard the alarm guy walking around checking out the alarm points around the house. Then heard him in the bathroom. Didn’t think there was a motion sensor in there.
He was in there for quite a while and then I heard a toilet flush.
Turns out a rather pungent bowel movement was had.
I am a bit pissed off. I know I’m unreasonable (and a bit precious) that I hate people that don’t live in my house taking a dump in my house.
But AIBU that he should have at least asked me if he could use our bathroom?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
newnortherner111 · 14/07/2021 10:11

I think you should expect a tradesperson to use the toilet, indeed I have read of some companies insisting on it.

Though asking, even if only to check which towel to use after washing hands, would be nice.

Youdiditanyway · 14/07/2021 10:12

If he’d asked would you seriously have said no? I don’t think I’d have had the guts to turn someone down like that. It is rude to do a shit in a stranger’s house though, especially when you’re there to work. He could easily go in a supermarket or something.

Sirius99 · 14/07/2021 10:13

I know one customer who rang up the office and wanted the tradesman sack for using their kettle to make a cup of coffee ( mug, coffee, milk, his own ) she felt she had been violated 🙄

Disfordarkchocolate · 14/07/2021 10:14

I would have expected him to ask but I would always say yes.

If my job required me to be in other people's home all day I'd carry something to mask the smell if I needed to do a poo.

Sparklingbrook · 14/07/2021 10:15

Yay. 'A tradesperson uses a toilet for it's purpose' thread. Things really are getting back to normal around here. Grin YABU.

Ohpulltheotherone · 14/07/2021 10:16

Eeeeh it’s not the most pleasant to realise someone has just taken a dump in your loo.
But realistically what else can he do? Drive to the nearest McDonald’s in the middle of your approintment?

My gas man did the same thing the other day, well he had a wee. I was a bit Confused that I was sat in the next room tapping away on my laptop and he’s had a loud pee with the door open but ultimately I’m not going to deny someone the need to wee!

Assuming he washed his hands and cleaned up then it’s just one of those things - not a story I’m going to tell over dinner but equally not worth getting wound up over.

Livpool · 14/07/2021 10:16

Who cares?! That is what toilets are for! You are being weird and precious

MrsToothyBitch · 14/07/2021 10:16

In an ideal world he would have asked but he was using the bathroom for the purpose it was intended. It's never nice poo-ing in soneone else's loo, but if you have to go, you have to go.

onlyhereforthecake · 14/07/2021 10:16

Strangers using your loo is not nice.

people can pretend they are ok with it all, but not everyone has the luxury of a downstairs toilets for visitors. When your loo is in your own bathroom as well, it is grim.

OhGiveUp · 14/07/2021 10:18

I don't care who uses my loo, so long as they leave it clean.

Sparklingbrook · 14/07/2021 10:18

@Youdiditanyway

If he’d asked would you seriously have said no? I don’t think I’d have had the guts to turn someone down like that. It is rude to do a shit in a stranger’s house though, especially when you’re there to work. He could easily go in a supermarket or something.
Depends how far away the nearest supermarket is and if they have toilets. If you are in the middle of a job at someone's house and the loo is right there use it. Otherwise what do you say to them 'just nipping to Sainsbos for a poo see you in a bit'?
Ponoka7 · 14/07/2021 10:19

"It is rude to do a shit in a stranger’s house though, especially when you’re there to work. He could easily go in a supermarket or something."

Our local Lidl/Aldi/M&S have closed their toilets because of Covid. There's a queue to get into Macdonald's and Tesco. People shouldn't be going into shops just to use the toilet anymore when one in a house they are in is available.

If I knew that I had workpeople in, I'd open the windows. There's always air freshener in there. This is overly precious.

Original poster
JeanneDoe · 14/07/2021 10:20

Ok thanks for the opinions. I’d have of course said yes, but surely it is just good manners to ask.

As I said I know I’m unreasonable being precious about people using the loo, mainly poo related. For what it’s worth, all of us in my house prefer to contain bowel movements to the house.
Anyway I’m not losing any sleep over it.
Husband down there at the moment giving it a clean. Result.

OP posts:
Crunchyorsmooth · 14/07/2021 10:20

@starrynight87

Would have been polite to ask, but not the end of the world.
Definitely this - he didn’t do it for fun or to be a nuisance, he needed a poo so he had one. But as pp have said I’d have been in there cleaning if afterwards
Sparklingbrook · 14/07/2021 10:20

I am generally out when someone comes to do something. The painter and decorator was here for a week with a key same as the people fitting the bathroom.
I assume the loos were used.

Crunchyorsmooth · 14/07/2021 10:20

*cleaning it

FourTeaFallOut · 14/07/2021 10:23

For what it’s worth, all of us in my house prefer to contain bowel movements to the house.

Prefer? Are you suggesting it was his preference to come and do a shit in your particular toilet. He just held it in since the morning to taint the purity of your porcelain?

rosesarered321 · 14/07/2021 10:23

Of course he should ask but of course I'd smile and say yes.
Then inwardly sign because I'd have to go and give it a quick clean.

FawnFrenchieMum · 14/07/2021 10:23

If you were in your office working be probably didn’t want to disturb you, especially as he was already wondering about your house.
Might be different if it was a tradesman working specifically in one room and you were pottering about in the kitchen.

knittingaddict · 14/07/2021 10:24

@Bluntness100

This topic has been done to death.
It has, but can't resist giving my point of view again. If people working in my house need to go to the loo then they are welcome to use it. I might not love a smelly poo, but the work man or woman can't control that, can they.

I speak as someone with IBS and that makes me empathise with others needing to use a loo NOW. And yes, they may be a bit on the pungent side too.

I just can't imagine getting so het up about someone needing to do something in my house that we all have to do. It's not a choice.

Googlewasmyidea1 · 14/07/2021 10:25

Fucking hell, I think I live in a parallel universe sometimes - it's a toilet, he used it for what it's intended for. You haven't mentioned that he left it in a mess or blocked the toilet so he just had a poo that smelled a bit. Open a window, spray some air freshener - you know, like most people would do. No sure why some people are saying it's grim, what the fuck is he suppose to do?

And maybe he didn't ask because he didn't want to disturb you working or he was afraid of you saying no

Sparklingbrook · 14/07/2021 10:25

For what it’s worth, all of us in my house prefer to contain bowel movements to the house

Ideal but not that practical if you want to ever leave the house. And alarm man was not of your thinking presumably.

Tabitha005 · 14/07/2021 10:25

He may have been embarrassed to ask, knowing it was going to be a nasty one.

The smell can't be helped, but if he'd left the toilet in a mess and not properly cleaned up after himself, I'd have been really pissed off! I've had this happen before (decorators), handed them rubber gloves, bleach and the loo brush and told them to sort it out. They were embarrassed (I didn't know which one of the two it was who left the mess), but did as requested and even managed to put the loo seat back down after that.

PeterPomegranate · 14/07/2021 10:25

I would like to be asked but I guess asking creates the possibility the home owner might say no. I would also avoid doing a poo at someone else’s house but sometimes you just have to go!

Lampzade · 14/07/2021 10:25

He should have asked, but I couldn’t give a shit( (excuse the pathetic pun) if people use my loo as long as they leave it clean.

Supermarket toilets are closed at the moment so there is nowhere for tradesmen to go
I have builders working on my house and I have told them that they are free to use the toilet.