To think it's rude inviting extras to someone's house?

[pilingup]

I've planned a get together for a special occasion next week and just invited just my parents and in laws - we don't have a big garden and the food I'm doing is more knife and fork style rather than sandwiches/sausage rolls etc so with our household and them we are full.

Anyway it turns out my dm's best friend p/my godmother who we haven't seen for years is staying locally for a few days and she's told them it's fine for them to come (in fairness they haven't seen each other for years so I let that slide)

Then yesterday I found out that dm has been telling my siblings about my "party" and they're also expecting to come, so it's just all getting out of hand. If I tell them they can't come I'll be the bad guy! I can't even change the food as I've bought all the ingredients.

To be honest it sounds like a load of unnecessary stress so I would cancel the whole thing and go out for dinner just the two of you!

Yes, it's incredibly rude of her.

How discreet are your in laws. I'd be tempted to pretend to cancel to your side and just have a meal with them.

I would just contact my siblings and sy at that I’m really sorry but your mother overstepped as usual and it’s only a dinner for the parents but you will sort a date for them to come and celebrate later

There’s always two distinct camps on these threads.

My inlaws (parents and siblings in law, there’s millions of them) and they always invite all their friends and friends of friends. It drives me up the wall. My H never says anything, he’s a bit ‘more the merrier’. As I never know until the FoFs turn up, it’s very hard to say anything.

OP, I think you’re doing to have to have it Out with your mum if you’re really not happy.

Wouldn’t be a problem in my house
The more the merrier.
Although I’d probably ask the extra guests to bring food ( they’d be fine with that )

It's all very well being more the merrier when it's just a general house party. I find it hard to believe many people would be happy with their own birthday party being turned into their in laws reunion.