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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS doesn't have anyone to go on holiday with

82 replies

stormysun · 09/07/2021 20:54

DS 21 has never been on holiday apart from with me and DH, he's said how he's been thinking about next year and that he doesn't have anyone that he could go on holiday with. He's never been in a relationship and has friends but not close enough to go on holiday with.

Is there anyone else's DC's in the same boat as my DS? I've told him that there will be other people in his position and it's not unusual.

OP posts:
LordOfTheOnionRings · 09/07/2021 20:55

Tell him to go backpacking! He will meet so many new friends on his travels.

romdowa · 09/07/2021 20:56

At that age , I had nobody to go with either. So I buggered off to Australia by myself !

Nowhere · 09/07/2021 20:58

You could suggest he joins something like this group
www.spiceuk.com/

I was a member years ago and lots of people went to events and holidays on their own.

ForeverSausages · 09/07/2021 20:59

@LordOfTheOnionRings

Tell him to go backpacking! He will meet so many new friends on his travels.
Literally that!!!!
helpfulperson · 09/07/2021 21:00

There are loads of companies like explore who run holidays either specifically for solo travellers or with a high number of solo travellers.

Caterinasballerinas · 09/07/2021 21:00

I don’t think he need to be really good friends with someone to go on holiday. Tell him to mention in his friendship group his desire to go holiday and see if anyone bites. If he’s willing to organise that would help some interest from a friend become a reality. I think with all the research you can do now, if he can agree with someone that they are interested in the same destination then they’d be compatible travel companions. The other option is organised tours for younger people where he is guaranteed to be with others, some will be singles, others small groups within a larger group. I hope these are helpful ideas and that this is something you can help him with.

Gwenhwyfar · 09/07/2021 21:02

"I don’t think he need to be really good friends with someone to go on holiday. Tell him to mention in his friendship group his desire to go holiday and see if anyone bites. "

Be very careful. You might get along great with someone in the pub once or twice a week, but 24-7 with them ( as some holidays are even though they don't need to be) and they may come back enemies.

VimFuego101 · 09/07/2021 21:02

I second the backpacking idea. There are tons of solo travellers in hostels and he'll find a group to hang out with.

Helenluvsrob · 09/07/2021 21:03

Go and have a very e cells that time alone. He’ll learn loads about himself and it’s probably the only time he won’t have to negotiate what you / where you eat etc.

I’m happily married. Taking himsrlf and the adult kids away in the summer in various combos and what I really crave is a long weekend away on my own 😂. Rome would be fab. But heck Aberystwyth would do!

SuperSleepyBaby · 09/07/2021 21:03

There are lots of people in the same boat but you don’t notice them as much - you just notice the big groups of people with lots of friends.

Has your DS always struggled to make close friends?

Shouldhavedoneitsooner · 09/07/2021 21:04

If he wants an active, drunken, budget kind of trip then he could try www.contiki.com/uk/en

MrsSkylerWhite · 09/07/2021 21:05

I went on holiday donkey’s years ago at 21 with a girl from work a few years older than me because I was in the same situation. We were honest with each other, we were each other’s only option (at the time).
We had a blast. Never became best pals but still send Christmas cards 38 years this year later.
Worth a punt with his acquaintances?

pollylocketpickedapocket · 09/07/2021 21:06

@LordOfTheOnionRings

Tell him to go backpacking! He will meet so many new friends on his travels.
Absolutely this! Do not force holidays with people, so much better to branch out alone and explore the world! What a fantastic opportunity!
littledrummergirl · 09/07/2021 21:19

Ds2 is in a similar position. I've suggested he finds a group to travel with. My dsil travelled the world like this when she was younger.

CovidCorvid · 09/07/2021 21:25

I don’t know if there’s any male equivalent groups but I’m in a female fb group of women who arrange weekends away, longer trips….so you can pitch up and not know anyone but everyone is friendly. It has an outdoors/adventure slant which might not appeal but there might be non outdoorsy equivalents.

welshladywhois40 · 09/07/2021 21:29

Ha he got an activity he enjoys? There are loads of things like sailing holidays, learn to windsurf, scuba diving .... many of those can be booked alone - and you meet loads of people.

My last solo holiday - I love to scuba dive so joined a live aboard boat for a week. Had a fab time

welshladywhois40 · 09/07/2021 21:30

And a friend of mine used 'flash pack' and now she regularly meets up and takes holidays with the people she met

PinkBuffalo · 09/07/2021 21:34

I used your companies to go on holiday in my 20s by my own. Got to make friends too I would recommend it 🙂

PinkBuffalo · 09/07/2021 21:34

That should be TOUR companies autocorrect!!

FlyingBattie · 09/07/2021 21:41

There are companies that do tours, eg of America. join one of them, he may make friends, he may not, but at least he'll get to see the world!

Tal45 · 09/07/2021 21:41

I've travelled alone a lot and met so many people, some were short term friendships and some I still keep in touch with 15, 20 years later. Staying in dorms in hostels is a great way to meet people, travelling on your own is considered perfectly normal and a lot of hostels also put on activities.

Dontdripme · 09/07/2021 21:43

Perhaps he should go travelling

Concestor · 09/07/2021 21:44

I've never been on holiday with a friend which meant that when I was single from 23 to 32 I didn't have any holidays away. It sucks. I wouldn't have been brave enough to go alone.

MojoMoon · 09/07/2021 21:45

There are loads of holiday companies aimed at solo young travellers - Contiki or Busabout or GTravel for drunken city or beach breaks in Europe, Intrepid or Oasis Overland, for more exotic adventurous trips like across Africa or Asia or ones aimed at particular sports like skiing etc.

Not all those companies may have survived Covid but as soon as travel is fairly free again, there will be lots of them running. Popular with Aussies on tour as well as Brits.

He could head off to a big backpackers hostel in any big city in the world - there are usually semi-organised pub crawls, pub quizzes, activities etc. But perhaps if he isn't so confident, an organised trip might be best for his first time.

100percent21 · 09/07/2021 21:48

My daughter did charity trip volunteering alone. Was so worried as she is so shy. Was making of her. She been back to same county three times. Hope all goes well for DS